Hormones and Sexual Activity

But I disagree with the point you said in the last thread that at slants age women are a-sexual. Thats really extreme.
I certainly never was, and same goes for many of my female friends. A-sexual means NO sexual wants or desires, period. I don't like this assumption.
 
I didn't want to argue the point on the other thread so I took it into visitor messages with nobleheart; but since this thread exists, I was thinking about it, and the statements that were made were offensive to me because of the following:

if you told a lesbian that most girls at that age are lesbians and that as she gets older she will become heterosexual, this would be a very wrong statement to make. It would make no coherent sense because people do not change their orientation later on it life; then why, is it so compelling for others to justify the same when asexuality is claimed?

I am not trying to point fingers at only you. It is not only you that have stated things like this to me, in fact, a lot of the community believes what you believe and that is why in many ways it may not seem an extreme statement to make.

The reason I was offended is because it assumes my asexuality is, not in fact an orientation, but the result of not being fully developed sexually-- a hormone defect. If I had told you I was a lesbian the same would NEVER have crossed your mind, and that is why, I was so offedned.

Furthermore, it was more insulting to state that women my age are being sexual just to please their male counterparts and that I was the only one being true to myself. Really? I don't think that such a large population of females would be having sex PURELY because they wanted to maintain a relationship. There has to be some sexual feelings involved, and, although the chart you have presented is pressing it does not imply or prove sexual attraction does not happen until after the twenties; the hormones would moreso be representing things like sexual libido. There is no way to measure sexual attraction and the levels that it maintains; women can have perfectly normal hormone levels and be asexual, and the same women with the same hormone levels can have a raging sexual attraction. Hormones have really nothing to do with it.
 
So your asexual I see nothing weird about it. Its not natural but what isn't "natural" anymore.

But those graphs are interesting.
 
On top of that, asexuals may still engage in sexual activity; therefore when persons engage in sexual activity, stating that on average it isn't until someone's twenties, has no relevancy to asexuality which is the lack of sexual attraction to any particular person, sex, or object.
 
slant said:
On top of that, asexuals may still engage in sexual activity; therefore when persons engage in sexual activity, stating that on average it isn't until someone's twenties, has no relevancy to asexuality which is the lack of sexual attraction to any particular person, sex, or object.
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Again I don't disagree.

But I do agree a lot of young people have sex and hop into a relationship because they don't want to be alone or they want to be loved ect. Sex is just a bonus.
 
DoveAlexa said:
But I disagree with the point you said in the last thread that at slants age women are a-sexual. Thats really extreme.
I certainly never was, and same goes for many of my female friends. A-sexual means NO sexual wants or desires, period. I don't like this assumption.
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No, I was stating that it is normal for this to be the case for some women. It is also normal for some women to start having sexual inclinations as early as toddlers, spontaneously developing masturbation skills around the age they learn to walk. There is a lot of range in normal. I was just explaining that Slant's behavior is in fact included in 'normal' and that the range of normal is pretty clearly tied to that individual's hormone levels.

88chaz88 said:
http://www.asexuality.org/home/

It does exist, but is very rare.
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slant said:
On top of that, asexuals may still engage in sexual activity; therefore when persons engage in sexual activity, stating that on average it isn't until someone's twenties, has no relevancy to asexuality which is the lack of sexual attraction to any particular person, sex, or object.
Click to expand...

This actually describes me quite well. I didn't really come into my sexuality until I was about 30.
 
slant said:
I didn't want to argue the point on the other thread so I took it into visitor messages with nobleheart; but since this thread exists, I was thinking about it, and the statements that were made were offensive to me because of the following:
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I only created the thread so I would have a place to link the images - because you can't add images to PMs unless they linked. I was perfectly willing to keep the discussion private.

slant said:
if you told a lesbian that most girls at that age are lesbians and that as she gets older she will become heterosexual, this would be a very wrong statement to make. It would make no coherent sense because people do not change their orientation later on it life; then why, is it so compelling for others to justify the same when asexuality is claimed?
Click to expand...

Actually if you're going to extrapolate what I said to lesbians, it means that lesbian sex drive is likely to function just like that of straight women. They are less likely to be sexually active in their younger years than males, and experience a peak in sexual interest around their mid 30s. This has nothing to do with orientation, just interest and sex drive.

slant said:
I am not trying to point fingers at only you. It is not only you that have stated things like this to me, in fact, a lot of the community believes what you believe and that is why in many ways it may not seem an extreme statement to make.
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Understood.

slant said:
The reason I was offended is because it assumes my asexuality is, not in fact an orientation, but the result of not being fully developed sexually-- a hormone defect. If I had told you I was a lesbian the same would NEVER have crossed your mind, and that is why, I was so offedned.
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Not at all the case. It simply implies that you're on the low end of normal with respect to sex hormone levels. I was the same way when I was younger, and even now I am not especially sexual for a male my age.

slant said:
Furthermore, it was more insulting to state that women my age are being sexual just to please their male counterparts and that I was the only one being true to myself. Really? I don't think that such a large population of females would be having sex PURELY because they wanted to maintain a relationship. There has to be some sexual feelings involved, and, although the chart you have presented is pressing it does not imply or prove sexual attraction does not happen until after the twenties; the hormones would moreso be representing things like sexual libido. There is no way to measure sexual attraction and the levels that it maintains; women can have perfectly normal hormone levels and be asexual, and the same women with the same hormone levels can have a raging sexual attraction. Hormones have really nothing to do with it.
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It is very common for females to accommodate. Obviously this isn't the only reason they would have sex. As mentioned before, some women develop a desire for sexual self satisfaction as toddlers. However, it is a statistical fact that the majority of women in America do not experience their first orgasm until after age 24. Obviously, with this range of statistics there is going to be a lot of difference between individuals. The only thing I'm stating here is that what you've described is in fact 'normal'.
 
Nobleheart said:
No, I was stating that it is normal for this to be the case for some women. It is also normal for some women to start having sexual inclinations as early as toddlers, spontaneously developing masturbation skills around the age they learn to walk. There is a lot of range in normal. I was just explaining that Slant's behavior is in fact included in 'normal' and that the range of normal is pretty clearly tied to that individual's hormone levels.
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Eh, but then, because the range is so varied and there may be enough people at all types and levels of sexual inclination that hormones may have very little to do with it then =\. Or at least using the trends, it like averaging a rainbow, it does not mean the rainbow is brown.

Still, //huggles, not attacking just debating.
 
DoveAlexa said:
Eh, but then, because the range is so varied and there may be enough people at all types and levels of sexual inclination that hormones may have very little to do with it then =\. Or at least using the trends, it like averaging a rainbow, it does not mean the rainbow is brown.

Still, //huggles, not attacking just debating.
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Nah, didn't take it as an attack. You have a presentation style very much like my own. I understand it and respect it.

Even though the trends are varied, the connection between sexual activity/interest and hormone levels is very clear. There is a broad range of both, but the two are almost always related in any individual where ever they are in that range.

Nobleheart said:
No need to apologize. I support your right to feel however you feel. I have a tendency to state likely outcomes as if they are facts. That can come off the wrong way, as I assume everyone understands that no one can fully predict the future.

However, we can predict the most likely course. I was basing my logic off of pattern. Much like the example given, if 99.9% of the ward sweats when they have fever, and one patient doesn't... that's of course possible. Most females don't really begin to develop their sexual hormones until their mid 20s, and don't reach their peak until their mid 30s. At your age, most females are asexual, but will placate their partners in order to maintain relationships. From what you say, it sounds like you're simply being more honest about and true to yourself, and I respect that.
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And just to point out something... at no point did I ever say every woman is the same or falls into these exact states. Notice the use of the word 'most', as I am speaking of trends, not individuals.
 
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