How You Self Sabotage? | INFJ Forum

How You Self Sabotage?

aeon

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How Do You Self Sabotage?

Based on Shirzad Chamine’s New York Times bestseller and Stanford lectures.

Research included 500,000 participants, world class athletes, and leaders from every Fortune 100 company.



Cheers,
Ian
 
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Gotta love that first sentence of “Original Survival Function.”
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Cheers,
Ian
 
Screenshot_20211205-185000~2.jpg I got a tie between Stickler Pleaser Hypervigilant.

Sigh... I'm working on it.

It's interesting that my top three are in the earn column. I feel I have to earn everything and am worthy of nothing. Sounds accurate.

Be perfect to get love, be loving to get loved and be hypervigilant to stay safe.
 
Last edited:
@acd @Linda Loo

Oops...initial post edited to fix link.

My Bad,
Ian
 
Thanks! I took it but the link in the profile doesn't seem to work. Ah well. I found myself answering a lot for the hyper vigilant, anxious and self critical. :sweatsmile:
*Smooch*
 
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I got Stickler/Pleaser

7.5 Stickler
6.9 Pleaser
6.9 Controller
6.9 Avoider

I guess I have independence issues or something.
I don't feel particularly strongly about any of them.
I can be all of them at times though for sure and I think people would call me a Stickler more than anything.
I do have troubles with perfectionism which I'm slowly getting better at curbing.
The other three I think I have a decent handle on overall.
 
It's interesting that my top three are in the earn column. I feel I have to earn everything and am worthy of nothing. Sounds accurate.

Be perfect to get love, be loving to get loved and be hypervigilant to stay safe.

I don’t see any of them as better or worse, just different.

Assert seems like a statement of by these actions I will have autonomy, validation, and peace of mind through willfully violating the boundaries of others, playing someone else’s game hard for rewards, and always being busy so there’s no me left to defend.

Earn seems like a statement of by my efforts I will prove that I deserve autonomy, validation, and peace of mind through being my own harsh inner critic, currying favor with those in control, and always being on guard and looking for threats.

Avoid seems like a statement of by hiding who I am I will obtain autonomy, validation, and peace of mind through not getting involved to begin with, crying out poor me in hope of sympathy and care, and retreating to the safety facts provide, because they can’t be invalidated like emotions can, so the real me can stay safe.

my 2¢,
Ian
 
Me: If I even decide to show up to begin with, we will play by my rules, and the very moment you try to fuck with me, I will transform into a would-be-INTJ and simply lay out how misinformed and misguided you are, but nothing personal mang, we’re cool, yo.

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Cheers,
Ian