People leave INFJs | INFJ Forum

People leave INFJs

INFJok

INFJok

Community Member
Nov 27, 2012
258
61
587
MBTI
INFJ
Enneagram
6
"... You know you're an INFJ when little, to no people stay in your life for very long, because they don't understand you, your feelings, 'nor your intensity. "

Saw this in a forum and easily related to this.
Are we THAT complicated to even stick around for or are we just destined to be loners?
 
My close friends understand that I don't get out much. They understand that even if I'm not talking to them every minute of every day, it doesn't mean that I love them any less or that I'm mad at them...simply that is how I am.

Romantic attachments on the other hand, that is a different ball of agitation entirely. The loneliness of single life can get depressing, but it pushes me to strive to better myself in other ways at least. Always try to turn the bad into something positive.
 
IME, when someone claims nobody sticks around because they don't get the intensity / emotionalism / hard to understand nature / depth / etc

...it usually just means they're a self-absorbed, annoying mother fucker with poor social skills.
 
Korg said:
IME, when someone claims nobody sticks around because they don't get the intensity / emotionalism / hard to understand nature / depth / etc

...it usually just means they're a self-absorbed, annoying mother fucker with poor social skills.
Click to expand...

What about the rest of the time? Uncle fuckers?
 
INFJok said:
"... You know you're an INFJ when little, to no people stay in your life for very long, because they don't understand you, your feelings, 'nor your intensity. "

Saw this in a forum and easily related to this.
Are we THAT complicated to even stick around for or are we just destined to be loners?
Click to expand...

I happen to push my people away, usually, and not vice versa.

But it is for those reasons.
 
subwayrider said:
I happen to push my people away, usually, and not vice versa.

But it is for those reasons.
Click to expand...

pretty much so in my case too. I just pushed a whole lotta people away. they wernt exactly happy about it needless to say esp when I gave no reason but when i'm with them I get drained crazy just to maintain my masks
 
So I guess we're meant to be lonely, eh?
 
INFJok said:
So I guess we're meant to be lonely, eh?
Click to expand...

Not necessarily. But thinking that your problems or issues are an unalterable aspect of your concrete personality is one way to ensure that you are.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Jill Hives
Grey Wolf said:
pretty much so in my case too. I just pushed a whole lotta people away. they wernt exactly happy about it needless to say esp when I gave no reason but when i'm with them I get drained crazy just to maintain my masks
Click to expand...

Word.
 
Cornerstone said:
Not necessarily. But thinking that your problems or issues are an unalterable aspect of your concrete personality is one way to ensure that you are.
Click to expand...

IMO, we just have to find the right people to share ourselves with.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Azazel
Oh good, a pity party.
 
  • Like
Reactions: SealHammer
INFJok said:
So I guess we're meant to be lonely, eh?
Click to expand...

Fuck that noise. You can sit and have a pity party - I'm not going to let someone's inability to understand me stop me from being a happy, sociable person. Maybe we're meant to be misunderstood, but so long as you surround yourself with people who at least strive to better understand you despite the difficulties, you can make the struggle for understanding a worthwhile endeavor - much like how Albert Camus imagines Sisyphus and his boulder. You cannot be lonely unless you have consciously accepted that you are going to be that way.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Grey Wolf
thein answer is simple, board games
 
Just because it's hard doesn't mean it's impossible, unhealthy, or that it shouldn't be done.

It can be done, it is very possible, and I think if one wants it to happen, one should endeavor towards it.
 
"... You know you're an INFJ when little, to no people stay in your life for very long, because they don't understand you, your feelings, 'nor your intensity. "
Click to expand...
Usually we stick to each other for a very long time or not at all. It's very black and white for me when it comes to it. Sometimes I don't want to stick to certain people :tape: That being said, I have very few friends and most of them are long-term. I hardly trust anyone because I love being myself instead of that half-ass version I usually show in public. Maybe that's why I hardly make any new friendships. Picky, to be honest.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Cornerstone
Ada said:
Usually we stick to each other for a very long time or not at all. It's very black and white for me when it comes to it. Sometimes I don't want to stick to certain people :tape: That being said, I have very few friends and most of them are long-term. I hardly trust anyone because I love being myself instead of that half-ass version I usually show in public. Maybe that's why I hardly make any new friendships. Picky, to be honest.
Click to expand...

ahh I love the half ass version. whole world thinks we're Es and think we're oh so shallow (not that I think Es are shallow. I mean it like that half-ass version makes us look shallow. well, in my case anyway :D)
 
  • Like
Reactions: rawr
INFJok said:
"... You know you're an INFJ when little, to no people stay in your life for very long, because they don't understand you, your feelings, 'nor your intensity. "

Saw this in a forum and easily related to this.
Are we THAT complicated to even stick around for or are we just destined to be loners?
Click to expand...

I get the vibe that someone in your life is treating you badly. Why do you keep having these self defeating thoughts?

You are not destined to be lonely. If anything, INFJ's are better at forming long term relationships than average. Maybe you just need to let go.
 
I thought the same thing about myself for a while and I am an INFP. I've since come to the conclusion that [MENTION=1425]Korg[/MENTION] basically has the right idea. When someone plays the victim and is oozing a kind of "woe is me" stench about them, they rarely keep friends for long, or have trouble developing meaningful relationships. Not saying you are this way, I have no idea about that. But it took me realizing this to get myself out of that train of thought. It becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. Positive thinking should be directed towards yourself first so you can then channel it to other people. Feels good man.
 
chulo said:
I get the vibe that someone in your life is treating you badly. Why do you keep having these self defeating thoughts?

You are not destined to be lonely. If anything, INFJ's are better at forming long term relationships than average. Maybe you just need to let go.
Click to expand...

How do you know that?
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom
Back