Knowing vs. Showing? | INFJ Forum

Knowing vs. Showing?

Gaze

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Sep 5, 2009
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We are a very visible culture. We think something doesn't exist unless we can see or perceive it with our own eyes. Irl or online, it's very common for people (including myself) to think someone doesn't know or understand something if they can't show it in their behavior, conduct, or attitude. In other words, we judge others as clueless or less knowledgeable because they don't demonstrate or show us visibly that they know whatever it is we think or expect them to know.

Just an observation.
 
Sometimes I turn it around on myself.

I reflect on myself, and since sometimes I don't show that I know something or what I show is so unorthodox, others assume I don't know it, and I start to lose confidence in my own abilities, and eventually I have convinced myself I don't know something.
 
Both cases had happened to me. I got so fixed with other people not seemingly to show they know about things, then I realized that I don't either, and I got pissed and depressed. A deadly circle.

Sometimes, certain knowledge actually have to be shown, or supposed to be shown instead of 'kept hidden'. It's the only way others can know what they're knowing. Like say, etiquette. Or morality. In such cases, not showing is also showing.

I guess there's an element of mistrust, against obfuscation, against secrecy.
 
Sometimes I turn it around on myself.

I reflect on myself, and since sometimes I don't show that I know something or what I show is so unorthodox, others assume I don't know it, and I start to lose confidence in my own abilities, and eventually I have convinced myself I don't know something.

Yep, can definitely relate to this.

Both cases had happened to me. I got so fixed with other people not seemingly to show they know about things, then I realized that I don't either, and I got pissed and depressed. A deadly circle.

Sometimes, certain knowledge actually have to be shown, or supposed to be shown instead of 'kept hidden'. It's the only way others can know what they're knowing. Like say, etiquette. Or morality. In such cases, not showing is also showing.

I guess there's an element of mistrust, against obfuscation, against secrecy.

Agree.
 
In relationships, I've noticed that not much is left to faith. Trust becomes meaningless when you can only trust a person by knowing that they are/aren't doing something. Not that you trust that they are.

Not been in many relationships, but I have seen this in others. Of course, they need to prove to me in prior circumstance and in behavior that I can trust them in the future, but less showing is needed to achieve knowing as time goes on. I feel this is ideal.