Does love remain the same throughout the years or decades? | INFJ Forum

Does love remain the same throughout the years or decades?

Gaze

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I've noticed that people often expect the love and passion they feel for someone to last throughout the years or decades of a relationship. Of course, you can love someone until the end of your relationship or life but will you feel the same about them later on as you did early in the relationship? How realistic is it to expect to have the same intense feelings of love and passion for someone at 45 or 65 as you would at 25 or 35? thoughts? One of the reasons this topic came to mind are hearing stories of separations between people who've been together for 20+ years who met when they were much younger. These people love each other but can they be expected to care in the same way today as they did when they first met?
 
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I think the intensity of romantic feelings ebs and flows but if both people are committed to nurturing the relationship, it can always come back. But I recognize this as a minority opinion today. :(
 
I think you can love someone for the rest of your life without end but I wonder if couples sometimes put too much value in this idea that because they no longer feel the same as they did when they first met, that somehow, it's not worth it anymore or that since the love is not the same, that it isn't as meaningful to continue building the relationship.
 
I think you can love someone for the rest of your life without end but I wonder if couples sometimes put too much value in this idea that because they no longer feel the same as they did when they first met, that somehow, it's not worth it anymore or that since the love is not the same, that it isn't as meaningful to continue building the relationship.


If you really love someone, you will find a way. Unfortunately I already once failed to find that way. Do I believe it was meant it be no, did it suck going all out and failing. I felt like Dante after he reached the belly of all the damned. But I did not convince her and the devil had his victory.
 
When we hold on to an image of perfect love, it seems in some cases to do more harm than good, because rather than seeing love as developing and in process, we see it as final. We often define it in black and white terms such as "I either love or I don't" or we assume that love is static rather than fluid. I think the concept of love as evolving aligns with the view of love as fluid where you see ebbs and flows in the progression of feelings over a period of time, instead of assuming that feelings must stay exactly the same forever.
 
I think once you fall in love with someone, it doesn't ever truly go away. There's a depth of feeling there that takes a hold of you and because the emotion itself is so strong, you cannot separate yourself from it because your relationship with that person makes you grow significantly as a person. The expression of that love, however, is another matter entirely. I think that definitely changes with the years and the circumstances and what it is that the people in the relationship go through together.
 
I think once you fall in love with someone, it doesn't ever truly go away. There's a depth of feeling there that takes a hold of you and because the emotion itself is so strong, you cannot separate yourself from it because your relationship with that person makes you grow significantly as a person. The expression of that love, however, is another matter entirely. I think that definitely changes with the years and the circumstances and what it is that the people in the relationship go through together.

So there are bumps and hiccups most likely during the relationship your saying?
 
So there are bumps and hiccups most likely during the relationship your saying?

There are bumps and hiccups during any relationship. You work through them or you don't. Most people, when they truly love their partner, are willing to do everything in their power to make it work.

However, sometimes it just doesn't.

In order to have a successful relationship, love by itself is not enough. You still have to be compatible. Love may not change over the years, but a couple's compatibility certainly might.
 
I think it changes. And perhaps we never quite understand ourselves, the person we love or the feeling of love itself enough to make definite comparisons.
 
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title reminds me of this track:

[video=youtube;No8e0OE9QAU]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=No8e0OE9QAU[/video]
 
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i think love changes, or rather adapts, to the relationship over time.
 
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