Do you have difficulty telling a loved one how you feel about them?
- Thread starter Gaze
- Start date
It's difficult for me to initiate a relationship because I'm worried I'm going to upset them in the attempt by making them feel obligated, put upon, guilty for shooting me down, annoyed by another guy taking a shot, etc. etc. And since I don't want to initiate something with someone until I am sure I want to keep them, it makes it really difficult.
When I am certain someone will be receptive, I have no problem initiating. The problem is always figuring that out in the process of getting to know if I am interested in them.
I don't think it's always that easy to express a feeling. Sometimes, there's fear of the response, not sure if the person feels as much as you, whether they want the relationship to change or remain the same. I don't want to be the first person to admit feelings, since that's never worked in my favor. But revealing feelings can make someone feel obligated to feel the same. And that's something I wouldn't want.
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The closest I've ever been in a relationship was a woman that pretty much grabbed me by the ears and told me she was interested(Still a wonderful friend after we broke up).
Reading attraction has always been one of my greatest difficulties. Makes one wonder how many opportunities are missed due to mixed signals. It doesn't help if you come off as a bit severe, I've been told I do and that I am unapproachable. This coupled with the kaleidoscope of thoughts bouncing around in the ole skull makes my timing feel off or completely disinterested in someone I am attracted to.
Sometimes I just jot down a poem on a napkin, then hand it off to the woman I'm interested in with a smile and move on. If she's moved by my words and interested she just has to call, if she thinks I'm a wierdo and doesn't at least there is none of that strange rejection vibe.
I don't know why, but those words feel extremely awkward coming out of my mouth. I usually only say it to my mom.
Agree. I don't say that kind of stuff to my family. But it doesn't mean I don't feel it. I'm just not a fan of expressing those feelings verbally. Which is probably not good.
1. they might not want to be told
2. they might not reciprocate
3. it can change the dynamic of the relationship for the worse
also i kind of prefer more indirect and subtle ways of being told that i'm cared about, and sometimes i assume that's what others want; being explicitly told that i'm loved can be "too much" (does anyone know what I mean?)
it depends a lot on the person though, with some people i do say it outright.
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Extremely difficult or me
I have enough issues initiating friendships as of now. Confessing my feelings to someone is even harder. It might make the relation now seem awkward, they might not take it well, just overall paranoia and fear etc, there is a variety of reasons, some subconscious which prevent me from forming a relation.
I have enough issues initiating friendships as of now. Confessing my feelings to someone is even harder. It might make the relation now seem awkward, they might not take it well, just overall paranoia and fear etc, there is a variety of reasons, some subconscious which prevent me from forming a relation.
I have a lot of trouble expressing how I feel to people. I'm bad with words when it comes to things like that. I either say something too extreme or don't feel as if I say enough. When I talk to people I really like I always end up staring at them with all these words stumbling around in my head. When I try to let them out I just end up saying something cliche which annoys me to no end.
I never have to say a word because my feelings seep from every pore in my body, but I do say how I feel anyways without too much of a problem. I mean, leading up to telling people how I feel I get a bit nervous, but once I start the words just keep coming out.