I've stayed in the state of FL for a year and 2 months. Before then, I was living with my mom and I had no job. To make matters worse, I was not going to community college for the summer. I was not in school or had a job for the whole summer and it sucked! I felt I needed a change of pace because my mom was more of a friend then a parent. I want to learn responsibility, so I can move up in my life. That's why I chose to go to FL, even though I have to pay a small price to live a little.
I live with my older sister in her house, and I pay her rent every month. I work 2 part time jobs now. Life feels more busy, but I'm learning the responsibility that I need in life. My sister seems like a better guide than my mom. She told me she would let me know when I've overstayed my welcome. I know she still wants me around a little longer, because I can help her out. She struggles paying her bills on time, so it helps when I pay my share for living there. But, I'm starting to dislike my situation...
My sister went through her share of problems, and she ended up with 2 daughters to take care of on her own. She left her boyfriend because he was no good. Her current boyfriend seems more supportive to her, but it's an odd situation. His house foreclosed and now he lives under the same roof. But all is well because he pays his share too. It was odd to encounter him in the morning when I go to the kitchen to have a bowl of cereal at first. I felt reluctant to say hi to him whenever I casually encounter him. I find it easier to say hello to people that have a friendly attitude, but he just looks up without smiling and says, "what's up?" real quick.
I could hear him speaking to my sister one time and saying, "He never says hi, or ask how I'm doing. It's just plain rude!" He was taking offense because I felt odd about the situation? Then I overhear another talk, "What is he, a social retard?" And I could have sworn he was talking about me, but I wasn't sure... Sense I've been getting out more, it has helped me to lighten' up a little. The next time I see him, I put on a smile and, "Hey!" I guess it's not his personality to smile back and show enthusiasm. So, it still felt awkward being around him. He would tease by suddenly not saying, "what's up?" and smile at me and say, "hey peter" then once I made eye contact, he would look away and drop the smile.
I try to stay positive, and I hope that I'm just misunderstanding something. One day I hear him talking to his friend. I never see any of his friends visit at the house. This must be something important, I think. He's just talking to him in the living room as I'm in the kitchen to get some cereal. I go to my room with the cereal, so it seems less odd that I can hear him talk about his problems. I just make out a little of what he is saying, but the details don't matter. He's saying how he feels tied down living with my sister. He feels like his youth is behind him now, and then he starts talking about our family. He is saying something messed up about everyone, just going down the list of everyone in our family.
I'm thinking to myself, "Okay, every family has their share of problems, so why tell your friend ours? This just sounds like gossip! Telling him how fucked up we all are?" I'm so angry at this point! I don't like this person, but I try to carry on and be respectful anyway. I don't bother to tell my sister anything, because she just thinks he's so well put together in his life. She also says she wouldn't know what to do without him. All I want is out of this house, and away from this fucked up situation. My sister is heading for a fall, because she relies too heavily on him. She said he thought about marrying her. This can go one or two ways it seems like- He leaves her and my sister is in shambles, or they marry and he does it to settle down. I'm not saying they aren't in love, but their heads are in different places.
I don't know what to do because I just want to live my life, and I don't want to feel like I'm stuck in all this drama. I want peace, but I know so little about what steps to take to be on my own two feet. I wish I had my life together.
I live with my older sister in her house, and I pay her rent every month. I work 2 part time jobs now. Life feels more busy, but I'm learning the responsibility that I need in life. My sister seems like a better guide than my mom. She told me she would let me know when I've overstayed my welcome. I know she still wants me around a little longer, because I can help her out. She struggles paying her bills on time, so it helps when I pay my share for living there. But, I'm starting to dislike my situation...
My sister went through her share of problems, and she ended up with 2 daughters to take care of on her own. She left her boyfriend because he was no good. Her current boyfriend seems more supportive to her, but it's an odd situation. His house foreclosed and now he lives under the same roof. But all is well because he pays his share too. It was odd to encounter him in the morning when I go to the kitchen to have a bowl of cereal at first. I felt reluctant to say hi to him whenever I casually encounter him. I find it easier to say hello to people that have a friendly attitude, but he just looks up without smiling and says, "what's up?" real quick.
I could hear him speaking to my sister one time and saying, "He never says hi, or ask how I'm doing. It's just plain rude!" He was taking offense because I felt odd about the situation? Then I overhear another talk, "What is he, a social retard?" And I could have sworn he was talking about me, but I wasn't sure... Sense I've been getting out more, it has helped me to lighten' up a little. The next time I see him, I put on a smile and, "Hey!" I guess it's not his personality to smile back and show enthusiasm. So, it still felt awkward being around him. He would tease by suddenly not saying, "what's up?" and smile at me and say, "hey peter" then once I made eye contact, he would look away and drop the smile.
I try to stay positive, and I hope that I'm just misunderstanding something. One day I hear him talking to his friend. I never see any of his friends visit at the house. This must be something important, I think. He's just talking to him in the living room as I'm in the kitchen to get some cereal. I go to my room with the cereal, so it seems less odd that I can hear him talk about his problems. I just make out a little of what he is saying, but the details don't matter. He's saying how he feels tied down living with my sister. He feels like his youth is behind him now, and then he starts talking about our family. He is saying something messed up about everyone, just going down the list of everyone in our family.
I'm thinking to myself, "Okay, every family has their share of problems, so why tell your friend ours? This just sounds like gossip! Telling him how fucked up we all are?" I'm so angry at this point! I don't like this person, but I try to carry on and be respectful anyway. I don't bother to tell my sister anything, because she just thinks he's so well put together in his life. She also says she wouldn't know what to do without him. All I want is out of this house, and away from this fucked up situation. My sister is heading for a fall, because she relies too heavily on him. She said he thought about marrying her. This can go one or two ways it seems like- He leaves her and my sister is in shambles, or they marry and he does it to settle down. I'm not saying they aren't in love, but their heads are in different places.
I don't know what to do because I just want to live my life, and I don't want to feel like I'm stuck in all this drama. I want peace, but I know so little about what steps to take to be on my own two feet. I wish I had my life together.
