People not connecting with you

[technics]

In most of my encounters with Feelers, I usually sense this need from them to connect with me. But somehow I never feel the need to respond to this need, no urge to activate something within me or to open up to them, and so I end up not connecting with them. And when that happens, I see that they experience either frustration, annoyance or irritation, or anger. To a mild degree, of course, but still noticeable.

And it baffles me as how my simply being neutral could cause such a disturbance in them. Could you explain why this is and how that feels like?

 

[Radiantshadow]

Social connection and disclosure are environmental monitoring and organizational devices that transcend Jung's and Meyers' systems of personality. Whether it's a series of numbers, pieces of crime evidence, or strings of social behavior, having a set of data that you don't know what to do with, and that is deemed important, is mildly disconcerting. Having an incomplete picture of one's environment potentially poses threats, after all. Granted, by definition, having one of the Feeling functions high in one's cognitive stack may make these processes more subjectively meaningful and effective, but psychology and social neuroscience research has shown them to be universal phenomenon.

That said, neutrality doesn't bother me. I actually get slightly frustrated at people who demand I open up and connect to them when I have no inclination to do so. (I'm an INFJ, for what it matters.) The acceptance of diversity is an important skill, IMO. People are different: they can do the same things for different reasons and different things for the same reasons. Given healthy circumstances, if person A gets frustrated at person B because they don't want to open up, it's A's problem for feeling that B should, or must, act a certain way.

 

[Trifoilum]

Sometimes it may mean that they get self-anxious, like, "OMG am I doing something wrong? OMG am I offending them?"

And then when they found out that nope, it's just your character; things may get a bit too...personal? a.k.a they may get a bit disappointed, disillusioned even.