Our marriage is on the rocks... | INFJ Forum

Our marriage is on the rocks...

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by spudscoffee, Nov 27, 2017.

Share This Page

Watchers:
This thread is being watched by 5 users.
More threads by spudscoffee
  1. spudscoffee

    spudscoffee Community Member

    Joined:
    Apr 29, 2014
    Threads:
    20
    Messages:
    153
    Featured Threads:
    4
    Likes Received:
    333
    Trophy Points:
    617
    MBTI:
    do not know
    Hi All,

    My husband and I have been having some squabbles lately that I think it is time for us to see a marriage therapist. He doesn't believe in this and stated and he won't go even if I decide to leave him. I really wanted to save our marriage and help ourselves. Is this a sign that he has already given up on us? How should I convince him to go with me to marriage counseling?


     
  2. James

    James Infamy, infamy.. they've all got it infamy
    Retired Staff

    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2009
    Threads:
    121
    Messages:
    5,560
    Featured Threads:
    8
    Likes Received:
    21,594
    Trophy Points:
    3,498
    Gender:
    Male
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    I think if you try this link it might help you.

    http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp

    I think if you give some more details on what the arguments are, and why you think they happen members might be able to contribute. I hope you're ok.
     
    Ren, Happy Phantom and MrSquared like this.
  3. macerunny

    macerunny Newbie

    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2017
    Threads:
    0
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    11
    Trophy Points:
    11
    MBTI:
    defender
    first of all, I'm very sorry about that. what kind of arguments are you having, is it something serious? If you want to save your marriage, one thing I can advice is to rekindle it. do you still have date nights?
     
    Icedream, Ren and James like this.
  4. Lady Jolanda

    Lady Jolanda Controversial Girlfriend
    Staff Member Tech Admin

    Joined:
    Nov 15, 2017
    Threads:
    63
    Messages:
    4,739
    Featured Threads:
    3
    Likes Received:
    72,297
    Trophy Points:
    2,922
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Netherlands
    MBTI:
    xNTP
    Enneagram:
    6-4-9
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    Ren and James like this.
  5. Rin

    Rin Regular Poster

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2017
    Threads:
    8
    Messages:
    66
    Featured Threads:
    2
    Likes Received:
    115
    Trophy Points:
    812
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Enneagram:
    Type 1
    I'm sorry to hear that. I hope things get better.

    It'd be helpful if you can figure out the MBTI types of both of you. It has helped me and I believe it'd help you. The types makes us understand how different people communicate and see the world, so that'd help to bridge the communication style and hopefully solve the issues.

    Personally, I don't believe in counselors as well. Most of them don't sincerely care to help us. Also, they're lacking the information and context to actually give us the solution.
     
    Icedream and Ren like this.
  6. OP
    spudscoffee

    spudscoffee Community Member

    Joined:
    Apr 29, 2014
    Threads:
    20
    Messages:
    153
    Featured Threads:
    4
    Likes Received:
    333
    Trophy Points:
    617
    MBTI:
    do not know
    He's been very busy lately with work and I observed that he has been drinking a lot. Sometimes he comes home drunk and we get into a fight. I don't know if he has other problems because he is not telling me anything. I keep on asking him what's wrong with him, but he just blocks me off. I don't know what to do. Does anybody know about restoration counseling? I recently read it at this site and it's very promising.
     
  7. macerunny

    macerunny Newbie

    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2017
    Threads:
    0
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    11
    Trophy Points:
    11
    MBTI:
    defender
    It's a sort of marriage counseling. There's no harm in trying but it would be better if both of you will undergo a counseling. I hope that you'll still be able to save your marriage.
     
  8. Icedream

    Icedream Blue Butterfly

    Joined:
    Apr 14, 2017
    Threads:
    85
    Messages:
    5,432
    Featured Threads:
    28
    Likes Received:
    16,667
    Trophy Points:
    2,884
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Well this is tricky, now isn't it?

    Instead of asking him what's wrong, what I would do is ask "Is this the problem?" Eventually, you'll hit a sensitive spot, and you'll be able to help him.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
Loading...

Share This Page