Awkward situations | INFJ Forum

Awkward situations

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by gloomy-optimist, Sep 15, 2008.

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  1. gloomy-optimist

    gloomy-optimist Used to live here

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    Does anyone ever find themselves unsure as to what to do with social interactions?
    It seems like every once and awhile, I'll find some people where I get mixed reactions from; they seem friendly and as if they like me, but my "intuitive" side kicks in and says that I'm being annoying or boring, or am just not on the right wavelength.
    Sometimes it seems almost difficult to be myself around people because of this :/

    So...anyone relate...?
     
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  2. sumone

    sumone down the rabbit hole

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    Yeah I can relate to that. I try not to let it bother me though and just go the pleasant but quiet route until it passes. I get those funny feelings when people are feeling one way but acting another. It's uncomfortable and it's tempting to want to blame myself for it somehow but I've learned that is not a good thing to do. It is definitely a different wavelength as you were saying.
     
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  3. Silently Honest

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    Very much so, this is one of the reason I'm so protective actually, the fear of rejection. It's almost as if the intuition scares some people.
     
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  4. Kwistalline

    Kwistalline Permanent Fixture

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    SH, that's a very interesting point. I never thought about that before. Though, in my experience, I'll say something intuitive, they won't get the rational behind it and my comments are disregarded and I'm ignored. My BFF is the only person whose come back and been like "you were totally right" or "I'm starting to see why you said that, though it seemed really off at the time".
     
  5. Inkling

    Inkling Community Member

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    *gasp*
    what do you mean she's the only one???
     
  6. Shaz

    Shaz Community Member

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    Big problem here. I can't be completely natural with people I don't know yet - my intuition picks up signs of what they are as people and often find myself acting the way they seem to be the most comfortable with/the more appreciative of (to a certain extent), and end up filtering what I say, my body language, etc. Most of the time it's not even that counscious.

    Obviously then I tend to avoid the people that don't seem to be able to understand me, and I get more and more natural with time with the ones who accept me. But I need this feeling that they accept me as I am to allow myself to just not care about how I act. Sometimes I envy brash people.
     
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  7. greenapple

    greenapple Newbie

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    Ha thats funny. I met a girl my first week of college and I am pretty sure is an INFJ. She is very quiet and even when I tried to have a 1-1 conversation with her she was very subdued and seemed to be filtering... but then I will occasionally hear her say a hilariously dark remark at the most random moments (like something seeped past the filter) I dont think other people even notice these but I always laugh to myself
     
  8. Kwistalline

    Kwistalline Permanent Fixture

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    Ah! That was me!!

    Ok, prob not, but that's me all the time!

    Oh, inkling, um, well . . . you too . . . actually, yeah, you too. I suppose Dad does, now, especially since I've seen things he hasn't . . . And Bethany back in the day . . .
    let's just say "a small number".

    Sorry babe!
     
  9. OP
    gloomy-optimist

    gloomy-optimist Used to live here

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    Ha, yeah. :B I'm not quite that guarded, so it doesn't take as long, but I can relate. Especially with the dark part.
    For someone who's supposed to be compassionate, I threaten people a lot :B Jokingly, of course, but I shock myself occasionally.
    But, of course, those are only those are only with people I feel comfortable with. I have to feel like I won't be judged first.
     
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  10. Wyote

    Wyote Dad of the Ded
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    I pick up on that disjointed feeling from people really easily too. For the longest time I thought it was a Scorpio thing because I can figure out how a person really feels pretty quickly and then I use it to my advantage with various pyschological techniques -staring and arm gestures - but it weirds people out when I do it too much. It's like I try really hard to get on their wavelength but if they really don't want that then I make them uncomfortable.
     
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  11. OP
    gloomy-optimist

    gloomy-optimist Used to live here

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    I'm not gonna lie, that would probably creep me out a little too o_O
     
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  12. Wyote

    Wyote Dad of the Ded
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    haha, yea. Well it's not something I do on purpose most of the time. I just try to understand people and learn about them and once in a while I get carried away with it.

    Typically I leave people alone unless they approach me first.
     
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