Cultivating Compassion
- Thread starter Trifoilum
- Start date
Somewhat of a footnote;
The first title was 'Cultivating Sympathy'. I was going to divide between sympathy and empathy.
But : a) why bother separating them; purge them instead? And, b) I don't know about others, but personally sympathy by itself is relatively easy to 'fake it till you make it', because it can be seen in a shallow way of matter.
So...compassion it is.
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@bickelz : true, but I would think there's a how..
[MENTION=751]Peppermint[/MENTION] : speaking from personal PoV; I would say it wasn't enough. IME, at the very best it's a motive. At the very least, it's merely an observation. (But if it does do enough for you, I'm more than glad.)
The first title was 'Cultivating Sympathy'. I was going to divide between sympathy and empathy.
But : a) why bother separating them; purge them instead? And, b) I don't know about others, but personally sympathy by itself is relatively easy to 'fake it till you make it', because it can be seen in a shallow way of matter.
So...compassion it is.
==
@bickelz : true, but I would think there's a how..
[MENTION=751]Peppermint[/MENTION] : speaking from personal PoV; I would say it wasn't enough. IME, at the very best it's a motive. At the very least, it's merely an observation. (But if it does do enough for you, I'm more than glad.)
This too for me, mostly. I do think that compassion is something that you just have in many cases. But it can be worked on... it's just a matter of being mindful of other people.. seeing things from another person's point of view, asking and genuinely caring about how someone feels, being kind and generous, etc.
I'm naturally that way, but as Peppermint said, it's a matter of willingly seeking to seek and understand the other person's perspective.
I don't think compassion involves relieving others from suffering, I think it only acknowledges and understands the pain of others.
For example, my younger brother is about to enter middle school. I'm compassionate towards the fact of what awaits him in that period. Relieving him from it would encompass me interfering with his development which may be detrimental in the bigger picture.
Of course, compassion may lead towards action, especially when there's abuse involved and exploitation.
The Oxford Dictionary supports your meaning.
Personally, I interpret your definition as empathy or even sympathy. If there is no desire to relieve suffering then as far as I'm concerned it is not compassion. It is not necessary to actually relieve pain. I acknowledge my previous sentence was deficient in not distinguishing. No two words in English supposedly are exactly synonymous. Therefore, empathy < sympathy < compassion. However, this is a personal interpretation.
Compassion actually starts with "I'm not so sure I want to be understanding or giving but for some reason, I'd like to give you a chance or a second chance" or "I think you should have this or need this more than I do so you should have it."
In other words, it's not always based entirely in an unselfish, perfectly humble feeling. Sometimes, it's spontaneous.
In other words, it's not always based entirely in an unselfish, perfectly humble feeling. Sometimes, it's spontaneous.
Actually I take back what I said [MENTION=3710]kiu[/MENTION]. I was thinking, compassion does involve action, but my problem was that I was confusing non-action as no action. Sometimes the best thing to do in a situation is not to do anything, but this decision comes from a much higher perspective that this non-action will reap into a positive outcome in the future.
It still involves doing, but in a way that still respects the integrity of the free will of others. Not interfering can sometimes be the greatest act of compassion one can show to others.
I think the root of this problem is probably religious or philosophical. Christian compassion as I understand it requires a desire to relieve suffering through acts of mercy, forgiveness and generosity. In Eastern philosophies I don't believe compassion goes beyond understanding pain. Correct me if I am wrong.
Both of which can be compassionate acts. I agree that mercy, forgiveness and generosity can be used for selfish reasons. However, if selfishness is involved the acts cease to be compassionate.
This is mercy or possibly even forgiveness. I suppose the distinction is made based on whether you grant the second chance from a position of "power over" or "personal power".
This is generosity.
Both of which can be compassionate acts. I agree that mercy, forgiveness and generosity can be used for selfish reasons. However, if selfishness is involved the acts cease to be compassionate.
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You mean when you see a kid about to get hit by a car, and you push the kid to the side and you end up the one getting hit?
If so, I agree.
What do you agree with here? Is it that the scenario is not unselfish? I would think it is unselfish, at least on the surface. Or is it that the choice was spontaneous? It would be. However, if there is no room to think and the action is simply reflexive than how can the act be compassionate? There must be room for reflection, it seems to me.
The latter: that the choice was spontaneous.
I'm guessing that the reflection took place before the incident when you came to the conclusion that a child's life is more important than your own. You are compassionate that you don't want to see that child suffering, and it may not be only children but anyone who may be in a threat. On the other hand, I can see how this can be problematic when you don't share the same perception, and in that case, you may think it twice before attempting to rescue him.
However, when you are fixed on a specific mindset(in this case, "I don't want to see a child suffering"), and you are 100 percent certain on your resolve, whatever the situation that you perceive as a threat to that child, your instinct is going to be to save him.
Go spend a week homeless on the street, then move to a third world country and stay there for a month or more. Then come back to the U.S. and realize how great your life is.
Unfortunately realizing how great your life is will not change the life of those living in third world countries or those who are homeless. The real compassionate would live in those places permanently and do all they can to mitigate their suffering.
Wasn't that what Jesus did? He could've stayed in heaven, but he chose to come to this shit hole and do something about it. At least that's how the bible portrays him as.
compassion isn't an action, it's an emotional response to the suffering of others. The best way to increase your sense of compassion is to live in the suffering of others and then return to your normal life. Coming out of the suffering will ultimately change you perspective on the life and luxuries you have.
After that it's up to the individual to act on their new perspective and compassion.