Towards ourselves | INFJ Forum

Towards ourselves


Community Member
Mar 21, 2009

i really like this video because it addresses a key issue that i believe dwells in the INFJ blindspot. only after watching this did i realize and reflect on the almost startling fact that i am not the empathetically understanding person i am toward myself, as i am toward others by nature. i've noticed that i'm terribly demanding of myself and often have somewhat critical standards. i don't often embrace and nurture my own weaknesses as i do with others' and have the tendency of counseling others over healing my own scars and bruises. i knew to an extent that this was so, but not until i saw this video did it strike me quite clearly.

is this really an INFJ tendency?
Great video.
Thanks for posting that, rainrise. I felt it was very insightful.

I became aware in watching that it is true, my own sense of need being met can be deeply connected to whether or not the person I am with seems to be having their needs met. When there is a conflict between what I need and what the person I'm interacting with seems to need, I generally either forgo the meeting of my own need for the sake of theirs, or withdraw from that person so I can tend to my own need. It is the rare situation where I remain, express my need, and ask for it to take precedence. I do think I am more likely to remain as I've grown and matured, however.

Other thoughts about the video's expression of INFJs that were resonant or not:

I do try to control the perception of my vulnerabilities. I don't like to be caught off-guard in them. I think this is why I am quick to express them first, so I have ownership.

I did not personally have resonance with the final section about nurturing someone until they are strong enough to take flight and then feeling some sense of ownership for their success. By observation I think it could be true among some INFJ's though.
great video!

It is basicaly my vision on INFJ's. But than again, I'm also INFP :D

Especially the part where she says that it is invasive when INFJ's try to fix your problems. I have that too. I like that other people listen to my problems because the "telling" alone gives me the oportunity to have a clearer vision on my problems. And for the rest, I have to solve it on my own. If someone tells me "do this", "to that", I feel obligated to do that. But it want come from within and so it will never solve my problem.

thats an INFPs view on the video :becky: