Compassion - what does it mean to you?

[Kgal]

[MENTION=5224]Sadie[/MENTION]

This short video showed up in my facebook feed. They are explaining why when one practices compassion - the act of practicing - it actually increases the ability to have compassion. I just realized it works to increase the compassion for one's self too.

[video=youtube;J8rxqucWF6c]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J8rxqucWF6c&feature=share[/video]

 

[#@&5&49]

[MENTION=2578]Kgal[/MENTION],

I totally agree with that. Healing has nothing to do with giving and receiving. It's just about healing energy that's moving back and forth. YES, when we give to someone we give to ourselves and when we are cruel to someone, we are cruel to ourselves. What we give to others is a reflection of what we give to ourselves - positive or negative. I don't think healing is about being "a healer". It's just an exchange of energy that all people are capable of.

Sometimes I really get mad at the fact that I feel compassion for someone that I'm currently angry with. That paradox is sometimes just too much for me to hold onto and I have to turn off the compassion (which isn't always easy) so I can feel and express that I'm angry with someone. I have a tendency to flip back and forth between the two because those opposing emotions are just too much for me to have simultaneously. I'll say things like "I'm angry with you because..., but I understand because..." at the same time which gives people mixed messages. Part of me is saying that's not okay with me and the other part is saying it's okay I understand. I definitely need some fine tuning there! I'm working on it and I know it's possible :becky:

Thanks for the vid.

 

[#@&5&49]

As I think more about compassion, where it comes from, what it means to me, developing it, nourishing it, and even stifling it, I realized that as I walk through some profound wounds in myself and my life the end result is always a deepened sense of compassion. When I acknowledge my own suffering I am able to acknowledge the suffering in other people. This is the reward. If I am closed to aspects of my own suffering I am also unable to acknowledge that suffering in others.

Some compassion for me has been an obligation either personal or professional. In thinking about this difference I realized that true compassion has no justification or rationalization attached to it. It simply just IS. It flows as effortless as the tide and is as clear as glass. It is beauty in it's purest form. Compassion is what human beings are at their very best. This is our reward for walking through our own pain. We get to experience the very best of what it means to be human. We get to be a compassionate being.

A compassionate person is a vulnerable person. Strength is not in building walls, it's breaking walls down and having the courage to stand without walls. I have often wondered what the purpose of my own journey has been. Everything I've been through and experienced, what does suffering mean. Now I get it.

Thanks for all your posts everyone and sharing your thoughts and experiences.

 

[Blackmountainside]

it’s about looking deeper: knowing there’s always more. sometimes this means keeping your mouth shut. (it’s easy to ridicule, resent... ). but it’s better to understand/feel. not always easy – try working in child protection. sound judgment and careful assessment is paramount – need to have your head on straight. but two separate things really. compassion is caring for the person that everyone else has kicked to the curb. and then you pick them up.

 

[Trifoilum]

Um.

Something I need to train myself in.
Um.

No idea, really. The ability to reach someone.

but all these are interesting things. So they can be trained..?

...What does compassion feel?
Does it feel draining? replenishing? freeing? binding? strengthening? weakening?

 

[#@&5&49]

it’s about looking deeper: knowing there’s always more. sometimes this means keeping your mouth shut. (it’s easy to ridicule, resent... ). but it’s better to understand/feel. not always easy – try working in child protection. sound judgment and careful assessment is paramount – need to have your head on straight. but two separate things really. compassion is caring for the person that everyone else has kicked to the curb. and then you pick them up.

My father used to say "keep your eyes and your ears open and your mouth shut". I often think of that after an embarrassing episode of verbal diarrhea. :redface: I'm working on curbing inclinations to judge. The more I practice, the more aware I am becoming of not only changing my position from judgment to compassion, but it's also changing my outlook on life. It's also changing me.

 

[#@&5&49]

What does compassion feel? Does it feel draining? replenishing? freeing? binding? strengthening? weakening?

For me, at this moment in time (and this can change at any moment) it feels like love washing over me like a wave and it feels like peace. A peace like no other that I've felt before.

 

[Blackmountainside]

My father used to say "keep your eyes and your ears open and your mouth shut". I often think of that after an embarrassing episode of verbal diarrhea. :redface: I'm working on curbing inclinations to judge. The more I practice, the more aware I am becoming of not only changing my position from judgment to compassion, but it's also changing my outlook on life. It's also changing me.

when i was a teenager i used to feel deeply for people (people in pain, suffering, unfortunate life circumstances) and it would really hit me hard. sometimes it would overwhelm me. at 27, i still feel this way. but i have developed a clearer way of understanding complex systems (this can be useful when you're trying to help someone).

but sometimes things exist outside legible systems - and it becomes more difficult to trace the path. when you feel compassion here - at this place - it's pretty damn raw.

 

[Tactical Panda]

For me it means for a short time losing myself in another's world - feeling their concerns and situations and in doing so developing both understanding and appreciation of who they are. For me it means a warm and wonderous part of what it means to be human.

I don't exercise it much. /facepalm

 

[Odyne]

Truth is....I am filled to the brim with compassion. I didn't realize this until someone pointed out to me the things I got myself involved in and for what purposes. The way I get so riled up and angry when I see wrong-doings or some harsh living conditions. My compassion, however, very rarely manifests on a personal level. I wish and work for the betterment of my community, my kind and species, and for the people who are very close and precious to me. That's it.

I don't go out of my way to reach out to people on a personal level, unless they are important to me in one form or another; friends, family, lovers. I don't think I would be of great help for one-on-one mentoring or counselling. I hate being so close with people. But often, you'd find me running the show from behind the scenes. Getting your organization media coverage, marketing, fundraising for your cause, dealing with bureaucracy. It's what I am good at. I don't think I am one to touch people's hearts and make them feel better.




My career is as detached as it gets and I'd like to keep it that way, I think I would go insane if I had to deal with people on a daily basis. It's a strange thing really, I strive for the betterment of humanity but I don't want to deal with humans on an individual level.









I don't understand your last question; What's a higher level of compassion? Self-sacrifice? If so, I don't think it's for anyone, and I think it's an extremely dangerous thought.

 

[#@&5&49]

I once heard someone say that to reach the highest level of compassion one would have to be God or Buddha. If this is true, then I was wondering how close can a human being come to this level of compassion. I mean are we capable as human beings of ever reaching that level of compassion or is our time here just about trying to come close. Just some philosophical questions.

 

[Kgal]

I once heard someone say that to reach the highest level of compassion one would have to be God or Buddha. If this is true, then I was wondering how close can a human being come to this level of compassion. I mean are we capable as human beings of ever reaching that level of compassion or is our time here just about trying to come close. Just some philosophical questions.

The highest level of compassion? I've never heard anyone grade the levels of compassion. Never...
I don't think there is any such thing....

My teachings speak of ever widening circles starting with practicing compassion for one's Self and radiating outward to all sentient beings and then the world.

No levels of high or low.

To me that suggests "better than" or "not as good as" kinds of judgment. In Buddhist teachings - that kind of thinking(judgment) is discouraged as it does not lead to increasing abilities of compassion.

For example: I would not think myself more compassionate than anyone here. Either I am - in any given situation - or I am not. Maybe my circles are larger than some in one respect - but smaller in other aspects of life.

If we are all standing still in a very calm shallow pool - there are no circular waves around us. But as any of us move - there will be waves radiating outward in all directions. The distance they go is based upon the effort or the strength of the movement - yes?
In a calm shallow pool - our movements easily make the waves radiate outward. But what if one is in a deep choppy pool?

The way I see myself - the strength of my movement in the shallow pool might not be enough to make even one little circle around me in the deep choppy one. So I practice compassion - to strengthen it - for when I find myself in the deep choppy pool.

I listened to this talk given by Tara Brach yesterday morning and thought of you. I also laughed at her stories too. She's very adept at describing the difficulties we are confronted with in our lives. She's also good at weaving small methods you can practice while listening to her - to help one develop and increase ability.

The Divine Abodes: Compassion http://www.dharmaseed.org/teacher/175/talk/14202/

On another note: It is taught - that when one finds themselves in a situation where they just cannot seem to bring forth the compassion within - then it's best to just feel compassion for the Self. To honor the struggle one is going through. To honor their intention of compassion - but cannot feel it at the moment. When one does this for themselves - it increases one's ability to have compassion for others.

This is true. I found myself just in that situation this morning and I finally gave up and just focused on me. I felt such peace. It became easier to think with clarity and accept me for who I am at the moment.

I think it's important for INxJs - and people struggling with depressive and sad thoughts - to practice it on themselves first. It brings strength and vitality and replenishes Joy in one's Heart.

 

[#@&5&49]

[MENTION=2578]Kgal[/MENTION],

I thought it was a strange statement also and was wondering about it myself, that's why I put it out there. I'm glad you respnded. Maybe it was said to back up a belief that only God is capable of true compassion and the rest of us can never reach that state. It was told to me a long time ago and as I was contemplating what compassion means to me I remembered it. When Odyne said she didn't understand it either, I was trying to clarify it, but since I don't know the exact content it was used in there's no telling what it meant.

Anyway, I like the idea of when one cannot find compassion for another to then offer that compassion to oneself. That's beautiful, cause that's where it all begins anyway. Makes perfect sense. As for the other statement, I think that will be something I can put in my trash bin :love:

Thank you