Happiness: From good, to proud, to happy | Page 2 | INFJ Forum

Happiness: From good, to proud, to happy

Whole

If you ask a truly happy man what makes him happy, he will most likely tell you about the things that make or have made him happy.

What he won’t tell you is that he has done much good, was proud to have lived and to live now, lived and shared happiness, loved his life like others and had achieved peace.


Being good

You can tell if the things you have done were somehow wrong, some what right and those you didn’t do at all. It leaves you sometimes wondering whether you are a good or a bad person. I think the simplest answer for that question is to ask yourself if you want to be and do good. If not, you aren’t. If you do, you are. I dare to say that you know if the things you do are good or bad, you just need to find the will to change, to be better. Judging yourself in bad just like you would appreciate yourself in good, will always improve you. It shouldn’t be that serious though, improving. You will eventually accept the life you have lived this far, and the now that you live in.

What helps in being good and staying that way is to first respect people as people, love them and don’t judge or measure them for their actions or being. Understanding that people have become what they are due to the circumstances they have been living in is the key to respecting them. Not all are born the same way, everyone feels and acts different. We are all human beings after all just like you are.

The bad and the good in your past effects your behavior, your thoughts and feelings. Previous experiences and the things that have repeatedly happened in your life tend to change the way you think. You start expecting the same outcomes as you have received before. You think you know what is going to happen. This is imagination combined with logical conclusions and the reason you make these things up is to protect yourself from the emotions you received then. A mind is like a shell, it’s never truly open. Every emotion, impulse, thought has their own source, asking for help to find them and to seek for people you can trust on is a good idea, be among people you admire, the people you can love and open up if you want help. Keep asking yourself if these are the ways you want to feel. You will eventually answer yourself that it most definitely is not no matter how difficult it might feel like. Trust yourself enough to be able to change in any way you want. The people who don't understand why you act, are and think the way you do can call you whatever they want. At that point your faith in yourself is always tested, life will test you. Just believe in change and that people can understand you and love you. If you don't, no professional can ever be able to help you in any way. Accept your feelings, good and bad, feel them, change them if you need to, and then you know who you can be, who you really are.


Having pride

Might sound a bit arrogant, or at least it did to me for a long time. To me it means that you appreciate yourself as you are, what you have done, what you have become, what you have achieved, the whole shebang that is called your life. When you can find pride in your life, you have found the key to happiness. You have the courage to be yourself.

You can't be proud of everything you have done and actually you never should be nor try to be. The thing you need to know about your actions is that you couldn't have done it any other way then. Not what you are, because you get wiser every time you do wrong. Memorizing and noticing all those things is the difficult part. If you do your best to improve, it will be something for you to always be proud of.

There is no luck. There are good and bad things in life and the rate of their occurrence is unknown. This creates the excitement of life too, so it's something to be very glad about. All you need to do to handle this excitement is to be ready for it. What makes you feel ready is courage, knowing that you can survive anything. Courage is found eventually through the realization of your ability to adapt. You have to face every fear you have and know that they were purely imaginary all along to find this courage.


Living happy

Now that you are, you want to be the best you can be and appreciate the life and others that has been given, be proud and to do good, I think you should just do, be everything you can be. I think this is the only way to understand what you truly are, what makes you proud to have lived, to be and have been you. Not like everyone else, but like you, but as different as everyone elses.

Destiny is something that you make for yourself eventually when you know what you can do, and feel like you must do because of your intuition. No one can tell what your destiny is, and never you should let them. The emotion you need to find in yourself and embrace is intuition, and to trust it above anything else.

You aren't alone. You will never be if you don't want to.

People will understand. Learn how to explain. To love. To be happy, to do good and to be at peace.


Love

Love. I believe there is not a single soul on earth who doesn’t or hasn’t felt love. What is it then? Has your love drained and replenished over time? Has anyone helped you even though you hurt them? Have you helped back? That is love. Forgiveness, sacrifice, you name it. It’s a feeling we depend on. You’ll know when you’re all alone without it. You have got the feeling at some point. It’s like a rollercoaster with it’s ups and downs but it doesn’t end.

Someone told me once that love is a sacrifice. What’s the cost? It has no limits. Ultimately, you would do anything. So much that it hurts but you’d ignore the pain. Love is to give away all that matters if needed.

On the other hand when you learn to love every soul, new born child, and people as they are you can drown in it. Be your own best friend and learn to love that friend in you, then you can treat others in the way you treat yourself. You begin to notice the things you do to yourself, and you notice that you do the same things towards others. Everyone has their own reflection.


Being at peace

What is peace? It is a state of mind. Where you know you can trust the people you live with, where and how you are. Thinking about the future sometimes can tremble that peace. No matter if you had optimistic or pessimistic thoughts about it, it most often isn’t how it happens. One of my favorite quotes is from Albert Einstein who said that “Don’t worry about the future, it will come soon enough”.

If you do know how to love, you can trust. And if you love the people wherever you go, you can trust everyone. There’s no reason to worry if you do good, are proud, happy and love while remaining a peaceful person. People like people like that. And even if they wouldn’t, stay remorseful to yourself and others. Forgive, let go and learn.


-Erkki Rainamo

Wow, I see that you've been producing new writing! Or is it from back in the day?

Give us some background! :wink:
 
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Wow, I see that you've been producing new writing! Or is it from back in the day?

Give us some background! :wink:
Haha! Piece by piece my friend

I made it after the one woman I truly love. I was at peace, but now I know there's life after this too. I think I'm free now. I achieved all I wanted and still, that isn't enough. Now I know there's so much more to do.
 
Whole

If you ask a truly happy man what makes him happy, he will most likely tell you about the things that make or have made him happy.

What he won’t tell you is that he has done much good, was proud to have lived and to live now, lived and shared happiness, loved his life like others and had achieved peace.


Being good

You can tell if the things you have done were somehow wrong, some what right and those you didn’t do at all. It leaves you sometimes wondering whether you are a good or a bad person. I think the simplest answer for that question is to ask yourself if you want to be and do good. If not, you aren’t. If you do, you are. I dare to say that you know if the things you do are good or bad, you just need to find the will to change, to be better. Judging yourself in bad just like you would appreciate yourself in good, will always improve you. It shouldn’t be that serious though, improving. You will eventually accept the life you have lived this far, and the now that you live in.

What helps in being good and staying that way is to first respect people as people, love them and don’t judge or measure them for their actions or being. Understanding that people have become what they are due to the circumstances they have been living in is the key to respecting them. Not all are born the same way, everyone feels and acts different. We are all human beings after all just like you are.

The bad and the good in your past effects your behavior, your thoughts and feelings. Previous experiences and the things that have repeatedly happened in your life tend to change the way you think. You start expecting the same outcomes as you have received before. You think you know what is going to happen. This is imagination combined with logical conclusions and the reason you make these things up is to protect yourself from the emotions you received then. A mind is like a shell, it’s never truly open. Every emotion, impulse, thought has their own source, asking for help to find them and to seek for people you can trust on is a good idea, be among people you admire, the people you can love and open up if you want help. Keep asking yourself if these are the ways you want to feel. You will eventually answer yourself that it most definitely is not no matter how difficult it might feel like. Trust yourself enough to be able to change in any way you want. The people who don't understand why you act, are and think the way you do can call you whatever they want. At that point your faith in yourself is always tested, life will test you. Just believe in change and that people can understand you and love you. If you don't, no professional can ever be able to help you in any way. Accept your feelings, good and bad, feel them, change them if you need to, and then you know who you can be, who you really are.


Having pride

Might sound a bit arrogant, or at least it did to me for a long time. To me it means that you appreciate yourself as you are, what you have done, what you have become, what you have achieved, the whole shebang that is called your life. When you can find pride in your life, you have found the key to happiness. You have the courage to be yourself.

You can't be proud of everything you have done and actually you never should be nor try to be. The thing you need to know about your actions is that you couldn't have done it any other way then. Not what you are, because you get wiser every time you do wrong. Memorizing and noticing all those things is the difficult part. If you do your best to improve, it will be something for you to always be proud of.

There is no luck. There are good and bad things in life and the rate of their occurrence is unknown. This creates the excitement of life too, so it's something to be very glad about. All you need to do to handle this excitement is to be ready for it. What makes you feel ready is courage, knowing that you can survive anything. Courage is found eventually through the realization of your ability to adapt. You have to face every fear you have and know that they were purely imaginary all along to find this courage.


Living happy

Now that you are, you want to be the best you can be and appreciate the life and others that has been given, be proud and to do good, I think you should just do, be everything you can be. I think this is the only way to understand what you truly are, what makes you proud to have lived, to be and have been you. Not like everyone else, but like you, but as different as everyone elses.

Destiny is something that you make for yourself eventually when you know what you can do, and feel like you must do because of your intuition. No one can tell what your destiny is, and never you should let them. The emotion you need to find in yourself and embrace is intuition, and to trust it above anything else.

You aren't alone. You will never be if you don't want to.

People will understand. Learn how to explain. To love. To be happy, to do good and to be at peace.


Love

Love. I believe there is not a single soul on earth who doesn’t or hasn’t felt love. What is it then? Has your love drained and replenished over time? Has anyone helped you even though you hurt them? Have you helped back? That is love. Forgiveness, sacrifice, you name it. It’s a feeling we depend on. You’ll know when you’re all alone without it. You have got the feeling at some point. It’s like a rollercoaster with it’s ups and downs but it doesn’t end.

Someone told me once that love is a sacrifice. What’s the cost? It has no limits. Ultimately, you would do anything. So much that it hurts but you’d ignore the pain. Love is to give away all that matters if needed.

On the other hand when you learn to love every soul, new born child, and people as they are you can drown in it. Be your own best friend and learn to love that friend in you, then you can treat others in the way you treat yourself. You begin to notice the things you do to yourself, and you notice that you do the same things towards others. Everyone has their own reflection.


Being at peace

What is peace? It is a state of mind. Where you know you can trust the people you live with, where and how you are. Thinking about the future sometimes can tremble that peace. No matter if you had optimistic or pessimistic thoughts about it, it most often isn’t how it happens. One of my favorite quotes is from Albert Einstein who said that “Don’t worry about the future, it will come soon enough”.

If you do know how to love, you can trust. And if you love the people wherever you go, you can trust everyone. There’s no reason to worry if you do good, are proud, happy and love while remaining a peaceful person. People like people like that. And even if they wouldn’t, stay remorseful to yourself and others. Forgive, let go and learn.


-Erkki Rainamo

I love this. :<3:
 
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@Disguised is a mix between gifted ethical writer and prophet :wink:

05d.jpg
 
Feels good though, like the only way to live doesn't it? Honesty I think is one of the most difficult virtues to maintain, and least valued virtue there is. I have criticized all of my bosses and their manners of leading due to this, most likely seeming as a smart-ass at the same time. I find myself in these clothing issues conversations sometimes with my friends too. A friend asked me once what he liked about his "milano designer leather jacket" and I laughed my ass off telling him that there sure was better ways to spend that money. He wasn't quite fond of it, but the others laughed aloud for a while saying "well that sure was honest". So I feel like no matter how blunt it seems it must be told. Did you at any point use lying as the means for survival?


So late night I read about this Saint Augustine character and I was intrigued by how it did resemble my ways of thought in quite the few manners (also saw some signs while reading the wikipedia article to keep me interested I suppose :D). I sort of despise religion as a whole. I think when a person will lean on to religion for hope and faith, there is much the others around that person could do more than religion itself. The only thing there is to me is faith in yourself. ¨


I will to try keep this short as earlier in this post I asked @SeekerSeeking if he/she had used lies as the means for survival. I based most of my "evil" traits in me for that exact reason which lead me to believe it was quite alright I did so. My childhood depended on it, as the master manipulator that my father was needed to be defeated in his own game. As I felt love that was fake, instead it was for the means to manipulate more. I then offered empathy that was fake. We eventually got to the point of debating as I was older and moved away. Same goes with some of my friends, jobs and relationships as I felt already that survival was so much easier this way. No need to express everything I had to say as they seemed way too blunt. And my father left me the feeling anyways of "how could I possibly know better?" the logic smart-ass that he himself was.

So we move a couple years forward again in history and I'm starting to feel like I can use this to create any persona I want to. Like if some situations needed a douchebag, a leader, a friend, a friend in con, a smart-ass, a teacher anything I could do it. And to great success I used this in various situations at school, in jobs and with people. Or so I felt like. I fit the normal perception for once in my life that I felt like I could belong after all.

Love towards my old self was my breaking point. I had me always in there anyways, I just didn't want to show it to anyone. My first crush which I still adore very much came to the party I held at my place as I moved for the first time by myself. She was the love of my life I felt like after all, that nothing else would matter if I only had her. So she appeared and it felt like she belonged with me and my friends. It felt so unreal, yet so real that my friends that I had been hiding and keeping up with lies were actually the best company she claimed to be with in a long time. My habits of doing a bunch of drugs with them felt too much of a junkie label to me. The night went on and we had one of the best days in my life. We danced and danced and gazed to each other like there should be no tomorrow without this. She started crying. Like something wasn't right. She knew I wasn't like this. She knew me as the type to retract to art in classes, listening to different kind of music than most, the clothes had changed, the look, everything that there was before. I was cocky I could say. Suddenly she left from the bar and I chased her down. She didn't say nothing as I pushed her to the wall and asked her "what did I do?", just cried. She looked at me for a second and then to her feet. I lifted her chin, swept the tears away and said that "Whatever it is, don't cry for me" which she answered that "You are unresistable. I can't do this". I figured as she'd been in a long-term relationship this is the worst time ever for this, but I had to try atleast. There was no holding back anymore. I told her that she would be the one I would leave anyone for. For that dream was something that saved me from killing myself quite a few times. I knew it was possible. That night ended up in my bed and she left in the morning and I wasn't sure why. "I did everything right didn't I" I asked myself. I couldn't figure it out why she would not meet with me again. I had told her I had waited for her to show up for five years after all and she must have known how that night felt like to me.

The realization that came from this was that the dream was the hugest lie of my life that I had been living for. I lost ground, hope and faith and everything as I she was gone again. She was the reason I held my shit together for so long wishing that one day she will see me in my potential that was now based in something so ingenuine. I thought that all the stuff and all the possibilities I now had were for her. I had my identity questioned to the point of a life threatening crisis. I didn't chase her anymore after I received the last text from her saying that "I'm moving, have a good summer.". I got passive-aggressively angry and tried to tell myself things that "well she wasn't worth it anyways". Hurts even to write that stuff but after a while it turned to saying "if I really loved her I can let her go as well". That summer, after letting go, was the time I started to write this happiness thing. I knew I had always been depressed, and the joy I felt was so minimal that it was of no use anymore. I had to figure out what happiness was to live. I had my best job then luckily in which there was no need for a fake persona. There was this one guy who had that, and he was not liked that much and was left unanswered with his lies in the coffee room. His example was a memory of my actions. My oldest friends then used to accompany me all the time and it kept me wondering why. I had been real to these few people more than to anyone, with my feelings and thoughts. They valued me no matter what I did and were my pillar to lean on when needed. I had been focusing on the bad sides of me for so long that I didn't think there was any good in me left. They kept telling me things that they valued in me and I started to trust that perspective. I wrote this in a couple of days that summer. I had to. The realizations came to me the more I thought about the subject, and I had to be proud of something in my life. Most of what I did was to serve my own purposes and I felt the pointlessness of it, as it simply meant nothing anymore. What purpose would my life serve if I kept on this way? I didn't have a dream of the future like people usually do at a young age, being an astronaut or a fireman and such. I got depressed at 4 years old when I knew that my life in an universal scale is like a poo of a fly. I had reached something that had always seemed impossible to me. To be happy.

*I won't read this through as I feel like it'll take more time than it will do any good. It's good enough this time.

*edit* Okey I had to fix some irritating typos

Thank you for sharing this personal story. I might still get to gribs with it in ways, but it already taught me a lot, which I couldnt or cant quite put in words now. A question popped up in my mind though. Stupid what-if one though. Here it goes: Do you think you could have reached that turning point (at this point) without the experience and illusion about that girl? A dream that kept you alive, but also in limbo of sorts.
 
Thank you for sharing this personal story. I might still get to gribs with it in ways, but it already taught me a lot, which I couldnt or cant quite put in words now. A question popped up in my mind though. Stupid what-if one though. Here it goes: Do you think you could have reached that turning point (at this point) without the experience and illusion about that girl? A dream that kept you alive, but also in limbo of sorts.
Good question, and most surely not. It was a wake up call of sorts. And now the bell rings yet again. I guess I'm just too tired to wake up. I seem to follow a road to nowhere with paths that are intriguing and exciting, but never going to a destination I'd want.
 
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Time to figure out what/where you want to be and only then start walking instead of drifting along.

But who am I kidding? I have the same work still to do.

You are allowed to try out things or take a detour so long as you always find your path again. And considering how far you've come already I believe you will.
 
I just quit selling Ferrari's and other pricey toys. One hell of a ride it was. I'm not moving my ass for no dime anymore. I'll do what makes me happy.
 
I'll do what makes me happy.

Atta tiger. Great mindset there.

The way I see it, life is short; so you better make the most of it and do what you love with no regrets. Don't let anyone or society dictate what you should or should not do. Live your life and fulfill your dreams.
 
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