ongoing grief expressions: passed loved ones as a part of life going on

[invisible]

it is quite difficult loving someone who is dead, because the process of loving a dead person makes me feel like a part of me is dead too. but the way that i have come up with to try to deal with this is making that person a part of my living. at times the feelings of grief are very overwhelming and this means that it is necessary to deal with these things. i havent been able to think of another way to deal with this.

 

[Free]

it is quite difficult loving someone who is dead, because the process of loving a dead person makes me feel like a part of me is dead too. but the way that i have come up with to try to deal with this is making that person a part of my living. at times the feelings of grief are very overwhelming and this means that it is necessary to deal with these things. i havent been able to think of another way to deal with this.

I'm so sorry.

The only way I got through my grief (still am getting through it in regards to my brother) is to realize that even though they are gone, my life will go on till its inevitable conclusion. They are still a part of who I am; they helped to shape the person staring back at me in the mirror. I will always carry them with me, but I have learned to let them go at the same time. I have learned the difference between carrying your grief for them instead of carrying your love for them.
<3

I carry your heart with me
- E.E.Cummings

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go, my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in my heart)
​

 

[just me]

I feel we are blessed when we have someone so close we cannot talk about them for years without filling up and overflowing with emotion.

 

[hush]

Just saw this, though I first read the book years ago.

Made me "hmmm..." and think of this thread:

“To forget the dead would be akin to killing them a second time.”
– Elie Wiesel, Night​

 

[Lerxst]

Buddhism and death are a unique mix. Western religions tell you that life begins and then it ends, but after that you keep going. They all assume that you are an entity and that entity will continue to exist in one form or another and go some place after we die.

Now, if you're truly Buddhist, life neither begins nor ends and death is nothing more than a ripple in the ocean.

The only pain experienced with a death are with the people still alive. It all comes back to the notions of "attachment" and "suffering"; we're attached to the person, we're attached to our feelings and we're attached to our memories. We're also human though and not perfect, so it's going to hurt... it just doesn't have to hurt as much as we make it hurt.

 

[just me]

How do you suppose we make it hurt?

 

[Sriracha]

I talk to my mother, nearly everyday. I believe she can hear me, she lets me know she is around when I need it most. There are special events or occasions I will wear a piece of her jewelry, especially her ring. When I look at my hand, I see hers.

 

[wolkenkraetzer]

I've made arrangements to fund a small scholarship in my late wife's name at the university where we met.

 

[Free]

I've made arrangements to fund a small scholarship in my late wife's name at the university where we met.

That is an absolute beautiful way to honor your wife. <3