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Oranguh

Oranguh

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  • D
    Yup. Lose-lose and still on the road, looking for the sign.
    Who I am, who I'm not, who they want me to be, who I'd like to be...all's an ever-changing mystery.
    Perhaps I'll make sense of it one day.
    D
    I guess it just keeps coming to the fact that I want to feel like things are settled, even though I know that can never be. I'd like to believe that my existence has a purpose, but I don't. I find myself waffling, and simply amassing knowledge on my search for wisdom and truth. My thoughts are at odds with each other as though I have two minds on every subject, and my emotions are at war with both of them. I'm stuck in the middle and I don't know who to listen to. It drives me absolutely crazy.

    I think the biggest difference between you and I is that, although we are basically in agreement...you are relaxed and accepting of this, while I am frustrated and fighting it. While it's easy to say someone should be less serious, I feel I'm going against...something...when I do. It just makes me very uncomfortable...and I don't know how to not be.
    D
    Perhaps that is the P functioning within your type? While there is a part of me that enjoys the idea of unsolvable mysteries; it is the continuous questing questioning that drives me forward. To me, understanding is a need.

    How are you able to separate yourself from needs? Needs, by definition, are necessary for function as opposed to wants. But both wants and needs are driving functions that people desire to satisfy. When they aren't met, the self is not all it can be. How is there purpose in this?

    Or are you saying you are satisfied in living life as it comes, without drive or purpose? I cannot comprehend how one would be able to do that.
    D
    Faith is something I've always had difficulty with. I might understand something, but that does not mean I believe it.

    Also, I've always been critical of my own shortcomings. And while I do worry for the reasons of productive planning...there's always a great deal of free-floating anxiety for me...simply because I feel that I will never absolutely know! Which only serves to frustrate me further...
    D
    The particular situation I was involved in concerned a person questioning the intentions of the other. A big misunderstanding ensued...with hurt feeling on both sides, all due to the lacking of internet communications.

    All people may be capable of mutual understanding, as you say; unfortunately, not all of them are willing. Perhaps I shouldn't allow this to affect my future interactions, but I do anyway.

    And telling me not to worry....well, ha ha...I have a very low DGAF quotient.
    A
    Not quite sure if you meant me, but apologies anyway. :p I wasn't trying to be snarky, just playing along...
    A
    Inorite? We should take over the collective consciousness and teach people how to reason.

    How does mind-control sound to you?
    D
    Certainly I can see the negative effect. I, too, can see both sides...which is why I feel conflicted about this.

    When I attempt to explain something I try to be very linear and be as particular as possible so there's as slight a chance of misunderstanding as possible. Not everyone else does the same, nor do I expect them to. This is not where my personal conflict lies, as I'm willing to try to make my point understood to anyone who'd like to understand better.

    My issue lies in questioning the motives or beliefs of others. Who am I to say they are wrong or do not make sense? Perhaps in their own experience, they do. There have been feelings hurt here, and I know I've unintentionally contributed to this. It makes me feel rotten.

    I truly have not yet figured out an acceptable compromise to this conundrum.
    D
    While internet takes down the barriers in one sense, I find communication in writing to be lacking. Typing out different explanations to explain something as abstract as feeling and be completely understood is difficult. Who wants to be frustrated by the necessity of re-explaining what they think they have already expressed so well? Who wants to be the one constantly saying lolwut all the time and feeling like a jackass?

    Tone in speech is a great indicator of what someone really means as is facial expression and body language. All these non-verbal cues are lacking online. And while misunderstandings can be more easily avoided with direct, clear phrasing, some people prefer abstractions, or lack the ability to word their posts in any semblance of linear thought. Most of the negative drama created is caused by communication fuck-ups. That shit hurts people. I really don't want to laugh at something, thinking it was a joke, and then find out the person was totally serious. Done it a lot already, and I wish I could take it back.

    So I admit that some of what I perceive as a barrier is self-imposed, and thus not necessarily 'real', but still a compelling reason for me.
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