INFJ mistype? | INFJ Forum

INFJ mistype?


May 31, 2014
I apologize for my rambling... I am just in a self doubt crisis :m097:
I'm an INFJ, and as much as I relate to just about EVERY LITTLE DETAIL about the INFJ I always go through little bursts doubting my type. I have gone through lots of "are you sure your an INFJ? you could be xxxx." And I'm sick of that and need confirmation from the experts...

Though I believe that that very thinking process is a Ni Ti loop which is present in the INFJ.

And if anything I fall victim to thinking loops rather than... what ever extraverts... do...

When I first began to practically obsess over the MBTI, after I already typed as an INFJ, I thought I could be an INFP... mainly on the basis that they were creative, imaginative, good writers... but that soon blew over after finding out how easily irritated I get at actual INFPs... although I love them to death. They are obviously called Dreamers for a reason.

I thought I could be an ENFJ and still/always consistently feel that way. My mother is an ENFJ. 2 of my closest friends are ENFJs. I know them every well... and granted I can act just like them, but I am not always them. But, if I was an ENFJ I would be out with a group of consistent friends I feel close around, that I don't have right now, on this Saturday instead of sitting alone on my living room couch on a typology forum...

My friends think I'm extraverted... I am by no mean shy... I can be quiet... and defiantly awkward, especially when I have something on my mind. And I often quite am unless I am in a large group of people then I just go all out Fe I suppose and talk to every living thing in the room for a short time and move on to the next living thing. But to me that's a game. I put on this friendly cuddly teddy bear self because when I do that's when people are happy and have a good time around me. However I call my self ambiverted. I can do with both. If I'm alone I can walk around in my mind doing what not. When I'm alone I can be myself which is somewhat crazy ESTP like freedom I feel in a way. If I am with people... yes it somewhat drains me... and for the most part the ENFJ crowd pleaser or ESTP crazy person who makes every one laugh is a get up that I enjoy playing sometimes.

It all boils down to this: I have an extraverted ENFJ/ESTP switch that I can flip on. But the fact that I have to consciously turn it on seems to indicate, to me at least, that I am an INFJ.

I am a very playful INFJ if anything. But I am also quite, observing. Slightly obsessive when it comes to psychology. I am Ni all the way. And defiantly not Fi... considering at a social event I make my way to every single person I know and spend time with, and is pretty much a superficial get up that I HATE to do but for some reason I do it. I don't feel like I care a lot about other people, as much as I can understand them. If I had a Dual it would be an ESTP. They are my beautiful opposite if I had to choose one. I feed disconnected and disembodied from my surroundings, and the only thing that can help bring me out is being with a large group of people and using my Fe. And any ESTP I encounter I feel an immediate affinity between the ESTP and I. On the contrary I find most ISTPs rather irritating... and clingy if they like you... so I am not quite sure if that is relevant information. I feel like you can type someone if you know who their friends are. And all my closest friends are in the Idealist temperament. I immediately fall in love with ENFJs and ENFPs because they reach out for my hand and they help pull me out of my mind. INFPs.... I have to reach for them... but its a privilege once they hold back. I think I know two other INFJs... one is super private and kinda rude... so I think he's a mistype... and the other is another beautiful human being who I love sharing time with. Both are like 30 years older than me though... Don't know anyone my age who is an INFJ.

My father is an ISTP so I know a lot about them as well. And my Mother being an ENFJ I know them well and I am used to their seemingly over productive life style... and I am nothing like my mother in that regard.

Being the typical old soul? Most people on my surface life would think my mental age is 5. And my good friends say I am 72.... So... there is one stereo type I uphold.

I have also considered INTP. I thought because INTPs are witty philosophers basically, and that's what I love. I love INTPs and I think they are hilarious and I feel like I think just like them at times. But I am not a lazy procrastinator that the INTPs are stereo typed to be. And if anything I am more of the XNFJ.

Enneagram wise... I would self type myself as a 4w5. But I score highest on tests as a 2, which I do agree with... and it would make sense.

INFJs are not typically 2s from what I see. Thus which has led me to the doubting of the type again, and thinking I am an ENFJ.

So do you think I am an INFJ mistype? I would love to know more about enneagram and the subtypes of enneagram if that is making a variation for making me feel ENFJ.

My Socion could be INFp Fe, and that is causing the INFJ preference in MBTI but I can easily look like and act like an ENFJ.

People who never met me at a party says I am an introvert. Where people who came to know me at social events call me an extravert. But my good friends say I could be both... But there is defiantly a big difference between me "off stage and on stage" in a social sense.

Lemme know what you think. Ill answer questions to help. Its been over 6 months I've been researching everything and I think its time to get reassurance by communicating with other people!! Break that Ni Ti loop by engaging with Fe I suppose!

Read more:
Let me explain to you what helped me figured mine out. If you posted this a month ago, you may still want to know because you said "obsessed."

I know my functions, and how they all work together, but here are all the functions in descending order for me:
High functioning
Ti and Ni
Se, Ne, Te, Si
Hardly used

The cutsie names for the four functions we use are misleading. First is Ni in the ideal INFJ stack. It causes confidence, drive, and just "getting" stuff. Then Fe is how we relate, since we can't connect to others by an introverted trait. Ti comes into play when we are distressed, defensive, et cetera.. Justifying our side is one way we get stuck in a Ti-Ni loop. The so called "inferior" is really stronger than you think. But it works in the sub-conscience. It affects all the other functions. For me, I get migraines when there is too much commotion around me. I also love impressionist like photography. My home has lines and composition that I love to stare at like how you stare at those pictures you can only see if you see through them cross-eyed. I am also sensitive to wind. Irritates me. So don't like Se must be the least developed, or that Fe must be somethign we are comfortable with. So many little things make us all different. Which description feels right to you?
It seems that you are overthinking it... Make it simple, human personality is a complex subject, with a ton of nuances and subjective opinions and observations. Typology systems are made to simplify that, don't expect from them to cover all of your contradictions, tastes and preferences. MBTI works with 4 cognitive functions in hierarchical order, the Enneagram works mainly by fixation and instincts. Both of them are made to get at something of your personality, not to give an accurate explanation of your "whole" personality with all of your nuances, quirks and stuff like that.

If you're confused about extraversion vs introversion then, ask yourself the next question: Do you feel drained by constant human interaction? See, i can go attention whore mode on too, but that doesn't mean that i'm an extrovert, the constant draining predominates.
ENFJs have inferior Ti, not Se, which makes them different from INFJs. Overall, they have more trouble at analyzing things, and they can obviate some details for the big picture, missing important data for Fe's drama sake (can't blame them haha), making their speech and demeanor more loud and dramatic, sometimes it may seem innacurate, and exaggerated, since for this type, the emotional atmosphere is something that they're extremely attuned to.
INFJs have inferior Se, means that they shut off from outer stimuli to see things from a detached perspective, unlike ENFJs i do see this type as more prone at being stuck in life because of this(once i made a joke to my INFP friend about introverted intuition, saying that it is like extroverted sensation but in slow motion), given that we are constantly revisiting our observations and often hesitant to take action... They may face similar problems as ENFJs regarding analytical thinking, but with this type, Ti is more at hand, making them a little bit more aloof and distant, and also more elaborated and level-headed in their observations, and speech (i've experienced and seen the contrary actually, but i won't get into this, the reasons for this differ, and i don't mean to over-complicate this)... Given that Ni is dominant, INFJs may be much more disconnected from the environment, and even the people around them, they may elaborate strong and sophisticated views, plans, ideas, etc... but they're often oblivious of the practical implications of it (Se), so they may require more conscious effort in that field. Don't see ENFJs as specially disconnected from it, Se is tertiary, so they can be much more spontaneous, and execute their plans more often than their introverted twins.

ENFJs spread themselves more, generally, specially with people, that's extroversion, INFJs are more nitpicky about that, we're often kind and funny, and some love to party, but we hold ourselves a little bit more, much more quiet and elusive generally.

Edit: I've know an INFJ Enneagram 2 ftr, it's not rare.
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