Tips for online dating . . .

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dating sites, reading profiles, judging online personalities, cautions, etc.
 
To be fair, I have never actually set out to date someone online. I've never joined a dating site or anything like it. I've just ended up in 3 online long distance relationships. However I will say this.

Make sure they are who they say they are. don't judge them on their profile or whatever and get involved with them. try and add them to msn, skype, aim or whatever else you have at your disposal and voicechat/camchat with them when you feel comfortable enough to do so.

If you're generally not a good judge of character the I wouldn't get into an online relationship, ecause if you want to be serious, at some point that online relationship will become an offline one and you will meet this person, and if you're the sort of person who gets messed around by friends who you thought were better people than they are, then you can't be sure what you're walking into.

meet in an open public place with lots of other people around. if you're not comfortable, don't agree to stay at their house and book a hotel.
 
Galileo said:
To be fair, I have never actually set out to date someone online. I've never joined a dating site or anything like it. I've just ended up in 3 online long distance relationships. However I will say this.

Make sure they are who they say they are. don't judge them on their profile or whatever and get involved with them. try and add them to msn, skype, aim or whatever else you have at your disposal and voicechat/camchat with them when you feel comfortable enough to do so.

If you're generally not a good judge of character the I wouldn't get into an online relationship, ecause if you want to be serious, at some point that online relationship will become an offline one and you will meet this person, and if you're the sort of person who gets messed around by friends who you thought were better people than they are, then you can't be sure what you're walking into.
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Thank you. Thing is, online dating is really the only other option for dating I have since I don't go out often and meeting people today is much more difficult. When I do go out with acquaintances, etc. I don't connect with anyone. I know dating online is tricky, which is why I'm asking for tips :D. I don't like the idea of posting my pic online on a dating site but it seems you don't receive responses if you don't. And I am not really interested in an "online relationship". I don't mind meeting and getting to know someone online but if I'm going to have a relationship, it's going to be in person. I agree that it's difficult to judge from the profile because those can clearly be fake or made up, etc.
 
Probably a good idea to never be alone with them, for like... a couple of years lol.
 
I'm looking for something beyond the usual advice of "don't follow the ginger bread cookies to the ginger bread house, because you will be eaten."
 
Res said:
I'm looking for something beyond the usual advice of "don't follow the ginger bread cookies to the ginger bread house, because you will be eaten."
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That was going to be my next tip =\
 
Wyote said:
Probably a good idea to never be alone with them, for like... a couple of years lol.
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I think this is only if you have like, limited trust within your partner xD

Sure, you don't know what they are going to be like IRL, but if you trust them and told the truth the entire time, I don't see the problem.

I've been in an online relationship for 3 years and I met him in person last summer. We were fine, really fine in fact. There was no tension or awkwardness at all. I trusted him, and visa versa. So there was no problem there xD

Obviously, Im not saying you shouldnt have your wits about you, and that you shouldnt prepare for someone completely different. But just have a little bit of faith ^_^
 
ank you. Thing is, online dating is really the only other option for dating I have since I don't go out often and meeting people today is much more difficult. When I do go out with acquaintances, etc. I don't connect with anyone. I know dating online is tricky, which is why I'm asking for tips . I don't like the idea of posting my pic online on a dating site but it seems you don't receive responses if you don't. And I am not really interested in an "online relationship". I don't mind meeting and getting to know someone online but if I'm going to have a relationship, it's going to be in person. I agree that it's difficult to judge from the profile because those can clearly be fake or made up, etc.
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I have also got a lot of friends I met online that I met through other friends on skype etc.

I've travelled and even stayed in their houses, but I am confident in my judgement of who they are to do that.

I don't think dating sites are the answer. I met the 3 people I was involved with on forums and one from an online game. I met my husband on skype just by searching for profiles. the trick is to look for friends and then become partners.
 
If you're a woman, you will definitely want cleavage shots with your lips pursed out like you just can't wait to take a big dick in your mouth.

If you're a man, you will definitely want to pose shirtless with sunglasses and a sideways ballcap while you flash gang signs with your fingers.
 
Galileo said:
I have also got a lot of friends I met online that I met through other friends on skype etc.

I've travelled and even stayed in their houses, but I am confident in my judgement of who they are to do that.

I don't think dating sites are the answer. I met the 3 people I was involved with on forums and one from an online game. I met my husband on skype just by searching for profiles. the trick is to look for friends and then become partners.
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Honestly, well, not all forums are like this. And yeah, it would be nice if it was a site such as this where you can get to know people in a more thorough way before dating, but i'm curious as where these places are? Well, dating sites may not be the answer, but I'm still interested in practical tips for dating online if it's the primary option.
 
Galileo is right. Better to go looking in more casual environments.
 
thread reopened by request :)


Note: You can post whatever you want about dating online here. No longer a personal advice thread.
 
Online dating... Hmm. Well I think some people are built for it and some people aren't.

For myself, personally I tend to connect with people who are at a distance better than I connect with people face to face. It seems somehow safer that way, but that's just me.

Since I have been through one of those Online Dating Horror Stories my advise is to see people on webcam ALWAYS before making any big moves or meeting up. I didn't do this and I got screwed like you wouldn't believe.

If you are going to date someone online I think that moving communication off the computer is a good idea and there should be a lot of phone calls, and if you can't afford that then skype is a good idea. I just feel that it is extremely important to connect to something other than text and in some cases people are very different in voice or in person than they are online.

Patience is key and so is trust. If you don't have patience or trust then an online dating situation is probably not going to work for you. You never really know what someone is doing IRL when they aren't talking to you online. Some people will be completely faithful to an online connection and some people will not.

If I "date" someone online or feel like there is some kind of emotional commitment there I HAVE to meet them in person. Keeping things online is all fine and good but at some point I feel like you have to meet face to face and bring the relationship into reality. You don't want to connect with someone online and then dedicate large chunks of time to someone you haven't even been able to physically touch.

But that's just how I'd do it. I have all the patience in the world for online relationships so for someone like me it works well in it's inception. But eventually text just isn't enough.
 
Korg said:
If you're a woman, you will definitely want cleavage shots with your lips pursed out like you just can't wait to take a big dick in your mouth.

If you're a man, you will definitely want to pose shirtless with sunglasses and a sideways ballcap while you flash gang signs with your fingers.
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IF you want to find some quick hookup. (And if you're hot.)

*whistles*

I guess it depends on what you're looking for. I can't say about online dating there because I've only looked around personals here and...well. A lot of it was sex-based, and they weren't shy about exposing it.

I wish I have more tips to share, but per observation, avoid people who would say "don't judge the book by its cover" or all its variant; it's the people who seems to judge the most. :| Or alternatively, those who don't -want- to be judged, not those who don't mind.
 
Don't decieve people!

You should have at least a few full body shots of yourself on your online dating profile, but don't attract the wrong type of attention.

I also agree with those who said that it would be a wise idea to web cam before making any major moves, like actually trying to meet in person.
 
I like Sandra's advice.

I met my spouse 13 years ago now through a chat forum and it wasn't a dating one. My only advice to you is this: most people are who they say they are. Go into it with your eyes open though and if possible, get to know them through other channels if you sense some kind of connection. As soon as you can, make arrangements to meet. You don't want it to go on too long if things are looking serious. When you do meet, know that this is the person you have been talking to and have come to like. If the romantic connection remains then all is good but if not, then hopefully you will come out of it still being friends with that person.

Good luck.
 
I completely agree with Sandra.

also, if you're dating someone online, try to find time where you turn off all other programs etc and just talk to that person, like you would do on a date. Find time to have a nice long chat every couple of days or so, because when you're online it's sometimes harder to maintain that relationship, because the only way you can communicate is over a computer, so try to make time that is just for each other, don't chat with others during this time and and don't be posting on infjs hehe.


also, when/if you decide to stay with someone you met online, make sure you set ground rules, ie where you would like to be sleeping and so on, so noone is labouring under any misconceptions.
 
I question if it's even possible for people like me to online date. I need to get to know someone before I even feel much of an attraction to them and online dating seems set up to encourage contrived interactions and speedy dating. Not my thing.
 
slant said:
I question if it's even possible for people like me to online date. I need to get to know someone before I even feel much of an attraction to them and online dating seems set up to encourage contrived interactions and speedy dating. Not my thing.
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The forum's advertising shiz got me hitting on the bait (low point in life, sorry). I got curious so I set up a profile. It was also supposed to be about Christian dating so that, (discriminatory of me, again sorry) gave me a bit of comfort that maybe it wouldn't be a pimping site. I have seen prank videos of people on omegle and man are there predators.

Anyway, I set up a profile and now I'm convinced that it's a cash machine. If you really stream through the members, the photos are too perfect to be human! You also receive lots of messages, which is weird and doubtful so I don't reply. Many of the messages are seriously sweet like WTF if my self esteem was even lower, I'd be all over the credit card purchase to just reply. So instead of replying to everything, I try to evaluate with even more scrutiny. Perfect photos are creepy. Perfect messages, even more so.

Anyway, to compare and out of curiousity, I downloaded several more apps to see the differences in hype. There was WooPlus, Tinder --- yeah that's it. I've already tried Facebook Dating (and deleted my account there because creeps!). So the wooplus platform has basically no people in it and @MiiRxGe's recommendation, Tinder had waaaay too many people on it.

Of the three, Tinder was more crowded-- like a party. Then if you switch on your searches to everyone and not just man or woman, plus it's location based --- the risk of finding my students or people I know on Tinder gets higher and I don't like that. Not that I don't like the people I know... Eh idk, I just don't like it. It's like wanting to travel to another continent but ending up at the local market. Also mostly everyone is in bras and cleavage exposed photos. And also all the crazy stories I hear about Tinder from friends so anxiety build up led to account deletion after 30min of exploring the site. Basically same story for all dating accounts I made, except this christian date site is lasting because it isn't so harmful.

I don't know why I'm doing this apart from genuine curiuousity combined with a bad spell of loneliness and not wanting to do any work at all. I can't deny that I am considering being in a relationship even if the prospect of it scares me and I really do like the idea of love, so maybe I should just wait and see.

Online dating is simply just that. Whatever it is. It's just meeting people and broadening horizons and making sure you don't trust any of them. So basically, it's just life inside a tiny screen.
 
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