How Many Dates Until You've Officially 'Dated' Someone? | INFJ Forum

How Many Dates Until You've Officially 'Dated' Someone?

QuietlyBrilliant

QuietlyBrilliant

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Jan 14, 2012
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Hi,

This thread may seem somewhat superficial in comparison to the others on here, but it's just a small query of mine.

I'm currently in University and was just wondering how many dates do you need to have with a person until you've officially 'dated' them. I'm asking because I met this guy out in a club and ended up going back to his (nothing happened) and has his hoodie so had to meet up and we went on one date and then another after that. We have no plans to meet up in the future and don't think we will. If I'm honest, I feel like we only really clicked on the basis that we liked each other's looks (not surprising considering how we met), he was the whole 'captain of the rugby team, gym buff' type of guy and there just wasn't any emotional connection there.

Even though we've only met three times, I did go back to his twice (didn't sleep with him) and there was a lot of sexual chemistry (however, not much else).
So, do I call him a guy I've dated? Or just someone I met a few times? He definitely defined the times we met up as dates.
 
I think it's up to you what you call it! I like to curb the numbers to meet my needs... ;)
 
1 date and you've dated.
 
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hmm...so...going on a date and dating are the same thing? Even if it's just once?
 
say what said:
hmm...so...going on a date and dating are the same thing? Even if it's just once?
Click to expand...

from a semantic point of view, yes. Going on a date means you've dated.

Perhaps a better question is "How many dates qualify as being in a relationship?" Of course, it varies.
 
interesting. I would say going on one date, dating, and in a relationship are very different...but, i think it's each to their own
 
technically 1 date and youve dated, but saying "we went out a few times but didnt really click" seems different from "we dated" which has messier connotations imho. anyway i think its nice and a compliment that he defined your meetings as dates.
 
It's cute when people try to label their relationship and then extract special meaning from that label.
 
How ever many dates it takes to ruffie them.
 
QuietlyBrilliant said:
Hi,

This thread may seem somewhat superficial in comparison to the others on here, but it's just a small query of mine.

I'm currently in University and was just wondering how many dates do you need to have with a person until you've officially 'dated' them. I'm asking because I met this guy out in a club and ended up going back to his (nothing happened) and has his hoodie so had to meet up and we went on one date and then another after that. We have no plans to meet up in the future and don't think we will. If I'm honest, I feel like we only really clicked on the basis that we liked each other's looks (not surprising considering how we met), he was the whole 'captain of the rugby team, gym buff' type of guy and there just wasn't any emotional connection there.

Even though we've only met three times, I did go back to his twice (didn't sleep with him) and there was a lot of sexual chemistry (however, not much else).
So, do I call him a guy I've dated? Or just someone I met a few times? He definitely defined the times we met up as dates.
Click to expand...

Dating (for me) is when two people like each other enough to make a conscious effort to get together in hopes of getting to know each other on a deeper level (potentially to form a relationship). And, it happens over an extended period of time because there is genuine interest in one another.

You weren't getting together with him because you had an amazing mentally or emotionally connection. So, if I were you, I would call him a "hook-up". Because that's what you did.
 
the said:
1 date and you've dated.
Click to expand...

seems to me one date would be "we went on a date" three dates would be "we had a couple of dates" more than that would be "dated".













............but I may be dating myself here.
 
Stu said:
seems to me one date would be "we went on a date" three dates would be "we had a couple of dates" more than that would be "dated".
Click to expand...

Agreed, except I think you meant to say 'two' dates rather than three. Two constitutes a couple. Three or more is dating.
 
You dont call it anything until you both agree it was a date. By your standards I have dated twice the amount of girls than I really did. It makes me wonder if those have been telling people we dated now. Not that I would care, it would just a little odd.
 
Crap this means I dated a girl I used to talk to in the kitchen at work?
 
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