kylabenson
Newbie
- MBTI
- INFJ/P
Tell me..
Do any of you feel like you know something no one else does, as though you are apart of some 'elite club'.. i think im talking spiritual here, though im unsure, but it is as if you know and have seen the 'bigger picture', 'what matters' what its all about, and that all this is just 'bullshit' it's like being back to the raw fundaments of humanity.. being stripped of material related ego shit,
I never had it growing up, not like this... though.. all my life i have known and felt i was very different, (swimming against the current of people) but i think that's just the pisces in me.. all that dreamy fairyland bollox... this is more intense, though along a similar line, its seeing the 'TRUTH' and KNOWING its REAL.
One thing i can be sure of, and that is.. i have suffered trauma in my life (much like many i suppose) and i took a few years out to heal myself 5 to be exact, (yes i did need it)
I am nonjudgmental totally peace loving and suffer no ill will, negitives nor insecurities, but i've been left with this heightened 'thing', i say heightened because i believe it has always been there.. but never to this extreme clear perception.
The best way i can describe this in a metaphor would be... As if you are sitting way up high on a tall building looking down on everyone just going about their normal day-to-day life, totally oblivious!! totally clueless!! just small mindingly concentrating on the synthetics of life, i.e what the rush hour traffic will be like this evening, and what to cook for Tea tonight.. clutching on like dear life to magazines of celebs caught without their make-up blah blah blah..
I feel so detached and not apart of it, despite accepting and living amongst it as best i can, but deep down im really in my own bubble, in fact.. well i know i am, i just manage to go through life in stealth mode to enable myself to fit in, as best i can
I know... that should i think to hard about it, i could really send myself into despair, so i do not, but the reminence has changed my insight and how i view things,
and that is something i cannot change, partly because this 'bigger picture' that i now know, wont allow me too. because i KNOW it to be real, and it's better, and you don't diverse from something that is better. (how fuked-up am i sounding right now?)
Its almost like i've been picked up and placed in a foreign speaking country, as if someone had picked up my world and shook it like a snowstorm in a bubble!! and the world as i knew it before is all just bullshit in comparison...
i'm left feeling like.. someone has taken something from me, like a kind of innocence in a way, i feel cheated, 'why cant i just be like them!' just going about 'normal shit,' totally oblivious!! i know im NOT crazy, but this 'sense like' is so heightened, is almost as if it could be.. is it a phenomenon? is this how mediums and psychics feel? it's form is very 'prophet' like to me, (tho im by no means saying i am 1, thats just ridiculous)
what ever it is, gift - insight - intuition - curse.. i don't care, its not unique.. its lonely..
i'm too young for this shit!!
yeah deep i know but please if anyone does relate to any of this, i would be so happy to know im not alone here..
Do any of you feel like you know something no one else does, as though you are apart of some 'elite club'.. i think im talking spiritual here, though im unsure, but it is as if you know and have seen the 'bigger picture', 'what matters' what its all about, and that all this is just 'bullshit' it's like being back to the raw fundaments of humanity.. being stripped of material related ego shit,
I never had it growing up, not like this... though.. all my life i have known and felt i was very different, (swimming against the current of people) but i think that's just the pisces in me.. all that dreamy fairyland bollox... this is more intense, though along a similar line, its seeing the 'TRUTH' and KNOWING its REAL.
One thing i can be sure of, and that is.. i have suffered trauma in my life (much like many i suppose) and i took a few years out to heal myself 5 to be exact, (yes i did need it)
I am nonjudgmental totally peace loving and suffer no ill will, negitives nor insecurities, but i've been left with this heightened 'thing', i say heightened because i believe it has always been there.. but never to this extreme clear perception.
The best way i can describe this in a metaphor would be... As if you are sitting way up high on a tall building looking down on everyone just going about their normal day-to-day life, totally oblivious!! totally clueless!! just small mindingly concentrating on the synthetics of life, i.e what the rush hour traffic will be like this evening, and what to cook for Tea tonight.. clutching on like dear life to magazines of celebs caught without their make-up blah blah blah..
I feel so detached and not apart of it, despite accepting and living amongst it as best i can, but deep down im really in my own bubble, in fact.. well i know i am, i just manage to go through life in stealth mode to enable myself to fit in, as best i can
I know... that should i think to hard about it, i could really send myself into despair, so i do not, but the reminence has changed my insight and how i view things,
and that is something i cannot change, partly because this 'bigger picture' that i now know, wont allow me too. because i KNOW it to be real, and it's better, and you don't diverse from something that is better. (how fuked-up am i sounding right now?)
Its almost like i've been picked up and placed in a foreign speaking country, as if someone had picked up my world and shook it like a snowstorm in a bubble!! and the world as i knew it before is all just bullshit in comparison...
i'm left feeling like.. someone has taken something from me, like a kind of innocence in a way, i feel cheated, 'why cant i just be like them!' just going about 'normal shit,' totally oblivious!! i know im NOT crazy, but this 'sense like' is so heightened, is almost as if it could be.. is it a phenomenon? is this how mediums and psychics feel? it's form is very 'prophet' like to me, (tho im by no means saying i am 1, thats just ridiculous)
what ever it is, gift - insight - intuition - curse.. i don't care, its not unique.. its lonely..
i'm too young for this shit!!
yeah deep i know but please if anyone does relate to any of this, i would be so happy to know im not alone here..