All my life I have tested INFJ but recently I thought to myself I sould take the test again.
Wow! I took both test 2X and I am now an INFP. Is that even possible?
I hope so because I am changing forums. Lol!
INFP
Introvert(72%) iNtuitive(16%) Feeling(47%) Perceiving(9%)
- You have distinct preference of Introversion over Extraversion (72%)
- You have slight preference of Intuition over Sensing (16%)
- You have moderate preference of Feeling over Thinking (47%)
- You have slight preference of Perceiving over Judging (9%)
YOUR PERSONALITY TYPE IS:
MEDIATOR (INFP-T)
No one can stop you from dreaming!
MIND
This trait determines how we interact with our environment.
19%
81%
INTROVERTED
ENERGY
This trait shows where we direct our mental energy.
84%
INTUITIVE
16%
NATURE
This trait determines how we make decisions and cope with emotions.
17%
83%
FEELING
TACTICS
This trait reflects our approach to work, planning and decision-making.
39%
JUDGING
61%
PROSPECTING
IDENTITY
This trait underpins all others, showing how confident we are in our abilities and decisions.
47%
ASSERTIVE
53%
I do believe that you can change from being an INFJ to an INFP. While I do realize the two personality types are quite different, it's important to remain open-minded to the idea that people do change, and there are many ways for this to occur.
My story is quite long and it would take several books to adequately articulate everything, so I'll just do my best to be brief and I'll copy/paste a few posts I have already made on Quora at the end of this response to provide some background for added insight/understanding.
I was born an INFJ in 1980. I was abused throughout my childhood and the nature of that abuse stunted the development of my personality. I lived as an INFJ for 35 years, then I spent 3 years in relative isolation in devotion to deep study on a wide range of topics. The path I took is called "The Heroes Journey" and it resulted in Ego Death and Epiphany. It was, without question, the most impactful experience of my life. These experiences provided me with the answers to questions that had previously left me filled with angst. I spent my entire life as an INFJ and I am very aware of the pros/cons that come with having this personality type.
After 35 years of life as an INFJ (confirmed with consistent results using different tests over a span of 20+ years), I am now getting equally consistent results of INFP. One of the markers of an INFJ is an ability to absorb emotions from those around them, but they aren't typically as in tune with their own feelings/emotions, and that creates a real dilemma when it comes to expressing the way one views themselves in relationship to the world around them. My experience has completely changed me, and I now understand myself at a very deep level. It took me nearly my entire life up until this point to find true confidence, to cast away the fear of the unknown that I had been running from throughout my life. The process of explaining this to others is something I have all but given up on, because I have found that most people think they understand when it is so obviously clear that they simply do not. I have refrained from talking about my experience because, inevitably, there will always come someone trolling along to make anonymous, empirical claims about things they themselves are incapable of comprehending. In order to understand, one would need to rid themselves of their "self" (ego), and most people simply are unwilling to do that.
Anyways, I won't take up too much more time. I'm going to paste a couple posts I made on Quora shortly after my epiphany on Veterans Day 2018 so you can see what I am referring to. Also, it's worth noting that I am uncertain for sure whether I am an INFJ or an INFP. I think the process of learning deeply about myself allowed me to rid myself of the turbulence that allowed for me to remain an INFJ. The fact that I seek virtue in all things means being constantly aware of my behaviors, their potential impact, and I no longer value the same things I used to. It's also worth noting that I am almost certainly an empath. Part of me hates to put myself into a box by assigning myself to a category with a specific name, but our human minds are very limited and sometimes it's the best way to articulate facts, ideas/concepts. It's not like I forgot how to be an INFJ. It doesn't take much for something to touch my heart in a way that results in crying. In fact, I feel more emotion now as an INFP than I ever did as an INFJ, but that's likely due to the fact that I have kept the strengths of INFJ (Introverted Intuition, Extraverted Feeling, Introverted Thinking, Extraverted Sensing) and complemented them with the inverse dominant traits of the INFP. It's pretty overwhelming to say the least. Quite often I see/sense/feel things before they happen and it's not always easy to convince others to believe me based merely on my intuitive gut feeling combined. Then again, it's no longer just a gut feeling at this point.
Here is a question I answered on Quora about a year or so ago:
Is a child raised by a narcissistic parent doomed to a life of mental illness?
I am going to copy/paste the answer I provided to a similar question about a year ago. I have learned quite a bit since typing this answer, as my understanding has been refined over time as I continue to delve in deeper. The story you are about to read involves years of deep study in search of truth. My “call to adventure” came in 2015, and although the story you are about to read does not go into much detail on that, I do plan to write a book about my experience. I refer to my experience as an epiphany, but after taking several months to acquire additional knowledge, I now understand that the precursor to this life-changing, permanently mind-altering state was an “ego death”. Many people claim to experience a state of ego death after using psychedelics like LSD, psilocybin, ayahuasca, and things of the sort. There’s even a documentary on Netflix called The Mind Explained, and the last episode covers this at a very high level over a period of about 15–20 minutes. In my opinion, there is no magic pill, but rather the individual must be motivated by intention. However, I do believe that psychedelics can, at a minimum, bring one’s mind to an ideal state to facilitate the process. My ego death was almost purely natural in that it occurred over the course of several years, and with several contributing factors, most all of which I truly feel were helpful and necessary.
It’s tough to talk about these things because I am keenly aware of the fact that, as I discuss it, many(seemingly most all) people simply will not understand what I am saying because I am attempting to explain the unexplainable. The significance of an ego death cannot be overstated, but I must also be careful not to invest too much time insisting that everyone else pursue one, for I know that by doing so I will only drive myself crazy. It is impossible to explain an experience that takes place almost entirely in a place that is unknown to most people, but I truly believe this to be the most important discovery one can make and that makes it hard to keep it to myself because it stands to end suffering for anyone/everyone, regardless of their circumstances. It requires time and energy that many do not wish to sacrifice, and a willingness to remain in a perpetual state of self-analysis. Ego (Self) prevents most people from ever reaching step 1: Considering any information that makes them feel less than positive. The Ego is a filter that information passes through before it is processed, and it places no value on virtue because it’s purpose is to protect us from threats made to our self-image. If preserving self-image (the illusion of who we think we are) is the goal, then life is rather meaningless, and if we are unaware of this illusion we will remain there. No amount of money can fix such a situation, and anyone who thinks otherwise only deludes themselves.
I spent my life in a state of self-sabotage because I was taught not to value myself from a young age. I’ve always hated myself and I know there are many out there who can relate. I have done many things I am ashamed of; things I would never dream of doing today. Many times, I behaved like a narcissist, and I intentionally surrounded myself with the most vile people I could find. All the while, the far more desirable, genuine, albeit fragmented/severely underdeveloped personality within me provided me with a deep sense of hatred for who I had become. It made it difficult for me to want to go on living. I knew what I was doing all along and I hated myself while I was doing those things. Being in the presence of people who were in the process of planning/committing despicable acts, yet pretending to be one of them but all-the-while hating what they were doing and feeling sick to my stomach about it. After I left that crowd, I journeyed over to the opposite side of the spectrum when I decided to convert to a Southern Baptist. I attended church multiple times a week, entered into training to become a deacon, and I even decided to enroll in the largest evangelical Christian university in the world. I later transferred to a smaller school (still Baptist though), where I would later receive an undergraduate degree. For several years of my life, I also played the part of a Latino womanizer; speaking very fluent Spanish with virtually no trace of an American accent. I only listened to Spanish music, watched Spanish TV/Movies, hung around people who spoke the language, etc. The list goes on…
As you can see, I played the part of many different characters, and that enabled me to place myself into unique scenarios that most people simply wouldn’t even consider being part of. The story is too long to tell, but it’s worth at least mentioning that it happened because it truly allowed me to see life from a variety of odd angles/perspectives. My desire for acceptance drove me to adopt the many personas, and even though I look back on those personalities with disgust, it actually helps me relate to a wider range of people, but I’ll wait until I write a book before going into further detail.
For now, please feel free to take some time to read this very high level write-up of my experience:
My mother divorced my narcissist father when my little brother and I were 12 and 6, respectively. While he did physically beat my mom and myself, the emotional abuse had far more lasting effects, but I was only truly capable of seeing this 6 months ago. I’ll explain.
I left home to join the military shortly after completing high school without first developing the tools to cope with the difficult situations I would inevitably encounter. For most of my life I have gravitated towards and subconsciously revered those who I perceived as being cool, calm, and collected. I walked through life filled with angst because I did not like the person I was and many of the things I was doing. I was constantly seeking the approval of others, justifying my every action/word, and striving to obtain validation from those I was around. Instead of being myself around others, I became whoever I needed to be in that moment to obtain a desired response. I was pretending to be someone I was not because I wanted people to like me. This is one of many behaviors someone raised by a narcissist may demonstrate.
People raised by narcissists tend to struggle with placating, appeasing, people pleasing, etc., and I believe this is due to a failure to develop a genuine personality. I learned from a young age that being myself would result in a physical beating, being ridiculed, humiliated, or experiencing some form of bullying from my father. To counter this, I placed my desires, wants, needs, likes/dislikes on the back burner and attempted to mirror his personality, and I quickly found that this resulted in gaining his favor. However, the abuse didn’t stop, it just changed. This confused me because much of the time I was just doing or saying the exact same things that my father was doing.
Not developing a personality is a serious issue. I was filled with an immense amount of angst, and I knew deep down that something was not right with me. My father took me to a shrink when I was 9 and I was diagnosed with bipolar depression and anxiety. The doctor failed to consider narcissistic abuse as a possible source. This misdiagnosis marked the beginning of a 27 year stretch of prescription antipsychotics, antidepressants, and benzodiazepenes, and hid the true source of the problems I was experiencing. The abuse continued and I have spent my life being viewed by my father as a kid with “a lot of problems”.
So, I spent 15 years away from my childhood hometown and returned when I was 33. I had seen my dad during the time I was away, but only for brief periods of time. It’s important to remember that I never cut my dad out of my life and as far as either of us was concerned there was no issue between us. Up until that point in my life, I viewed everything that happened to me as my own fault. I played down the abuse I experienced throughout childhood by telling myself “It’s okay, everyone has their own issues.”, but the problem is that viewing things that way was simply not precise enough. I was not naming the issue that was going on. I had swept everything under the rug, just like everyone else had done for my father, and I had avoided ever addressing the true source.
When I was 34 I landed a very good job at a place filled with emotionally healthy people. A year later I resumed my master’s degree and that helped take my mind to a place of deep thought. I began to live life more deliberately, pursuing truth in all things and endeavoring to be honest with everyone in all my relationships. It’s not that I was not being honest before, only this time I had decided to start being honest with myself. Instead of living on the extreme ends of the spectrum (mild temper: pushover, harsh temper: rude), I chose to find the “golden mean” by being assertive. I did this for all things and it impacted my existing relationships. Over time I began to see that I had developed and maintained many of my relationships on the premise that I would never say anything to anyone that could cause them to feel bad about themselves. The problem in doing this is that a good friend has the courage to tell their friends the hard truth, in a kind way that comes from a loving place, of course. In the past, I found that when I did this, it usually resulted in the person reacting harshly by attacking me if I attempted to provide advice. I had subconsciously befriended narcissists throughout my life; I was a magnet for people like this because I made them feel good about themselves.
The problem with this is that sometimes people do need to feel bad. If they wrong me, I need to be able to convey to them that they have done so, and any decent person would be receptive and willing to acknowledge the truth in the matter, so they can fix the issue. This never happened in most of my relationships, because preserving their false self-image was more important than abiding in the truth. I saw this happening in real-time and it frustrated me to my core because I view it as a moral issue that challenges my own personal inner system of values. It really bothers me when I can see something that is fundamentally false, kindly bring it up to suggest the other person consider that it is false, only to have that information thrown back at me. There have been numerous times when these people have literally changed facts in the moment to create an alternate reality that fits the way they feel in that moment. After all, if one can convince themselves that anything can be subjective, it gives that person an out to say that something is simply your opinion, even if it is a fundamental and inarguable truth.
When I finished my master’s degree a couple years ago, it left me with an eagerness to learn and a lot of free time. I used that free time to study my own life, to analyze each relationship, the behaviors commonly demonstrated by the people in my life, the repeated trends I had experienced, etc. In addition to doing this, I spent a lot of time learning about various subjects like consciousness, mindfulness, reality, truth, philosophy, politics, history, etc. I began to realize that these were the things that truly interested me, and it had taken me 37 years to see it.
On Veteran’s Day 2018, I had an epiphany. Many people refer to these as “aha moments” or simply as a part of life where one experiences a “coming to knowledge” of some sort. I feel like my experience was much more than that though. In addition to providing me with answers to some very key questions regarding my life, the epiphany also enabled me to become the person I always wanted to be. I could finally begin to live life at full potential, with confidence, self-efficacy, without people pleasing. I was able to shed these issues that had plagued me throughout all my life, and the difference was incredible. This was the result of years of deliberate, hard work; a struggle towards the truth no matter what the cost and a willingness to view everything as it was, even if it meant admitting that I had been doing it wrong my entire life. I can tell you that it was the most important moment of my life, even more important than the births of my 3 children. After all, I cannot be the best father if I am not being true to myself, and the post-epiphany version of myself is far superior than the pre-epiphany version. In addition to increased self-confidence, made possible through application of what I have learned which also led to some serious self-efficacy, I feel as though I unlocked additional IQ points. It’s as though I now have access to those parts of my brain that were bottle-necked by the area that never developed as a child. When I had the epiphany, I cried quite a bit. I went back and relived several moments of my childhood, only this time I was able to see my father and his intentions through a lens of increased wisdom and understanding. I plan to write a book about my experience. In fact, I plan to become a writer because that is something else I have found I enjoy doing now. It’s amazing what we can achieve once we realize our own potential. I have never given myself enough credit and I have certainly restricted my potential to succeed by creating artificial barriers in the form of mental hurdles.
To set the table for a mind-altering epiphany like this, I believe it is important to establish a foundation for one’s life that is based on courageous truth-seeking because events typically play out in our lives in a manner that aligns with objective reality. I have used the last few years of my life as a research study. Five years ago, I weighed 195 lbs., and could cleanly bench press 405 lbs. The reason I was able to achieve that was simply because I wanted to; I set a goal, put my mind to it, worked hard, never quit, and eventually I got there. Today, I am 170 lbs. and I doubt I could bench press half that weight. I recognize that I need to get back in shape again, and I have already made plans to do so, but I would never give up the knowledge/information I know now, just to get back the body I once had. I am WAY more secure now than the 195 lb. bodybuilder who constantly looked in the mirror and purposely wore clothes that were 1 size too small just to “show off the guns”. In fact, I am annoyed by my old self, and anyone that only knew me at that point in my life is shocked to meet me today, not because I look so much different, but because of how much my personality has changed in result of my epiphany.
I had to place myself into isolation to complete a master’s while working full time and raising a family in a split custody parenting situation. If you look throughout history, you’ll see that most of the greatest intellectual achievements were thought up while the person was in isolation. There is great value to be found in isolation because to understand the world around us we must first understand ourselves. Any attempt to do otherwise is the same as building a house on a bed of quicksand.
When people delude themselves, they create a scenario that allows them to avoid dealing with the truth of an issue. This is a huge problem in the world today and it’s having serious effects on society, but I’ve studied that pretty in depth and I am confident it will backfire. By identifying what I had truly gone through, I was able to fix myself because I understood the situation. I realized that I did not have to remain as I was, and that I could be just like those I had always looked up to. For the longest time I felt I was doomed to be the way I was; that all the quirks and weird “isms” about me were just handed down as part of my inheritance as the son of my father. I spent my entire life with a broken spirit and I was being prescribed bipolar medication to address it, when instead I just simply needed to view reality as it was, accept it, then make the changes. I didn’t need to settle, and I most certainly did not need to place my value in how others viewed me. I just needed to be able to accept who I was, follow a sound value system that involves being genuine, caring, loving, honest, truthful, etc. If I did all those things and made it my life’s purpose to continue doing them, then anytime I ran into an issue with someone my awareness would be raised, and I would realize that a hostile response to a truth claim made respectfully out of love for that person, is likely an issue with them, not me.
Much love,
Ricky
So, to answer your question: Anyone can change and NO ONE IS DOOMED.
That which you most need will be found where you least want to look -Carl Jung
