Default Trust | INFJ Forum

Default Trust

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by Ergo Christobal, May 28, 2010.

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  1. Ergo Christobal

    Ergo Christobal Talking Lightbulb
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    How much do you trust strangers? I have observed that compared to most, I've got a pretty high default trust for any human being that I meet. I think it might be my ability to sense character, and I'm usually right. Other than that, most of my friends find my complete trust in people strange. Furthermore, I put plenty of effort into keeping honest to strangers, and I feel that this trust combined with my willingness to help makes people be more honest around me.

    By honest, I mean asking "hey can you hold <belongings> for a sec?" and knowing that they won't run off with anything or "could you watch this suitcase" or saying "sure, you can borrow this" or confiding things in people and trusting them to not betray you.

    My behavior might be a bit reckless, such as not locking my car all the time or talking to random strangers and believing what they say but I never see anything wrong with it. I might risk my well-being to help someone or do similar things in other situations that involves trusting someone without knowing them. Personal secrets are different, it takes a little while until I can tell anyone anything like that.

    Let's say that you just met me, What's the biggest thing you would trust me with? do you usually trust random people, or do you maintain a certain level of suspicion? Why? what do you think of overly trusting people?
     
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  2. Gaze

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    Like most kids I guess, I was raised to be very cautious about people, to be mindful and careful. It was necessary but as time passes, I realized that it turned me into a worry wort, and sometimes, made me a bit too paranoid. I'd become suspicious about the smallest things. It's half and half though. I can be very trusting, almost tooooooo trusting (naive), but also overly cautious. I think it's partly because I'm not sure I can read people well, so I worry I won't be able to trust my own judgment. But it's hard to strike a balance in terms of who to trust, where and when. So, yeah.
     
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    #2 Gaze, May 28, 2010
    Last edited: May 28, 2010
  3. Skathac

    Skathac <font color=#27A601>Community Member</font>

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    It depends. In the world I trust no one I first meet. As nice as they appear they might want to drug me and drag me back to their place and do very disturbing things to me all night or enjoy my kidneys with some faba beans. So I'm always mindful and ready to react. Given time and conversation they can move into the not a threat zone yet still high alert. In an undetermined amount of time they may or may not move into the safe and medium to low alert zone but its very difficult to make it that far. Further is nigh on impossible.
     
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    Ergo Christobal

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    To you more cautious types:
    Have you ever had your trust betrayed in a major way? If so, do you think this might affect your trust in others? If you were raised this way, do you feel that it's still necessary?

    Also, what does it take to leave the "danger zone"? One conversation, two, a few weeks?
     
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  5. Gaze

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    It also probably depends on where you grew up and what you were taught. If you grew up in a pretty safe area, and didn't have to worry about violence, danger of safety issues, etc. then you're likely to be a little more trusting and less suspicious (i think). But if you grew in an area where safety was a major issue, then you're likely to be taught that you need to be more suspicious and less trusting.

    It also depends on job/occupation or the architecture of the workplace. Some occupations have a higher security risks so more precautions need to be taken to keep your self safe. Or if the area/location where you work has a higher chance of crime being committed because of the physical layout and location, then there's going to be more suspicion and caution taken.

    So, it depends.
     
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    #5 Gaze, May 28, 2010
    Last edited: May 28, 2010
  6. Skathac

    Skathac <font color=#27A601>Community Member</font>

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    Yes and yes. I was raised to be wary but my experiences in life have probably made me very distrustful towards other humans for the most part. I probably come off alot different on these message boards but I really cannot feel threatened when I'm not meeting someone in person.

    Leaving the danger zone is entirely dependent on a case by case basis. Can't put a numerical value on it.
     
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    Ergo Christobal

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    Would you say that humans are creatures of their environment? I mean, sure people are different on an individual basis but if so much can be changed by how they grew up or how they were treated... What does that say about us?
     
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  8. Jonathan

    Jonathan Community Member

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    I'm usually a really good judge of character, but I'm always cautious, just to be safe. When I meet someone for the first time, I usually pick up on thier general 'trustworthiness' right away. However, I don't just trust my judgement right away, especially when I'm in a particularly optimistic mood when I know I'm likely to be more trusting than I should. That has gotten me into trouble before. So, I just take it slow for a while, but I'll decide whether or not to trust someone a lot faster than most people I know, and I'm usually right.
    The danger zone depends on how my impressions of the preson change over time as I let my intuition learn more about them. There are some people I feel like I can open up to within a single conversation (this is pretty rare), and others I'll probably never open up to because I always get bad vibes from them.
     
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