The dark side of INFJ | INFJ Forum

The dark side of INFJ

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phaedra

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Jan 2, 2015
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Long story short, I just moved to Scotland about a week ago to study abroad for a semester. A little background: I've been typed as an INFJ ever since I first took the test in 9th grade. I always type INFJ, except for a few times I've gotten INFP. Anyways, on the 3rd or 4th day here, I experienced something really strange. I got into this really depressive mood, even contemplating suicide. Obviously I would never commit suicide because there is always that smart part of me that says it would be stupid. But what is strange is that I got so depressed in the first place. Crying constantly, thinking scary thoughts, being withdrawn and sometimes snarky at people, not wanting to talk to anyone, thinking that I would never get out of my situation, not wanting to do any schoolwork, etc. I got really unloving- not thinking anyone loved me, not truly remembering how deep my love it for my loved ones... Why this is so strange is because I am usually a really cheerful person. I am always smiling, willing to talk to others (albeit if they're receptive to me talking to them), thinking positively, knowing I can succeed. And I snapped out of literally overnight. I started feeling a little better one night, then I woke up the next day back to my old self, my confident and happy self.

Why I created this thread is because I am wondering if any other INFJs have ever gone through the same thing. Do you have this scary other side of you that only emerges at certain times? Can this happen to everyone, or if anything, what kind of association does it have with INFJ-ness?
 
i'm sorry to hear that you've had a tough time recently. could it be that you came down with homesickness? i don't think that one mbti type is more "dark" than others, but i think that people think that they are, because introverts and intuitives tend to look more analytically on their own minds.

analyzing sad things over and over again can get dark. i often have to drag myself out of those places. it can get rough. and like annie clark said in a recent interview "like any red-blooded person, i've contemplated suicide".

maybe talk to a student councilor about your experience? have them recommend someone you can talk to if you don't think that you might be headed into a depression!
 
Your writing is characteristic of the INFP writing style. We would be your shadow. You've just had a moment as one of us. Consider yourself lucky. If Jesus was XXXX, you'd be one step closer.

Not sure how to test this except with your reaction to sponge bob references.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4DPFmqXF0Ns

Are you Squidward?
 
All the time. I think it's somewhat situational depression, because I know that I've had great times in my life, where I've never felt more alive.
My guess, is that it's the big changes to blame. I moved out of my parents, moved into a home with a mortgage with my fiance, and now work full time. All this new stress and change in atmosphere is sucking the vitality right out of me. I have no time or energy to be myself and do the things I know I love. I feel like a dull, watered down, compromised version of myself so I actually contemplate suicide all the time. My INTJ fiance always talks about how "illogical" my depression and feelings are which makes it worse.
Sorry if I got carried away, lol.
But my answer is, I think we just feel very vulnerable in the shadows of such big changes. I always tell myself though, this too shall pass. Everything passes, life goes on, and things do eventually get better. And this is true.
 
Hrrm. How do I help you? I don't know. I really want to help you but I don't know how. I'm sorry. :'/

Why do you people have to make me cry? If you don't believe me, I'll take a picture. Well shit, you can't tell. I still have the photo, but either way, please don't commit suicide. You do what I can't. That is special in its own way. At the very least, you personally, have taught me something. You've taught me I can cry. Thank you.

But yes. You are likely INFP. You'd likely find more like minded people here. https://www.google.de/search?q=INFP+forum
 
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Actually, it is likely that you are going through culture shock. It is not you and it is not specific to infj.
 
phaedra said:
Long story short, I just moved to Scotland about a week ago to study abroad for a semester. A little background: I've been typed as an INFJ ever since I first took the test in 9th grade. I always type INFJ, except for a few times I've gotten INFP. Anyways, on the 3rd or 4th day here, I experienced something really strange. I got into this really depressive mood, even contemplating suicide. Obviously I would never commit suicide because there is always that smart part of me that says it would be stupid. But what is strange is that I got so depressed in the first place. Crying constantly, thinking scary thoughts, being withdrawn and sometimes snarky at people, not wanting to talk to anyone, thinking that I would never get out of my situation, not wanting to do any schoolwork, etc. I got really unloving- not thinking anyone loved me, not truly remembering how deep my love it for my loved ones... Why this is so strange is because I am usually a really cheerful person. I am always smiling, willing to talk to others (albeit if they're receptive to me talking to them), thinking positively, knowing I can succeed. And I snapped out of literally overnight. I started feeling a little better one night, then I woke up the next day back to my old self, my confident and happy self.

Why I created this thread is because I am wondering if any other INFJs have ever gone through the same thing. Do you have this scary other side of you that only emerges at certain times? Can this happen to everyone, or if anything, what kind of association does it have with INFJ-ness?
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I have gone through this and I am an INTP as the test says anyways.

I think it was caused by suppression of certain issues that I believed to be incapable of affecting me. Likely the things still affected me although more through my subconscious which then bled into my consciousness when it could no longer handle the issue.

The problem went away after I finally accepted that I need to feel these things and so I just accepted the process adn then in the end I decided I had enough and went back to my normal life without hint of them again.
 
Hrrm. I've gone through a revision on my theory. My theory was this. INFPs use Te, so they would write longer. Much longer. From what I've seen, it is an easy tell. But now, I've realized that we all can use Te. So I'm wrong. In fact, 99% of my information on type is being rewritten at this very moment.
 
Alomoes said:
Hrrm. I've gone through a revision on my theory. My theory was this. INFPs use Te, so they would write longer. Much longer. From what I've seen, it is an easy tell. But now, I've realized that we all can use Te. So I'm wrong. In fact, 99% of my information on type is being rewritten at this very moment.
Click to expand...

I am glad you're learning.
 
Slowly learning what is and what isn't type related. And learning that people can change. I don't always have to work through the framework of their type to get a favorable answer.

Cognitive functions are not exclusively type related. Anybody can use them.
 
phaedra said:
Long story short, I just moved to Scotland about a week ago to study abroad for a semester. A little background: I've been typed as an INFJ ever since I first took the test in 9th grade. I always type INFJ, except for a few times I've gotten INFP. Anyways, on the 3rd or 4th day here, I experienced something really strange. I got into this really depressive mood, even contemplating suicide. Obviously I would never commit suicide because there is always that smart part of me that says it would be stupid. But what is strange is that I got so depressed in the first place. Crying constantly, thinking scary thoughts, being withdrawn and sometimes snarky at people, not wanting to talk to anyone, thinking that I would never get out of my situation, not wanting to do any schoolwork, etc. I got really unloving- not thinking anyone loved me, not truly remembering how deep my love it for my loved ones... Why this is so strange is because I am usually a really cheerful person. I am always smiling, willing to talk to others (albeit if they're receptive to me talking to them), thinking positively, knowing I can succeed. And I snapped out of literally overnight. I started feeling a little better one night, then I woke up the next day back to my old self, my confident and happy self.

Why I created this thread is because I am wondering if any other INFJs have ever gone through the same thing. Do you have this scary other side of you that only emerges at certain times? Can this happen to everyone, or if anything, what kind of association does it have with INFJ-ness?
Click to expand...
People suck! That's one! But you are better than that! Stay strong out there! Always get back to your inner power! Stay strong my friends !
 
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phaedra said:
Long story short, I just moved to Scotland about a week ago to study abroad for a semester. A little background: I've been typed as an INFJ ever since I first took the test in 9th grade. I always type INFJ, except for a few times I've gotten INFP. Anyways, on the 3rd or 4th day here, I experienced something really strange. I got into this really depressive mood, even contemplating suicide. Obviously I would never commit suicide because there is always that smart part of me that says it would be stupid. But what is strange is that I got so depressed in the first place. Crying constantly, thinking scary thoughts, being withdrawn and sometimes snarky at people, not wanting to talk to anyone, thinking that I would never get out of my situation, not wanting to do any schoolwork, etc. I got really unloving- not thinking anyone loved me, not truly remembering how deep my love it for my loved ones... Why this is so strange is because I am usually a really cheerful person. I am always smiling, willing to talk to others (albeit if they're receptive to me talking to them), thinking positively, knowing I can succeed. And I snapped out of literally overnight. I started feeling a little better one night, then I woke up the next day back to my old self, my confident and happy self.

Why I created this thread is because I am wondering if any other INFJs have ever gone through the same thing. Do you have this scary other side of you that only emerges at certain times? Can this happen to everyone, or if anything, what kind of association does it have with INFJ-ness?
Click to expand...

I am an INFJ and have gone through what you describe numerous times in my life, since childhood. I think it may be more related to depressive episodes than type, though INFJs probably experience depressive symptoms through their own framework. I can relate to the exact description you shared, ao please don't feel alone. I find it happens less often as I get older - perhaps maturity, increased self-awareness and self-management ability, decrease in hormonal activity? Whatever the case, please be diligent with self-care, attend to your mental health, and seek support from loved ones or mental health services as available. INFJ-specific or not, those steps should help you stay your usual self!
 
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