Been there, done that... | INFJ Forum

Been there, done that...

Lerxst

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Jul 3, 2010
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Have you ever "lived" the next few minutes, hours or even years of your life all at once without actually going through the physical aspects of those moments? There are two instances I can think of to describe this with me at least:

I wake up in the morning to the alarm. I lie in bed for a few minutes, during which time I picture taking a shower, washing up, brushing my teeth, getting dressed, etc. and then I actually feel tired and bored before even getting a foot out of the bed. It's like I just lived the next half hour of my life in that 10 second period without having even moved.

The last happened the other day when I was driving by a college and considered going to grad school there. I pictured the type of job I would end up working while there, the apartment I'd rent and pretty much every aspect of my life, good and bad. While driving from one end of town to the other, I had pretty much lived the next 4 years of my life in that scenario, even if it wasn't entirely accurate.

I'm trying to figure out exactly what parts of my personality allow instances like that to take hold... In a lot of ways, it's really depressing and it starts me down the path of "why bother" thoughts.
 
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I am CONSTANTLY, CONSTANTLY doing this -- this is a channel that's open in my mind 24/7 -- and it's something that's really hard for me to turn off before it impedes my ability to act in the moment in the real world. It becomes a problem in conjunction with issues like anxiety.

In fact, I do things like imagine myself years later, and think about how I'm going to be in the future remembering myself imagine this moment in the past :D .
 
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Foresight is not a bad thing. It's something I have always had, like [MENTION=3998]niffer[/MENTION] said ... it's a 24/7 thing. Do you ever wonder if by chance there was a lifetime where you actually DID do those things and that is why you have an aversion to them?
 
Foresight is not a bad thing. It's something I have always had, like @niffer said ... it's a 24/7 thing. Do you ever wonder if by chance there was a lifetime where you actually DID do those things and that is why you have an aversion to them?

Oh for me it's not foresight. :D I'm usually wrong! I don't do it to be accurate or predict the future.. it just kinda happens and it's annoying and I have to be more careful to make sure it doesn't override my logic for how I want to handle a situation. Sometimes positive future visualizations can be inspiring, or on the flip side can give me too much confidence!
 
This is something I can relate to - I think about the future a lot (risks, rewards, happiness, sadness, everything - more apparent before a big decision though). I don't always see it as a negative, my sister is the exact opposite... rarely thinks about anything - dives headfirst into every situation, and has ended up going in over her head more times than I can recall. I've always been very thoughtful about the future(perhaps to a fault), about what may or may not occur - which can be helpful, but can also stunt my personal growth. It would be nice to fall somewhere in the middle...
 
This is something I can relate to - I think about the future a lot (risks, rewards, happiness, sadness, everything - more apparent before a big decision though). I don't always see it as a negative, my sister is the exact opposite... rarely thinks about anything - dives headfirst into every situation, and has ended up going in over her head more times than I can recall. I've always been very thoughtful about the future(perhaps to a fault), about what may or may not occur - which can be helpful, but can also stunt my personal growth. It would be nice to fall somewhere in the middle...

I actually envy people like your sister (or my wife) and see that as a typical "Sensor" approach to life. They can get involved with these huge, complicated, ideas and projects and never once stop to think about how the future of it will end up.
 
Yes.
Especially when it comes to moral decisions.
Then I feel all of the wonderful guilt of being selfish without actually being selfish, and then I avoid doing something selfish.
(Well, usually.)
 
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I actually envy people like your sister (or my wife) and see that as a typical "Sensor" approach to life. They can get involved with these huge, complicated, ideas and projects and never once stop to think about how the future of it will end up.

There's certainly something to admire about those traits, but sometimes i'm just like....wut???

My sister seems to have some sort of infinite motivation/drive in almost everything she pursues. I can only do that in certain specific fields I'm very interested/ or invested in.
 
i try very hard not to think ahead. it's enough to think about the present for me, without projecting a bunch of other stuff into the equation.
i have dreams for the future, but i find if i focus on those rather than what's going on right now i miss a couple steps and have to go back and have a do over lol
 
Yes.
Especially when it comes to moral decisions.
Then I feel all of the wonderful guilt of being selfish without actually being selfish, and then I avoid doing something selfish.
(Well, usually.)

selfish is not the same as self centered.
to be selfish is to love yourself. to be self centered is to love yourself above everything else. so g'head be selfish!!
 
I do this constantly. But you know what? It's a blessing and a curse. Sometimes it's helpful foresight. Other times I convince myself that I know what something will be when I really don't. The best parts of life are the things you never see coming. I limit myself by thinking I know what a certain choice will lead to. I never really do and the further out I project, the more exhausted and demoralized I get. I want to stop this. It's important to let assumptions go.
 
Have you ever "lived" the next few minutes, hours or even years of your life all at once without actually going through the physical aspects of those moments? There are two instances I can think of to describe this with me at least:

I wake up in the morning to the alarm. I lie in bed for a few minutes, during which time I picture taking a shower, washing up, brushing my teeth, getting dressed, etc. and then I actually feel tired and bored before even getting a foot out of the bed. It's like I just lived the next half hour of my life in that 10 second period without having even moved.

The last happened the other day when I was driving by a college and considered going to grad school there. I pictured the type of job I would end up working while there, the apartment I'd rent and pretty much every aspect of my life, good and bad. While driving from one end of town to the other, I had pretty much lived the next 4 years of my life in that scenario, even if it wasn't entirely accurate.

I'm trying to figure out exactly what parts of my personality allow instances like that to take hold... In a lot of ways, it's really depressing and it starts me down the path of "why bother" thoughts.

What allows for these visions is iNtuition. I do the same thing, except that, when I do it, I imagine my life in its entirety. And then I get really bored with it and don't feel like living it. Depressing, "why bother" thoughts, indeed.