Connecting with people on Facebook | INFJ Forum

Connecting with people on Facebook

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by Gaze, Aug 13, 2010.

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  1. Gaze

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    I know everyone uses Facebook for different reasons.


    Does connecting with people from the past on Facebook change how you see or relate to your friends or connections?




    What have you learned or how does reconnecting with someone affect your sense of people and relationships?
     
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    #1 Gaze, Aug 13, 2010
    Last edited: Aug 13, 2010
  2. Ria

    Ria Snow White over the ocean

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    I'm totally hidden on facebook and cannot be found on any search.

    I think that for myself, I have used it for connecting with one or two old friends, but that's about it. I do see the difference in my pattern with how I interract less with the old friends though. Many of my facebook friends are from here on the forum or family members in Europe. I interract with the forum friends mostly, but then again, I rarely use facebook now.
     
  3. invisible

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    i quit facebook. i hated it. to a very large extent the interaction level seems shallow to me. i repeatedly saw people i want to highschool with becoming "friends" when i knew how deeply one of them disliked the other and i decided that i would rather not be reminded that they have no integrity. when people wouldn't respond to private messages that i spent time composing but just demanded that i put my wall back up, i started to wonder how many friendships i had on there had become for display purposes only. and i don't know where to start on events invitations.. anyway my real friends text or email me and we actually see one another. they can give me all their gossip and news when we catch up, i don't need to read it on their wall. as for the rest bleeeeeccch
     
  4. OP
    Gaze

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    Yeah, i'm on it, but i don't use it very much. And I don't care for having many friends because it is superficial. I don't like the word "friends" being used to describe someone who is simply an acquaintance. At one point, i thought the word "buddy" or "contact" would be better. That way we can use the word "friends" for real friends. heh.
     
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  5. invisible

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    i agree with you. "contact" sounds great. i think i wouldn't mind having it for business purposes only, if that could somehow be clear without insulting my "friends".
     
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  6. ~jet

    ~jet Director of Space Exploration

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    Pff you guys... I use facebook a lot. I do limit my friends to people I actually have some acquaintance with, though. Still, its a nice passive way to keep up with people, plus the way it is set up, generally only allowing for 'positive' easy feedback (LIKE) etc, people there have actually been measured to be significantly nicer than on other types of sites where flaming tends to be the rule. Your mileage may vary, but... I just can't give 'em that hard a time =)
     
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  7. invisible

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    considering it's supposed to be a social site, it's incredible how often people can't summon the emotional energy required to press "like". they treat it like some kind of critical measurement rather than acknowledging that you thought enough about them to post something that might interest them. but it's probably just me. so whatever.
     
  8. OP
    Gaze

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    lol. Ok, you're right. It's not fair to describe it so negatively. Everyone uses it differently. :) It's just that when some try to make real connections through the site, they find that the interest is not returned in the same way or it simply becomes superficial. But i guess you could say that about other sites as well. So, that's why there's some frustration.
     
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    #8 Gaze, Aug 13, 2010
    Last edited: Aug 13, 2010
  9. invisible

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    i find that the interest is returned completely, but only on a superficial level. i keep getting contacted by people who want to interact with me, but when i try to interact in a meaningful way, it's like they just disappear. then i'm like "well, alright then, let's forget about it." then a few weeks later i get more of this attempt to connect superficially. and i'm like, wtf, why are you bothering at all?
     
  10. jyrffw54

    jyrffw54 שכינה עוֹלֶה

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    I have friends who go to colleges all over the country, and facebook is a nice way to stay in touch, especially when we don't have the time to call each other. I only add people that I know and are on terms with. Feel free to add me if you wish
     
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  11. beetpoet

    beetpoet Community Member

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    i think it's helpful for people with big families. i have about a hundred cousins, then my own siblings, nieces, nephews etc. i enjoy all of these people but sometimes it's good to just get a glance at their news without needing to call someone and get the whole deal on all the family (i sort of hate the phone).
     
  12. 88keys

    88keys Newbie

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    whoa

    invisible its like you have read my mind....my G...Im not the only one to think these things
     
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  13. Matariki

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    I use face book occasionally.
    I use it to connect with my family and old friends.
     
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  14. the

    the Si master race.
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    I like Facebook just to see how people look now. I dont talk to 99% of the people I am friends with.

    I also have a theory that goes something like the majority of people are most likely to join Facebook when they are

    1 Getting married
    2 Pregnant
    3 Its high school reunion time.

    Facebook also seems like a bored stay at home mom type of website. I am always getting updates that "Jr took a walk in the park today" "I just vacuumed the house, boy am I beat!" "If you love soldiers/Mothers/Fathers/God then repost this in your status."
     
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    #14 the, Aug 13, 2010
    Last edited: Aug 13, 2010
  15. 88chaz88

    88chaz88 Back for a limited time only
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    You forgot the nerds bored at work demographic which makes up a good chunk of my status updates. Me and a few others are constantly posting news, music videos, and generally jeering at each other over it.

    But yes, I get the rest of that crap too.
     
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  16. ~jet

    ~jet Director of Space Exploration

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    Oh sure, I see that. I wasn't trying to use it for ~new~ connections, so I hadn't needed to think of it in that way.
     
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  17. TinyBubbles

    TinyBubbles anarchist

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    actually, i don't use facebook. there are easier ways of contacting people, and i'm way too private to post about my life online :/
     
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  18. dark_angel

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    It is strange...I hated facebook when I first joined...found it so overwhelming and superficial. A new friend nagged for me to go back and now I am enjoying it, I have changed my approach to it...I now see it as having some extroverted fun, my profile is playful and not serious as on here. I keep in touch with friends that have been feeling neglected but keep it at that, online time only and yes it is superficial but it makes them happy. I fill my needs here and with a small circle of friends I see in real life. I see it now as a place to go play when I feel like it.
     
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  19. j e s s i e

    j e s s i e Buried Myself Alive
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    Sometimes I think the only reason I keep my facebook anymore is because I'm nosy. I like seeing what the people I used to hang out with when I was a kid are up to now. I'd say I only have about 2 facebook friends out of the 150 or so I have added that I talk to regularly and could say they're genuinely my friends.

    I have connected with a few people over FB that I normally wouldn't have gotten to contact if not for it, so I enjoy that occasional pleasure. Plus no one I know hangs out on AIM/MSN anymore, only facebook IM. So I stay on just to keep up.
     
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    "here's a picture of the meal i just ate in an outrageously inexpensive michelin star restaurant in japan. i'm obsessed with spanish pork and i want to buy shares in it, i just love spanish pork. stay tuned for more pictures of meals i have eaten and inane babble about what kinds of food i love. unforgettably delicious. i have nothing more meaningful in my life than food and i consider myself a gourmand and i'm very happy that way. i just made reservations at heston blumenthal's fat duck restaurant, bet you can't wait for the pictures of THAT."
     
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