Figuring out someone. | INFJ Forum

Figuring out someone.

Sep 20, 2009

Ok, I'm changing my previous subject because I did not feel very comfortable leaving it out lol. Ok This one is about self-confidence..How do you deal with self-confidence issues? I usually suffer from very low self-confidence and second guess myself a lot. I think of the baddest possible scenerio, and I'm always this an INFJ characteristic?if so how do you battle with this?
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This sounds ridiculous, but you gotta love yourself for the lack of confidence. The fact you second guess yourself is a good thing. So many arrogant people out there, and you actually take time to step outside yourself and critique your actions. This is a good thing, sometimes it will cause you pain but the benefits outweigh the negatives. The second you stop doubting yourself you are telling yourself there is no need to improve.

The key is not to harp on that doubt or let it take over too much. If you are constantly doubting, this can be bad and painful. Just love the fact you have the range of perception to hate yourself, accept it, and don't dwell.
Start with the little things and keep a journal to record your little victories. It can be stuff like making a phonecall you have been putting off, going to a new restaurant or trying a new recipe. Aim to do one small thing a day that you will feel good about, make sure to write down what you did and how good it made you feel. Actually do this - it's easy to think, oh that sounds useful I'll try that, but then not do it (I'm an expert in that field), but if you actually do it you will feel better - it quickly snowballs into a much higher self-esteem - you'll soon start to want to tackle more challenging tasks and consequently feel even better about yourself.

As for imagining the worst scenario, cognitive therapy is the best thing for tackling this. You can go the self-help route - plenty of good books available, or you can find a cognitive therapist to work with. Have a look on the web to find out more - that could be your simple task for today if you want. :) Good luck anyway. I know what it's like, but you can feel better if you work on it.
You tricked me....