You're probably better in the field than you think you are... At least you have standards.
That's true- there have been quite a few things where other people seemed to think I was much more competent at something than I felt. I've been trying to figure out why I lack confidence even when I have high standards and pay attention to detail, when other people have all this confidence when they don't know what they hell they're doing. I think part of it could be that when I know something, I often know it intuitively- I can't always explain the process by which I know, but it just sort of comes to me after learning about something and I know what to do. But because that's not a very scientific way of explaining it, I haven't been considering that valid knowledge. After reading about type for the past couple months, maybe that's a mistake, and I should trust myself as an intelligent person even though I often don't memorize facts to back up what I think.
Speaking of non-scientifically accepted things, I used to be really interested in energy & sound healing. I learned some of it, and when people asked me to do it on them, they loved it- especially sound healing- I had some friends in college who would always ask me to do reiki on them, and my grandmas were telling everyone that the sound healing cured their sciatica and one woman said it started clearing up her glaucoma after one 10-min session. However, whatever awesome things they were feeling, I didn't feel that myself, and I certainly didn't have such amazing experiences when I had energy work done on me. I really couldn't observe or feel how this was so good for people, and because I couldn't cure myself of my issues, I didn't feel valid in doing it. I let it die out from a potential career into a hobby into not really doing it anymore.
There's always more to know, can't know everything, unfortunately.
At first I agreed that this is unfortunate, but then I thought, if I really achieved my goal in knowing
everything, what purpose would I have anymore? Maybe it's better that we can't know everything, because we always have something to keep us going.
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astrelune - And today, you do have to be careful about expecting too much because you're rarely going to have people in a workplace in environments who live up to these high, and sometimes unrealistic expectations we may have. Over the years, I've realized that I can't control how anyone else performs. I can only be responsible for myself. And sometimes, people have too much else going on in their lives to be able to be perfect in every area. They do just do they best they can and hope it's enough. Also, companies have a bad habit of taking advantage of the hard working employee rather than rewarding them. They tend to just expect more and more with less incentives. So, that's why many people are putting as much effort in to a job as they once did because they don't want to be used. Many today are in the position of havnig to give 300% to jobs which pay very little, offers very little advancement or upward mobility, or where they are expected to put up with quite a bit because they can't simply leave to go elsewhere. Realistically, it will get tiring after a while giving A effort to a job that makes you feel as if you're just another cog in the wheel. So, it's not always that people don't have high standards for themselves or don't want to do well, it's because they have too much to balance or worry about to be good at everything. Someone may expend a lot of effort in their family and personal lives, and so they may not feel they have enough to give their jobs their full effort. But people's lives are also more complicated today. Everything is not always as simple as it would seem.
This is the reason why I hated being a manager- it's so difficult to get people to do their work up to not only my standards- but to basic standards to make things run properly. No matter how many times I showed and reminded people, there would always be someone else, (when I had a good crew) often from another shift, messing things up and lowering the standard again. As far as taking advantage of the hard worker goes, it's not only companies that do that- at my old job it was the other employees who were the culprit. I had one employee who was such a hard worker, that even when it was decided that she would stop taking tables and leave first, by the end of the shift she would still be there doing side work (which means she did more work than everyone else, since she started clean-up first). Eventually I had to start watching for this and actually stop her from working and send her home, so other people would do their fair share. But it's tough because you can't always monitor the exact amount of work someone is doing, if you get busy with something else, the slackers start slacking again, and the hard workers start picking up that slack.
8 hours a day, 5 days a week, 50 (considering vacations) weeks a year = 2000 hours. That's about 1/2 of your average awake period in a year that you will spend in your career.
Do you really want to spend half your life simply being practical? Careers should have less to do with practicality and more to do with passion.
Some of the most successful people I've met have chosen some of the least practical careers and educational paths they could. "Animal Welfare? The f*** is that good for??" yet these people are highly regarded, knowledgeable and looked to as experts in their field.
That's so true- my last career was for a combination of money and other pressure, and it was destroying me. I felt burnt out all the time- who burns out in their 20s?? Isn't that not supposed to happen until middle-age? (not that it should happen at all- I would rather it didn't). Anyways, my last job showed me that I won't survive a career that I hate again unless I destroy a part of myself, and I don't want to do that.
What do these animal welfare people do for work? That's something I'm really passionate about, and I would love to be able to make a difference beyond what changing my own lifestyle has.
You can study until your eyes bleed, but it won't give you experience. I believe it is in "doing" where you will really see your strengths and weaknesses. Also in "doing" windows of opportunity may open that you may never have thought of prior. Find one of your areas that interest you and volunteer (if you aren't already.)
I was not quite sure how I would handle my cases as a CASA. As time and experience went on, my supervisor trusted me to handle extremely complicated cases that required a lot of research. I always had a fondness of research; however before my volunteer work I only found the practical application of research in my genealogy. There are so many elements that go into this volunteer work that I had only "studied" about in college: collaboration with other agencies on information, writing, interviewing, BOUNDARIES (omg I cannot stress that enough), etc. My window of opportunity? Careers. I have been offered various jobs by the people with whom I network (however working is not possible right now.) My supervisor would like to see me go back to school to become a lawyer. lol (Don't know how I feel about that.)
Not only do I gain the experience, but I know I'm contributing something back to my community and that feels fantastic.
I agree that experience is key- and not getting experience in my education is what (in my opinion) has made it inadequate, and is what prevented me from really developing practical confidence in my knowledge (though I definitely need both- if I don't understand it on an intellectual level I have a hard time feeling confident in it as well). I'll see if I can find any volunteer opportunities (that don't require me to pay them huge amounts of money).
[MENTION=1669]Genuine[/MENTION] & Gktr - I don't want to be in debt, so being practical is definitely a concern of mine as well. I know I'll need to find a balance, but I can't justifying giving up what's important to me just to pay the bills if I haven't given my ideals a good shot (well, I could, but I would regret it, and I don't want to have any more regrets).
So I say pursue it. I don't know if I can help you out in any area regarding conflicting desire for career as I love my major, I love the things it has me doing, and it fulfills me while also being a "practical" career choice (special education). But I also find satisfaction pursuing music, writing, and painting, and I consider my art my main job and calling. I just don't make any money off of it, aside from ticket prices at the door of venues (you kind of have to compromise on that) the stuff I do is free, as I believe free art is art in its purest form. But try getting involved in wherever your muse pulls you. Form a band, find local theaters and try out for their shows (based on what you just said, it sounds like you'd enjoy that). I've found the most liberating way to create is not to create for any audience but yourself. Play for your muse. And if others listen, that's great. But your most important fan will always be your muse.
It actually helps me to hear from people who have found a passion and love what they're doing- seeing others similar to me (i.e. with the same personality type), but in a good place gives me hope that I can find something right for me too.
As far as creating for yourself/muse, I really like that way of looking at it, and that's how I used to be when I was a kid- singing, drawing, and dancing, completely unaware of others, just doing it because I wanted to. I think that's how art is meant to be- it's not about being "the best", just being.
