[INFJ] How you learning about you being INFJ has changed your life?

Learning that I use my tertiary Ti to wall of people has helped me with personal growth, I suppose. Instead of going into Ni-Ti shell now I am trying to develop better boundaries and improving my Fe.

Another thing was about my inferior Se and how I need to stop spamming it for stress relief.

TBH I was always comfortable with my Ni, even though people often remarked that I shouldn't be in my head so much but deep down I knew they were wrong and this day-dreaming was natural for me.

 

I got surprised that I have the rarest personligt type. I had never heard about the MBTI test before. It helped me to understand myself better. For example, I daydream a lot more than other people. And I have many contradictory traits such as seeming really shy even though I'm not, and I'm very introverted but I can be very talkative.

 

I had poor Fe skills as a child. I kept other kids at a distance with my intellectualism. I thought I was INTJ, so I tried to go hardcore on the Te-Fi axis, but that caused:

1. arguments with other people
2. pressure to take over and do things my way
3. a never-ending stream of criticism of others in my mind
4. defensiveness of my own values.

It was not a light and happy place.

I was disgusted at the idea of being an INFJ. What kind of wussy person was that? Someone with FEELINGS instead of LOGIC? No, not me.

Well, guess what? Ti is intellectualism par excellence. Te accepts outside facts in order to achieve quick, efficient results. Ti is the function that has to understand everything before it believes. Ti is mental strength. That is not wussy.

As for Fe, it's fun. Way more fun than Fi. Now I can transfer my hardcore values into the category of Ti and keep them safe, as in, "This is my truth, and you will not move me. I know how this works."

My feelings are used for creating harmony or avoiding conflict. I play with people. I'm actually fun to be around. I have lots of friends. Hey, this is way better. I'm not stuck on heavy values anymore. People have their own, and I have mine. Just flow with it.

Ultimately, I think it is important to learn to use all functions in all orientations. Currently, I'm working on tamping down my Ni in order to enjoy my Se and get a better read on reality. Also, I'm trying to remember my Si lessons and recognize multiple Ne opportunities.