INFJs and Perfectionism

[heiots]

I've been struggling with a particular musical craft for a long time now, in my own practice sessions and lessons. The thing is, I know I have the skill and ability, also affirmed by the teacher, but I often overthink and in trying to compensate for a mistake - that is, in trying to correct it - I tend to go to the other extreme. And it has been this constant swinging back and forth, and once in a while, getting that hit of being in the right spot - making the right sounds and actually feeling good while performing.

Is there anyone else who struggles with this? Because I once read this article about how in the long term performing arts isn't good for the INFJ, and that has created some...well, not doubt, but curiosity about why that's so, because it has taken an emotional toll on me to have to struggle so hard now to get what I used to just have fun at.

 

[Ginny]

Sounds like Ne insecurity to me, perhaps coupled with an Ni-Ti loop. It makes me think of Host Eric from Talking with Famous People. He is an ENTP, so an Ne-dom, and writes his own songs. The thing about INFJs vs ENTPs in music is that INFJs want to finish something, but improv is more of an Ne-thing. And I guess you'd need the creative output of Ne to see the different options and later choose one. Inconsequence, your perfectionism comes from Se-Ni, but in your tertiary function Ti you see the different possible outcomes from what you perceived with Se-Ni.

So I see two different options: either you are insecure because you try to do it with Ni and Ti, which then puts you in a perfectionistic vicious cycle; or you try to focus on one with Ni, then see the different opions with Ti, which is when Ne (as your first Shadow function) makes you doubt your choice. Again, I guess the reason is that INFJs try to mimic Ne by using Ni and Ti to choose a tune (or riff) and then use Se to put it out into the world, something Ne-doms (or I suppose also auxiliaries) would do natually with one cognitive function. In addition, perceivers are probably less worried about finishing it and having a perfect outcome, especially ENTPs, because they kind of "go with the flow." And in music it makes them stick with what they produced in the moment.


For the INFJ, you have to move away from improvisation, because you need to have a goal to aim for. Therefore you need a strategy to keep you on track.

• Have you thought of making different versions? When you reach a point of divergence and leave it to pursue the other option? Then, if you should bounce back to the first, you continue there. You know what I mean?

• Another option would be to choose a mood (key), and sticking to the musical scale, which leaves you with less diverse options. If you write the song with a specific feeling or event in mind, it might limit the optional notes that fit at a specific point during the song.