The Dying Process | INFJ Forum

The Dying Process


C'est la vie
Retired Staff
May 11, 2008
Has anyone here ever had to deal with someone close to them going through the dying process?
What is your philosophy; is it a beautiful process or a horribly painful thing?
I have seen a few people dying and most of them had a kind of resignation about the fact, or a religious perspective about it. There has only been one person dying who kind of disturbed me - he was a distant relative of mine who had been a German officer in WWII. I suspect that he had probably done a lot of things he was uncomfortable with (deep down discomfort). It seemed as though all these things came back to bite him in the backside in his last few days. I don't want to die like him.

* I hope that no one mourns me. *

Personally, I anticipate my own death with some unease - I am both spiritual and religious (that distinction was made by someone else on another thread) - and my religion doesn't hold death forward as anything good or appealing, but rather as a change. My own feeling is that death spells the end of whatever we have been trying to do in life, which at some points in my life has seemed appealing and at other times worrying. If I were to die tomorrow, I would feel that I have a lot of loose ends I wish I could tie up.
I worked at a retirement home (old folks home) and most of them were in the process of dying - when you get to 90 it doesn't matter how fit you are - your days are numbered!
A few were absolutely filled with joy about the whole thing - you could see love and faith shining behind their eyes. Others were scared and clingy. They didn't want to be left alone for long periods of time. They were afraid of dying alone.
Some were quite bitter and had a, "Who the eff cares," kind of attitude. They had a big personal wall about it too and didn't allow anyone to talk about it with them.
Some were strong and some were weak, some were angry and some were sad, some were scared and some were brave ........
It really seems to be the most personal experience anyone will ever have, something that is different for everyone and something everyone experiences differently.