In what ways have you changed over the years? | Page 2 | INFJ Forum

In what ways have you changed over the years?

Oh. By observing their work-ethic. If someone's willing to work hard, you want them to work hard for you.
Those two things might differ in the person's attitude. And in addition, it goes both ways. It's a prerequisite for most people.
 
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Those two things might differ in the person's attitude. And in addition, it goes both ways. It's a prerequisite for most people.
What two things might differ in the person's attitude?

Also, I do agree that hard-work in a relationship does go both ways.
 
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What two things might differ in the person's attitude?
The things that make a relationship work. You may call it work ethic, but it needn't relate to work ethic at work. For some people relationships are different from work, and as such they have different attitudes towards them.
 
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What two things might differ in the person's attitude?

(with apologies for butting in) Assuming working hard at work vs working hard in a personal sense. They can indeed be vastly different in the same personality* and can be affected by a specific person - you can have someone who's a "slacker" but is very serious about some people and not others.

*from my own research so don't have a nice paper to back it up with
 
(with apologies for butting in) Assuming working hard at work vs working hard in a personal sense. They can indeed be vastly different in the same personality* and can be affected by a specific person - you can have someone who's a "slacker" but is very serious about some people and not others.

*from my own research so don't have a nice paper to back it up with
That's true.

Being a slacker is a character flaw. It's bad to slack at work and in our relationships.
 
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Sweet topic! Never thought about this but I'll give it a go.

At the political and economic level: I was raised to form a right wing conservative perspective/belief politically, but now I think political parties pursue an agenda that serves merely a certain aspect of the society that simply doesn't serve a purpose for all. There never will be, as these types of people just like to argue about it not even ever stepping into a laymans shoes. Economically I am not driven by fancy things or financial security. I do think it'll come soon enough.

At the religious level: I have never been the religious type per say. I do believe in eternal life of a soul and that's that.

At the personal level: One word, tremendously. With the problems I had I have been able to overcome so many things I can't even remember. I'm more patient, confident, curious and prepared more than ever. As a child I believed I could do anything, but now I have the experience to back that up. I do leave jobs as I please, I do leave relationships as I please and I trust my intuition more than ever. I couldn't give less of a s*** of what people think as I feel like it's something everyone has the right to do anyways. I do still wonder why people think like they do but that's just something to keep me curious I suppose.
 
Found some loose change in my pocket once. That was an exciting day.
 
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Loaded question, but:

INFP/J-T to INFJ-A.

I've grown a lot. I made a habit of intense personal growth needed to overcome depression in my early 20s, which, over the course of new challenges and experiences, led to a spiritual awakening. The trigger was anger, and anger has been the single greatest tool of my personality that has fueled change and creation to higher plateaus. Extremely harsh, "unsophisticated" opinions are my trademark, and they've come out through what I've posted on here over the years, and I know I'm wildly unpopular to a select few individuals here because of that, but it's not like I've cared. I have had the same issues with family. Not a one understands that except for my brother. I've learned to fly off the handle a bit less. It's just easier to pick and choose my battles.

The power of anger; I wouldn't be me without it. I've learned to harness what most would perceive to be a negative trait, but it is only negative in the toxic mind of he who wields it. I've become so incredibly strong. I often wonder how strong I can become in this world, before my death, so that I may take the universe with me to the grave, and that my knowledge may be of use to me in death, as I know it will be. Thus, propelled my interest in consciousness, the afterlife, paranormal phenomenon, and consequently, the occult. But one who flirts with pure evil must pay his dues, and I have. And so, after having created evil, and seeing it manifest in my world in very negative ways, I have learned even more so the power of mind, and that mine is a fierce weapon. I must continue to wield that weapon for the greater good of my path, to reach my higher self. He who sows, will reap.

And, as toxic energy has and continues to be expunged, my time of healing is fueling even more growth and change. I like to see life as a series of transformations. Sagas, in retrospect. I'm constantly working toward a goal, many at a time, both large and small. I'll never be complacent with the here and now. If I can dream it, it will be. I will make it happen, because this universe is mine for the taking.

-Afterthought: I'm better at giving advice to people about random things than taking my own. Hm.

Second afterthought: It's wonderful to be even more in control of yourself than ever before. To witness an action from another individual directed towards you or in response to your presence (a reflection of them and their projection), and to see it, but do nothing, instead of react instinctively. Silence is great power.
 
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-Afterthought: I'm better at giving advice to people about random things than taking my own. Hm.

Can relate to this quite a bit both with acting as an advisor for quite a few people and not being able to make use of the same advice for myself. And even being told I have a double standard for these things which is rather true even if it's something that still haunts me.

As for the darkness (whether it comes off as anger or something else) I think it's always there to a greater or lesser extent and it's up to us to find a way to navigate it without becoming totally disoriented.
 
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Can relate to this quite a bit both with acting as an advisor for quite a few people and not being able to make use of the same advice for myself. And even being told I have a double standard for these things which is rather true even if it's something that still haunts me.

As for the darkness (whether it comes off as anger or something else) I think it's always there to a greater or lesser extent and it's up to us to find a way to navigate it without becoming totally disoriented.

With knowledge of personal darkness comes an equal depth of knowledge of our own light. What we nurture is what will grow, of course.
 
Totally this. I feel like (for me) the transition into a long-term relationship and parenthood plays a role, and it’s kind of a challenge to find the time and motivation to continue to exercise my individuality. I frittered away a lot of my solitary downtime in useless and sometimes unhealthy ways, but that time also allowed me to achieve heights of creativity and energy that I wonder if I’ll ever achieve again. So much more of my time seems spoken for these days. It’s for good reasons, but it’s changed me.

Totally right there with you both... @acd - I think this is a transitory way of being...shorter or longer, sometimes sparking the generic “mid-life crisis” for certain people or they start to have those feelings because of a mid-life crisis...but that isn’t always so.
Anyhow...I try not to think of my thinking or my life as - it will always be such and such way - even as far as being an INFJ is concerned, not that I am accusing you of doing that...speaking mostly for myself here now - I have to hold tight to hopes of better things to come or it would be difficult at times to warrant living it.

Anyhow, those things like precognitive dreams and such are still there imho...like you said, we just get busy with life and the less you use something, or the more stress you have, etc. the less it will happen...I think anyhow.

Having a family is a serious commitment to your time and energy - there is just no avoiding it...that whole bullshit about - if you want time for yourself you will find it - is utter nonsense once you have a child...hahaha.
I just had one...step-son at that...so I can’t imagine having more than one kid...and I consider mine pretty easy...never fussed, always happy, intelligent, kind, good grades without ever twisting his arm...I’m a bit biased though I admit. ;)

I still have hope that you will both find more of an outlet for your individuality to come out...being on disability gives me the opportunity to do stuff like meditate whereas I couldn’t before...that is a luxury I know many don’t have time to really try or practice.
So I can’t hate everything that has happened to me as I was “thrown” from the “rollercoaster" of life we are already on a few years ago...lol.
And I certainly did for a while there.
Nothing will destroy or make you seriously reassess your own ego like watching your career you worked your ass off and loved doing slip away and know that it is slipping away and you can do nothing to stop it.
To then have to seriously rely on others like never before.
It can break you down.
But I also find that it is necessary in order to grow in other ways.
You are both wonderful and compassionate people who have always expressed thoughtful and intelligent commentary and/or advice - I am happy and grateful to know you both.
Hang in there...one thing life certainly does well is change.
Much love!
 
Loaded question, but:

INFP/J-T to INFJ-A.

I've grown a lot. I made a habit of intense personal growth needed to overcome depression in my early 20s, which, over the course of new challenges and experiences, led to a spiritual awakening. The trigger was anger, and anger has been the single greatest tool of my personality that has fueled change and creation to higher plateaus. Extremely harsh, "unsophisticated" opinions are my trademark, and they've come out through what I've posted on here over the years, and I know I'm wildly unpopular to a select few individuals here because of that, but it's not like I've cared. I have had the same issues with family. Not a one understands that except for my brother. I've learned to fly off the handle a bit less. It's just easier to pick and choose my battles.

The power of anger; I wouldn't be me without it. I've learned to harness what most would perceive to be a negative trait, but it is only negative in the toxic mind of he who wields it. I've become so incredibly strong. I often wonder how strong I can become in this world, before my death, so that I may take the universe with me to the grave, and that my knowledge may be of use to me in death, as I know it will be. Thus, propelled my interest in consciousness, the afterlife, paranormal phenomenon, and consequently, the occult. But one who flirts with pure evil must pay his dues, and I have. And so, after having created evil, and seeing it manifest in my world in very negative ways, I have learned even more so the power of mind, and that mine is a fierce weapon. I must continue to wield that weapon for the greater good of my path, to reach my higher self. He who sows, will reap.

And, as toxic energy has and continues to be expunged, my time of healing is fueling even more growth and change. I like to see life as a series of transformations. Sagas, in retrospect. I'm constantly working toward a goal, many at a time, both large and small. I'll never be complacent with the here and now. If I can dream it, it will be. I will make it happen, because this universe is mine for the taking.

-Afterthought: I'm better at giving advice to people about random things than taking my own. Hm.

Second afterthought: It's wonderful to be even more in control of yourself than ever before. To witness an action from another individual directed towards you or in response to your presence (a reflection of them and their projection), and to see it, but do nothing, instead of react instinctively. Silence is great power.

PM me or hit me up on my thread.
I have access to texts and books online, information that you may find very useful in your pursuits.
Things I usually don’t post up just anywhere.
It depends on what you are specifically trying to work on currently...let me know.
Cheers!
 
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