dudemanbro
Community Member
- MBTI
- INFJ IEI-Ni
- Enneagram
- 4w5 sp/sx
Hello you crazy fucks <3
So, like you probably did, I joined this site because I am completely insane during some moments of life.....with some occasional lucid periods.
I live with my parents and can sense that my last year of high school will be difficult. My father is an ENTP (not typed, my guess) who complains about small things, he has been in something of a midlife crisis for the last ten years. As you can guess, I've been trying to help him because I feel like I know the answers, but he doesn't understand me. He's more comfortable being miserable. He's so smart yet he works like a mule. My mom is an ET (extraterrestrial extroverted thinker), and most likely a judger. She is a hard worker who suffers from chronic un-relaxation, she is a strong woman. My sister is an ENFP (not typed, my guess). An unorganized artist who sees the beauty in others but made shitty friends, which is unfortunate for her, but I am there for her.
I've taught myself to be motivated, so that I can work on tedious things non-stop until they are done, and I'm happy I've been able to do this. However, I should have finished grade 12 last year and am 7 credits behind. Those credits were lost because I dropped out for a semester during financial troubles, where I felt like my family needed me, but in the end I just ended up sitting on my ass unable to help. So in my eyes I'm just a person who wants to help, while in my family's eyes I am a lazy privileged brat with wasted potential, which may be true. I am seen as dangerous because I reject Christianity. Now, there aren't that many things in the "holy" Bible that I disagree with (well except half of the old testament), yet my family thinks I am devoted to science and reject spirituality. I don't though! In fact I find myself more in touch than them, though I don't show it as much as they do. I'm pretty sure I offended my mum once when I told her my opinion on the book of Revelations (Apocalypse). I told her it felt like John the prophet was taking high doses of psychedelics and using his intuition to predict the future. That got a bad reaction. So basically this kind of stuff has brought me to depression during my early years. I realize that I need to toughen up in order to survive, to pass highschool. I have to teach myself to work on a project until it's done. Wanna hear something that I find funny in retrospect? I'll tell you anyways. One time I was so depressed I lay in bed for something like a week, just drinking water and trying to sleep my life away. Plus side is, I went into ketosis and lost quite a bit of weight, I feel lighter now. Downside is I lost some muscle mass, but I've grown much more physically powerful since then. Lifting, running, and biking daily has helped with that.
Here, let me tell you even more about myself. I am deeply interested in music, I DJ in the bedroom (and occasional school dances). I have been absolutely fascinated by astronomy since I knew what outer space was (the universe is just ego-fracturingly, pants-shittingly HUGE, man). Other areas of interest are psychology, anthropology, psychedelic experience and the "numinous," humanities, mathematics (number theory especially), physics, quantum (even though I truly understand >1% of what I read on the topic, and Stephen Hawking is so goddamn cerebral it can make my skin crawl, but I love it anyways). As a kid I was really into Lego and books. Lots of books. Writing has been a weak point however (I'm simply too much of a perfectionist and day-dreamy to write essays). I'm warm on the inside and cold on the outside. I'm sure you can relate with many of the things I have pointed out here.
Fuckin MISUNDERSTANDINGS MAN. That's what really gets to me. It seems that despite my true self deep inside, my family has a completely different opinion on me. I guess INFJs really do have a poor idea of how others see them. Plus side is, I can freak out my buddies sometimes because I know exactly how they feel before even they can. Feels weird, man.
So, my question truly is: what the FUCK am I supposed to do with the remainder of my insignificant life? I've gotten over the fact that my life has absolutely no meaning and that I will die and be forgotten no matter how greatly I go down in history. I don't even need that to feel happy, all I need is a woman who understands me, a large bag of cannabis, and sweet crunchy tunes. No, I don't sport dreads and talk like that. Very few people in my life know that I even know about that kind of stuff, I'm stealthy.
Now that I've spilled out my life story, tell me about yourselves, you weirdos. I love stories.
So, like you probably did, I joined this site because I am completely insane during some moments of life.....with some occasional lucid periods.
I live with my parents and can sense that my last year of high school will be difficult. My father is an ENTP (not typed, my guess) who complains about small things, he has been in something of a midlife crisis for the last ten years. As you can guess, I've been trying to help him because I feel like I know the answers, but he doesn't understand me. He's more comfortable being miserable. He's so smart yet he works like a mule. My mom is an ET (extraterrestrial extroverted thinker), and most likely a judger. She is a hard worker who suffers from chronic un-relaxation, she is a strong woman. My sister is an ENFP (not typed, my guess). An unorganized artist who sees the beauty in others but made shitty friends, which is unfortunate for her, but I am there for her.
I've taught myself to be motivated, so that I can work on tedious things non-stop until they are done, and I'm happy I've been able to do this. However, I should have finished grade 12 last year and am 7 credits behind. Those credits were lost because I dropped out for a semester during financial troubles, where I felt like my family needed me, but in the end I just ended up sitting on my ass unable to help. So in my eyes I'm just a person who wants to help, while in my family's eyes I am a lazy privileged brat with wasted potential, which may be true. I am seen as dangerous because I reject Christianity. Now, there aren't that many things in the "holy" Bible that I disagree with (well except half of the old testament), yet my family thinks I am devoted to science and reject spirituality. I don't though! In fact I find myself more in touch than them, though I don't show it as much as they do. I'm pretty sure I offended my mum once when I told her my opinion on the book of Revelations (Apocalypse). I told her it felt like John the prophet was taking high doses of psychedelics and using his intuition to predict the future. That got a bad reaction. So basically this kind of stuff has brought me to depression during my early years. I realize that I need to toughen up in order to survive, to pass highschool. I have to teach myself to work on a project until it's done. Wanna hear something that I find funny in retrospect? I'll tell you anyways. One time I was so depressed I lay in bed for something like a week, just drinking water and trying to sleep my life away. Plus side is, I went into ketosis and lost quite a bit of weight, I feel lighter now. Downside is I lost some muscle mass, but I've grown much more physically powerful since then. Lifting, running, and biking daily has helped with that.
Here, let me tell you even more about myself. I am deeply interested in music, I DJ in the bedroom (and occasional school dances). I have been absolutely fascinated by astronomy since I knew what outer space was (the universe is just ego-fracturingly, pants-shittingly HUGE, man). Other areas of interest are psychology, anthropology, psychedelic experience and the "numinous," humanities, mathematics (number theory especially), physics, quantum (even though I truly understand >1% of what I read on the topic, and Stephen Hawking is so goddamn cerebral it can make my skin crawl, but I love it anyways). As a kid I was really into Lego and books. Lots of books. Writing has been a weak point however (I'm simply too much of a perfectionist and day-dreamy to write essays). I'm warm on the inside and cold on the outside. I'm sure you can relate with many of the things I have pointed out here.
Fuckin MISUNDERSTANDINGS MAN. That's what really gets to me. It seems that despite my true self deep inside, my family has a completely different opinion on me. I guess INFJs really do have a poor idea of how others see them. Plus side is, I can freak out my buddies sometimes because I know exactly how they feel before even they can. Feels weird, man.
So, my question truly is: what the FUCK am I supposed to do with the remainder of my insignificant life? I've gotten over the fact that my life has absolutely no meaning and that I will die and be forgotten no matter how greatly I go down in history. I don't even need that to feel happy, all I need is a woman who understands me, a large bag of cannabis, and sweet crunchy tunes. No, I don't sport dreads and talk like that. Very few people in my life know that I even know about that kind of stuff, I'm stealthy.
Now that I've spilled out my life story, tell me about yourselves, you weirdos. I love stories.
My sister is an ESFJ and can take care of herself with peers, a little manipulative to many but can be manipulated easily by those smarter than her, heheh. I tried to get my parents to do the test but none of them have time... not that it matters. I know you can't type others but I trust my judgement this time around. The puzzle fits.