INFJ and Generosity | INFJ Forum

INFJ and Generosity

Chalti

Chalti

Regular Poster
Sep 8, 2014
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So, I have read that INFJ are pretty magnanimous, and I wanted to know if this was true for you? Who are you willing to give to? What compels you to give certain things to some people? Have you ever given anything to strangers? And what is the extent of your generosity?

I tend to like giving people things which makes me a bit reckless. Even to a stranger or an acquaintance I enjoy giving them something to take their minds off of something stressing them out. For a friend, I would give up so much for them to feel happy - I have continuously offered lodging and money - but these are only available to my closest friends.
 
I'm very generous. Say a guy loans me $5. Say he doesn't get back to me. I'll wait. I'm still waiting.

It is because I'd do the same for him.
 
I once gave a homeless family $500 and loaned a friend thousands. The friend paid me back but I never expected her to. I give things to people all the time. I feel like everyone is just trying to get by but I have this internal gyroscope that sets me in the right direction every time. I like to share things because people are more important than things. Always.
 
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I donate on a regular basis to the local foodbank (in my wife's memory) and a few animal shelters. All my animals were/are "rescues".
 
o_q said:
I feel like some people subconsciously wait until you're worth less than the money you let them borrow. But I guess that's just me, not worth much to begin with.

cuts wrists
Click to expand...

You never fail to make me laugh, cynical person. I love that about you.
 
Yes to being generous but I get quite embarrassed talking about the specifics. I remember giving money to a friend years ago and then finding out that she had used it for drugs. Since then I've become more conscientious in my giving. So eg I would prefer to buy food for a homeless person rather than give them money.

I'm not good at loaning my books - on the one hand I like to share but get annoyed if they're not returned.
 
.....money..I dunno. Emotional generosity and time and effort, though, is quite cheap in my book--

For better or worse. *laugh*
 
Sometimes I feel like I'm an ENFJ.. because whatever someone needs, if I have it, I'm like sure... but I did have to learn that some people dont appreciate... now im more discriminating

I think I always felt like nothing is really mine in the first place is it? cosmically stuff just goes from place to place leaves comes back leaves comes back....

Everything gets moved around, so im just a sitting spot, for everything that I've got. (Well, this would be a cool lyric)

I've had several people live with me for Free too, which I never thought was a big deal.. until when I had hard times, I had absolutely no one who could offer me the same thing...

My enneagram did come up as 2.. but When I read it said women often come up as 2 when they are actually 9..

Is it possible to be an INFJ 2 Chameleon, generous, giving, lifelong social reject?? IDK
 
Hrrm. Well, if you were an ENFJ then you'd be not a recluse. Are you a not recluse? I believe I know the kind of person it would be, but I forgot the name. A Balkan socialist. Complete and total outcast. Likes to mess with people (He said so). Has a picture of Stalin on his wall just for this purpose. Main argument against capitalism in the video at the time was all the waste it created, which is true. When I was at Met Life Stadium in New York my first time, it was very windy. The parking lot is huge. All the trash went from one corner of the parking lot to the other. It was incredible. Of course, being in Marching Band, we had to stand out in the middle of it. Every few seconds a plastic bag, one that could be recycled, would end up caught on someone's hat. We put our hats on the ground when rehearsing.

You'd still have the prediction, just the emotions would be first. Makes you much more approachable by friends. Your enneagram is likely right. 9s are created, not born. Well, either way, you are our friend. Just one question. Why the label of social reject?

I'm trying to remember the name of the guy so I can find the video. Backtracking begins! Found him. Slavoj Zizeck or Slavoj Žižek

I like this guy. http://www.theguardian.com/commenti...zizek-philosopher-what-is-freedom-today-video

To remain on topic, oddly enough, my mom doesn't like my loaning of money. This is why I am not as generous as I would be. But pretty much the way it works is that you have to be right in front of us and also in need of help. Sorry starving kids in Africa, this man needs a quarter for his lunch. To my defense, I'd take all the McDonald's everywhere and ship it there. You can argue that food goes bad. (most) McDonalds doesn't. Solve obesity and hunger at the same time. Yes this is ridiculously impractical cost-wise. So is globalization. I also tip generously.

But yeah. To explain my thoughts on donating. I'd rather be able to see the person I'm donating to get the money, food, clothes or whatever. I can't be a bystander in what I donate. Has to do with a mistrust of the corrupt governments in the region. If my one dollar goes to the corrupt government in South Africa, say, (Even though they're pretty tame), the answer is no.

Also realized he looks like the German guy. Wagner. Cool. Same eyebrows. You always type by the eyebrows, because eyebrows are the most expressive part of the face. Your mouth can go up and down, but really doesn't except in certain times. Nose can't really move. Ears, only in some people.
 
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I have to agree it has to be an immediate generosity.. I dont really go out of my way to give.. but if I have food I'm bringing to a christmas party and there is a homeless man with a sign he gets my carton of blackberries... they were probably really yummy..
also... since I've always been affected by homelessness that i see.. i noticed they never have socks.. so I started carrying around socks just in case..
 
This guy is so cool.. especially with his lisp. i agree with much he says, the interconnected system is restraining.. im pretty against capitalism too.. i have a few marxist and communist friends.. i can definitely understand the views..

you say 9's are created huh? but I was always about harmony.. it has always been a priority.. I've always wanted every situation

I can be so socially awkward I try to be enthusiastic about life and relationships because so many traumatic thing have happened in the last couple years..

But If i get a strong read from someone, that I find a distaste in, I get upset if I am forced to be around them..
I might come off from left field disliking someone, and no one understands why, because it is not necessarily something the person said..
sometimes i can tell what someone is not saying and when they are really an asshole.

Maybe my resolution to myself is to not allow assholes to walk by me unnoticed.. im not sure, its unconscious

but if the party goers are not good people i can feel it.. it affects my enjoyment.. if a friend is dating someone who I get a bad vibe from..
I make it known.. even though it is not on purpose

I guess I try to figure out why this person creates such a distaste for me ideologically, which sometimes is the case.

this just definitely puts a strain on anything socially good that I may have created..

I sometimes rant about a person after i meet them if something inside me ticks.

ITs just not a great thing..

There is this guy who gives out samples at trader joes.. he has a way about him... he is very friendly, very nice, jokes a lot.

I loathe him basically and he knows it because I'm not nice to him, i dont engage him how I should.. because there is just something not right

I guess it is just how he comes off unprofessional, casual, and damn annoying.. scale it back dude.

I asked a coworker of his, he probably gets complaints a lot.. and they admitted he did..

I have 2 friends, who are both coworkers Ive known 3 months. Theyve seen me be very nice and polite with everyone that comes in the shop

but they have now also seen me dislike and show no nice-ities to about 3-4 people

they dont get it, but I explain it to them after they accept me.. but still dont see what i see one is ENTP and the other ENFP

I do much better in small groups of really good people.

they really have to be good though.. because if one comes in, who is not, i can end up having a completely odd interaction
 
Profoundhappiness said:
This guy is so cool.. especially with his lisp. i agree with much he says, the interconnected system is restraining.. im pretty against capitalism too.. i have a few marxist and communist friends.. i can definitely understand the views..

you say 9's are created huh? but I was always about harmony.. it has always been a priority.. I've always wanted every situation

I can be so socially awkward I try to be enthusiastic about life and relationships because so many traumatic thing have happened in the last couple years..

But If i get a strong read from someone, that I find a distaste in, I get upset if I am forced to be around them..
I might come off from left field disliking someone, and no one understands why, because it is not necessarily something the person said..
sometimes i can tell what someone is not saying and when they are really an asshole.

Maybe my resolution to myself is to not allow assholes to walk by me unnoticed.. im not sure, its unconscious

but if the party goers are not good people i can feel it.. it affects my enjoyment.. if a friend is dating someone who I get a bad vibe from..
I make it known.. even though it is not on purpose

I guess I try to figure out why this person creates such a distaste for me ideologically, which sometimes is the case.

this just definitely puts a strain on anything socially good that I may have created..

I sometimes rant about a person after i meet them if something inside me ticks.

ITs just not a great thing..

There is this guy who gives out samples at trader joes.. he has a way about him... he is very friendly, very nice, jokes a lot.

I loathe him basically and he knows it because I'm not nice to him, i dont engage him how I should.. because there is just something not right

I guess it is just how he comes off unprofessional, casual, and damn annoying.. scale it back dude.

I asked a coworker of his, he probably gets complaints a lot.. and they admitted he did..

I have 2 friends, who are both coworkers Ive known 3 months. Theyve seen me be very nice and polite with everyone that comes in the shop

but they have now also seen me dislike and show no nice-ities to about 3-4 people

they dont get it, but I explain it to them after they accept me.. but still dont see what i see one is ENTP and the other ENFP

I do much better in small groups of really good people.

they really have to be good though.. because if one comes in, who is not, i can end up having a completely odd interaction
Click to expand...

Good. You're learning.
 
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