I can fake F
really well when I need to. When I care about people, I can analyze what they need and be that person for them.
For instance, person X is upset and considering suicide.
Their reasons? Not good enough in my opinion. Am I sick of this? Yes.
Do I even particularly care about the underlying emotional issues involved with each of these problems? No.
BUT!
Do I want my friend to be sad/suicidal? No.
My favorite show is on, and I have a new book. It's cold outside and X person wants to talk outside. I hate the cold. I feel pretty resentful of person Xs selfish fish-bowl mentality and inability to see past their own problems.
BUT, again, I do care about the person.
So I go outside, I give them a big, looong hug, I tell them I love them, that they know I won't judge them, so if they want to talk, I'm here.
Then I sit there in the freezing cold for what feels like an hour while my favorite show is on somewhere warm where normally I would be cooking dinner.
Speaking of which, I'm hungry.
But I wait for person to speak, and when they do, I listen. And then we talk for hours. More hugs. I threaten person X bodily harm if they ever manage to off them-self, because they are important to me and even if they turned evil/ managed to lose more, be less, have more issues, I would still love them.
I make person X laugh, we talk more. I don't really tell person X what's gong through my head or try to logically talk to them about their feelings. If anything the conversation stays largely irrational.
Person X says they are sorry that they "put all this on me." I don't know how to say that the knowledge of their issues is really not at all a burdan on me since I don't care. I care that they're depressed, the things that caused it might be heavy if I was experiencing it, but it's not that big of a burden.
So I tell the truth that I can tell, I say it would be more of a burden to me if I felt like they couldn't talk to me about these things. I say that I value X and our friendship highly and that I know if/when I had issues I could talk to person X about them, so don't worry about it...
I'm not sure if this is as much a mask, as just being able to utilize skills every human has in order to be there for my friends.