10 things to on a date and or to seduce someone | INFJ Forum

10 things to on a date and or to seduce someone

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by slant, Nov 26, 2009.

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  1. slant

    slant Leave me be

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    I was gonna respond to lastdawn's thread with this, but found it deserved it's own thread. Here are my ten:

    1.) Whisper dark seductive things into the victim’s ears.
    2.) Make sure to allow the victim to walk off and pretend like it doesn’t want to sit near you; then convince it that it does.
    3.) Talk to the victim and make jokes, horrible, dark ones. The victim will eventually blurt things out uncontrollably. Act interested, because you are interested.
    4.) Make sure to share the story about when you had to beat your mom’s boyfriend down with a broomstick and how you were incarcerated. Emphasize that you are not normally violent but you couldn’t let your mother suffer anymore.
    5.) Explain to the victim how you hear voices and how you’ve been diagnosed with schitzophrenia. Either act happy about it and smug, or deny that you think there is a such thing as the condition with complex, intelligent off the wall sounding theories.
    6.) Discuss your anarchist views and other paranoid, off the wall views. Make racist jokes but assure the victim you are not racist, that you just like to get in people’s faces and ruff them up a bit to test the waters.
    7.) Talk about how you have a dungeon full of sex toys in your basement and how you like to consume blood. Explain your skills in sex, and that you aren’t the in and out kind of person. Explain that you find blood sexually pleasing, and offer to participate in this some day.
    8.) Explain how you have done hard core drugs in the past to enlighten yourself. Then explain how they didn’t work, but you’ve still gained some insight from it.
    9.) Retrieve the victim’s cellphone number. Once the victim is out of sight, text it disturbing poetic strings of words that often depict violence in a lustful, attractive way. Make up forms of torture that are so original and creative that it would render anyone a suspect in a variety of crimes. The victim will save the text messages and lust over them.
    10.) Be evasive with your line of work. Explain you work for your uncle, but do not disclose what you do or how much it pays. Just say, it’s complicated. Allow someone else to reveal that you work at an old folk’s home or something cheesy like that, and then let the victim confront you. Explain to the victim that, you didn’t want your charity to affect it’s perception of you.
     
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  2. Naxx

    Naxx Permanent Fixture

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    I don't need 10 things, I only need 1 thing; that is a box.

    [YOUTUBE]<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/WhwbxEfy7fg&hl=en_US&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/WhwbxEfy7fg&hl=en_US&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="344" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object>[/YOUTUBE]
     
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  3. Skoffin

    Skoffin <font color=#00EE99>She Whose Name We Do Not Speak

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    I think I've just turned gay for Slant :dizzy:
     
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  4. Gaze

    Donor

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    LOL
     
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  5. AUM

    AUM The Romantic Scientist

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    I absolutely agree slant. Your response needed a seperate thread :D
     
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  6. Satya

    Satya C'est la vie
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    And that honestly would not be my worse date.
     
  7. OP
    slant

    slant Leave me be

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    Could someone change the title to

    "10 thing to do on a date or to seduce someone"
     
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  8. yumiii

    yumiii Community Member

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    LOL! You are one funny guy mister.
    This video brings back some nice memories though.
    :m066:
     
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  9. laffeytaffey

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    *laughs* I haven't seen the video, but an ex boyfriend had me listen to the song. SO funny!
     
  10. Billy

    Billy Contents Under Pressure
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    Just use funky cold medina.
     
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