Dating another INFJ | INFJ Forum

Dating another INFJ

Discussion in 'The INFJ Typology' started by rbecca23, May 20, 2010.

Share This Page

Watchers:
This thread is being watched by 3 users.
More threads by rbecca23
  1. rbecca23

    rbecca23 Regular Poster

    Joined:
    May 17, 2010
    Threads:
    6
    Messages:
    84
    Likes Received:
    4
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    How many of you have dated another INFJ?

    I had a curious experience(s). When I first discovered that I was an INFJ, I was fascinated with finding out what my close relations were, as well. Interestingly enough, I discovered that my closest friends were at least INs. Upon further research and questioning, my even more significant relationships were INFJs, including my boyfriend of two years. What I found even more interesting was that my boyfriend had formed close attachments with my family members and friends who were also INFJs. And the bonds created have outlived my relationship with him.

    On top of that, I learned that both my parents are INFJs, and their relationship is one that I'm confident will stand the test of time. They're ga-ga for each other.

    Have you noticed this pattern in your lives? People bonding more strongly with other INs and INFJs? Rather than the 'intended' extroverts. Do you think it's because we feel less inclined to share our feelings with someone who's seemingly more 'open' about their own?

    How did your relationships and friendships turn out?
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  2. under skies

    under skies Community Member

    Joined:
    Jan 1, 2010
    Threads:
    1
    Messages:
    637
    Likes Received:
    107
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFP
    Enneagram:
    4w5
    Until I joined this forum, I'd never known any other INFJs very well, so I'm sorry to say that I really can't help you much from personal experience.

    You may be interested in one of these threads, though:

    INFJ Male/INFJ Female
    INFJ+INFJ?

    There are more, if you don't mind plowing through the search pages.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  3. WaeV

    WaeV Community Member

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2009
    Threads:
    15
    Messages:
    242
    Likes Received:
    20
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    -+/=
    Enneagram:
    ...
    A great many of my friends are INs. I had a relationship with an INFJ, but I'm hesitant to draw any conclusions about type interactions from that. I'm INTJ anyways, so maybe it doesn't matter, but most human relationships are too complex to completely categorize with typology.

    I find that with INs I can speak more freely without having to translate my thought patterns (N), plus they innately understand alone-time and such. In the relationship I would say... nahh, there's really not much I can extrapolate. I remember thinking that it would be nice if she was more extraverted than I, because as comfortable as it is to be in private, there are also lots of exciting things in the world. Sometimes it takes an extraverted person to drag you out and make you enjoy them.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  4. Tamagochi

    Tamagochi Sushi Destroyer
    Donor

    Joined:
    May 18, 2009
    Threads:
    15
    Messages:
    922
    Likes Received:
    364
    Trophy Points:
    622
    Location:
    Lithuania
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Wow, it must have been an amazing experience to have both of your parents the same type as you. I was not that lucky. Though I would guess that you would like to seek something new for you love-life.

    I'm most certainly attracted to other INFJs in some weird spiritual ways and feel very comfortable in the company of any N's. Similarities do attract.
     
  5. Questingpoet

    Questingpoet Not Afraid to Use His Beard
    Donor

    Joined:
    Sep 11, 2009
    Threads:
    222
    Messages:
    5,733
    Featured Threads:
    1
    Likes Received:
    941
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Enneagram:
    4w5
    I only know of two for sure that I have met irl (not including the forum members I have met). Another person might have been, but it was years ago. That's a lot of INFJ's around you for such a rare type. How did you type them? Did they all take the test?
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  6. Ergo Christobal

    Ergo Christobal Talking Lightbulb
    Donor

    Joined:
    May 8, 2010
    Threads:
    26
    Messages:
    393
    Likes Received:
    43
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    I didn't not known the MBTI test before stopped dating. I can tell that most of my exes were E---'s. I have made some of my current friends take it, and one of my closest friends is an ENTP. She's dating another friend of mine, an ISTJ. Many of my friends are EN--'s, and we get along swimmingly.

    I'm the only INFJ in our little group, and unanimously voted as the weirdest.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #6 Ergo Christobal, May 20, 2010
    Last edited: May 20, 2010
  7. Questingpoet

    Questingpoet Not Afraid to Use His Beard
    Donor

    Joined:
    Sep 11, 2009
    Threads:
    222
    Messages:
    5,733
    Featured Threads:
    1
    Likes Received:
    941
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Enneagram:
    4w5
    We are quite different TC. If that make us weird--so be it. Most people can't handle different, that's why they create stereotypes. And by the way TC, O.C. Scott---INFJ!
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  8. That Girl

    That Girl Do you have my answers?
    Donor

    Joined:
    Apr 27, 2010
    Threads:
    29
    Messages:
    1,634
    Likes Received:
    270
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INTJ
    I think most of my friends are extroverted. They're loud. I don't have a problem with it though. Andrew and I just get labeled as weirdos for wanting to be home half the time. They tease us but it's all in good fun. I think it depends on how accepting the people you know are of you as an individual regardless of typing. If they look at you and say "yes, that's my friend," and treat you as such then it should be at least a tolerable friendship (you know, the kind that they're in the group but you mostly talk to them about surface subjects).
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  9. Ergo Christobal

    Ergo Christobal Talking Lightbulb
    Donor

    Joined:
    May 8, 2010
    Threads:
    26
    Messages:
    393
    Likes Received:
    43
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    I actually like being the weird one. It's like I'm the most interesting person of our group. I've always been called weird, and eventually I realized that normal is a paradox, and an unattainable state. Even if it were possible, it's not a place anyone really wants to be.

    Plus, being weird is more fun!

    Also, when I found out Card was an INFJ I did a little happy dance. :D
    It's pretty cool that Mother Teresa and ML King are in there too ;)
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  10. Questingpoet

    Questingpoet Not Afraid to Use His Beard
    Donor

    Joined:
    Sep 11, 2009
    Threads:
    222
    Messages:
    5,733
    Featured Threads:
    1
    Likes Received:
    941
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Enneagram:
    4w5
    Yeah, I typed OC Scott myself first, and then saw him on a list somewhere. But if you read his stuff it's real obvious, at least to me it is. Another one who I think is, but I haven't looked up, is Ursula LeGuin (The Earthsea Trilogy), her books scream INFJ to me just like Scott's did.

    Ok, enough derailing. Back to dating INFJ's, sorry..........
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  11. OP
    rbecca23

    rbecca23 Regular Poster

    Joined:
    May 17, 2010
    Threads:
    6
    Messages:
    84
    Likes Received:
    4
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Yes. I had them all take a test online. Sent out a Facebook Thread. The results ran as such:

    3 family members.
    4 of my closest friends.

    I had a theory that birds of a feather flock together in this case... But, maybe not.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  12. OP
    rbecca23

    rbecca23 Regular Poster

    Joined:
    May 17, 2010
    Threads:
    6
    Messages:
    84
    Likes Received:
    4
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    I read somewhere that Christ was an INFJ.

    Supposing that not a lot of my friends are extroverts, what does that say about me? Is it for me to be accepting, or for those around me to be more accepting. Or is it relative?

    After dating an INFJ for 3 years, I realize that I long for a more openly passionate person... who doesn't require an expert locksmith to get into their thoughts.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  13. The Jester

    [​IMG]

    Uploaded with ImageShack.us

    Sounds more like an ESTP to me.

    Anyway, I seem to attract introverts AND extraverts.
    I like them all. Any type is awesome, they just need to be stable.
    Like, having some empathy and all, but still be able to think rationally.
     
  14. Grey Wolf

    Grey Wolf Airborne all the way!

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2009
    Threads:
    90
    Messages:
    1,769
    Likes Received:
    135
    Trophy Points:
    622
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Enneagram:
    no idea
    I agree! I'm also pretty much unanimously voted as the most weird in all my groups ;)

    I love being called that. you get to do so much more and can ignore conventions without serious reprecussions MUAHAHAHAH :m027:
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  15. Faye

    Faye ^_^
    Staff Member Administrator

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2009
    Threads:
    311
    Messages:
    7,276
    Featured Threads:
    4
    Likes Received:
    4,607
    Trophy Points:
    892
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Gridania
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Enneagram:
    4w5
    That is just freakishly rare; I've never heard of or seen such a thing, and I think your experience is very unique. It makes me wonder if people have been typed correctly. Also, this test is 1000x better than any facebook test: http://similarminds.com/jung.html

    especially the one that thinks Oprah is INFJ.
     
  16. Jonathan

    Jonathan Community Member

    Joined:
    May 4, 2010
    Threads:
    9
    Messages:
    544
    Likes Received:
    169
    Trophy Points:
    190
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Canada
    MBTI:
    INFJ (IEI)
    Enneagram:
    4w5 so/sx
    I think that it's relative, depending on who you're most comfortable around. For me, most of my friends are introverts because extroverts drain me easily and are overpowering at times. It's not that I'm not willing to accept them, but they just aren't people I'd prefer to spend a lot of time with. I prefer introverts becauce they tend to be easier for me to have conversations with. I'm usually never on the same page as an extrovert for very long. If people can't understand eachother, I doubt the amount of acceptance you have for eachother will really make much of a difference.

    Introverts can be openly passionate, but I think it has to do with their confidence and how much they trust the person they're talking to, especially the INF's.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  17. OP
    rbecca23

    rbecca23 Regular Poster

    Joined:
    May 17, 2010
    Threads:
    6
    Messages:
    84
    Likes Received:
    4
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Ha ha. The test wasn't off of Facebook, but you do have a point. I find that my introverted relationships are deep and intimate.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  18. OP
    rbecca23

    rbecca23 Regular Poster

    Joined:
    May 17, 2010
    Threads:
    6
    Messages:
    84
    Likes Received:
    4
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Now that I think about it, I am more comfortable around introverts. I trust them on a more spiritual/intellectual level.
    Extroverts intimidate me, overwhelm me at times.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
Loading...

Share This Page