Career changing? | INFJ Forum

Career changing?

Klawin T

Newbie
Oct 31, 2019
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Hi, I'm turning 30 and I'm having a major crisis.
I've been working a normal 9-5 corporate job for few years now and i don't feel any personal growth / no promotion / repetitive boring tasks everyday etc. up to a point where i feel depressed and have no motivation to live my life. I just don't see myself belonging here...

I did consider about going back to school as i think it's the only way out but the problem is i can't really decide which major to take on. Kind of did some research on my own...

Health Science, Healthcare ( occupational therapist?, physician assistant? )
Nursing
Biology ( field is kind of broad )
Computer Science ( feels kind of boring to me )

Anyone who's able to share some experience or shed some light...
I would really appreciate anyone who's willing to give some advice.
 
Hi, I'm turning 30 and I'm having a major crisis.
I've been working a normal 9-5 corporate job for few years now and i don't feel any personal growth / no promotion / repetitive boring tasks everyday etc. up to a point where i feel depressed and have no motivation to live my life. I just don't see myself belonging here...

I did consider about going back to school as i think it's the only way out but the problem is i can't really decide which major to take on. Kind of did some research on my own...

Health Science, Healthcare ( occupational therapist?, physician assistant? )
Nursing
Biology ( field is kind of broad )
Computer Science ( feels kind of boring to me )

Anyone who's able to share some experience or shed some light...
I would really appreciate anyone who's willing to give some advice.
Hi @Klawin T, welcome to the forum :)

I'm your age, and I was a teacher for three or so years before I started my PhD last year. While I enjoyed teaching generally, I wasn't intellectually fulfilled and couldn't see myself doing it for the rest of my life.

Taking the jump to go back to school has been something I haven't regretted so far, though having much less financial means is something a little irritating, as is the drop in felt status. I belonged to a school community with great colleagues and friends with mutual respect all 'round; known and liked by the kids, &c. I miss that, but again wouldn't change anything.

The only thing on my mind now is the unknown of how to build a career after the PhD but mostly, if I'm honest, of the tricky matter of finding a partner so late in life (I broke up with my ex earlier this year).

I guess it's scary, but if you don't make more certain moves toward the things you actually want in life, then you'll forever dwell in regret. I'd rather fail pursuing what I really want than not try at all.
 
I have been in corporate 9-6 job only for 2 months and I already miss the relative freedom and intellectual stimulation of university life. I will probably work here for a year and then go back pursuing my masters. Perhaps after that I can get something more intellectually challenging.

I realized that time is more valuable resource than money. I earn a decent salary for my country standards, but I would be willing to trade that for more flexible hours and intellectual stimulation.

I also did the following mental exercise: would my life really change that much If I got 10 times the current salary? The answer is no. I would still watch football, read, be on this forum, be with my girlfriend and friends, play board games. Nothing would change in terms of my interests. And this is a nice realization, because it means I already have what I want/need to be happy. The best thing in life really are free.

People want to be rich because they want to buy time.

So yes, I also think it's worth it to go back to school.
 
Hi, I'm turning 30 and I'm having a major crisis.
I've been working a normal 9-5 corporate job for few years now and i don't feel any personal growth / no promotion / repetitive boring tasks everyday etc. up to a point where i feel depressed and have no motivation to live my life. I just don't see myself belonging here...

I did consider about going back to school as i think it's the only way out but the problem is i can't really decide which major to take on. Kind of did some research on my own...

Health Science, Healthcare ( occupational therapist?, physician assistant? )
Nursing
Biology ( field is kind of broad )
Computer Science ( feels kind of boring to me )

Anyone who's able to share some experience or shed some light...
I would really appreciate anyone who's willing to give some advice.

I initiated a start up with some friends when I was 22 yrs old and shortly joined the academe after a year under the guise of being able to practice and teach at the same time. I was spreading myself too thinly and the academe began to demand much of my time. In the end, I liquidated that start up and left my job in the academe after failing to get a scholarship at NUS. Graduate school at NUS is expensive so it had to be a scholarship or nothing. After that, I joined corporate and was technical supervisor in a construction firm for a couple of years. It was fun. I get to solve problems. Corporate problems feel much more minute and less cut throat than the academe. I mean every mistake translated to profit loss and I couldn't exactly let my guilt foster too much in that. It was different in the academe where my mistake has longer repercussions. Failing a student often means changing their lives more than just say, arguing with a sub contractor.

In the end I returned to the academe because I needed the meaning that it gave me. Corporate was fun and light and I can still do it if I wanted to but somehow something about teaching makes my heart beat despite it being very exhausting. teaching -especially teaching impoverished kids adds meaning to my life.

I went back to the academe and pursued graduate studies part time so I could afford both a job and my masters. It is seriously tiring so you have to really want it. My masters which is supposed to just be a three year thing has now stretched to a four year thing, because I went awol for a time. It can get difficult to say the least.

My advice is to take your time. Don't be impatient with yourself. Go where you gravitate and don't try to control it too much. You'll see, one day you'd be on a path that stirs you.

I'm 33 now. Not much older than you so yeah.
What's your mbti again?
 
Some points to add:

1. Go where you find peace. You don't have to be on a path that adds impact to the world, you just have to be on a path that makes you look forward to a new day. It counts on the bad days.

I was honestly okay with the corporate structure. I was neither unhappy nor happy. I even enjoyed the peace. I had personal problems but those were my own and the corporate was this briefcase that opens and shuts when necessary. It was strangely relieving. It didn't depress me but if you feel you would do better with impact, go for it.


2. Don't be afraid to start from the bottom again. Changing careers often feels like starting from the first point and can honestly feel like a waste of time. It's not.

3. Don't give a fuck about status quo. Those things are volatile and surreal.

4. Feed yourself. Don't go for a job that cannot sustain your basic needs. It will eventually eat your soul. If you can, go for the in between - one that can feed you enough and help you pursue what you want. Luxury can be done without. (Refer to no. 3)

5. Sleep. Rest is paramount. Refer to no. 4. Whether it's a passion job or a daily grind sort of thing, always make time for hobbies that are truly leisurely to you. Start an urban garden or go walking or travel even if it drains you nuts. Live.

6. Consider retirement. You're probably going to live long enough. Consider your future pension a basic need.

7. There's no 7, for now.
 
Hi @Klawin T, welcome to the forum :)

I'm your age, and I was a teacher for three or so years before I started my PhD last year. While I enjoyed teaching generally, I wasn't intellectually fulfilled and couldn't see myself doing it for the rest of my life.

Taking the jump to go back to school has been something I haven't regretted so far, though having much less financial means is something a little irritating, as is the drop in felt status. I belonged to a school community with great colleagues and friends with mutual respect all 'round; known and liked by the kids, &c. I miss that, but again wouldn't change anything.

The only thing on my mind now is the unknown of how to build a career after the PhD but mostly, if I'm honest, of the tricky matter of finding a partner so late in life (I broke up with my ex earlier this year).

I guess it's scary, but if you don't make more certain moves toward the things you actually want in life, then you'll forever dwell in regret. I'd rather fail pursuing what I really want than not try at all.
Hi @Klawin T, welcome to the forum :)

I'm your age, and I was a teacher for three or so years before I started my PhD last year. While I enjoyed teaching generally, I wasn't intellectually fulfilled and couldn't see myself doing it for the rest of my life.

Taking the jump to go back to school has been something I haven't regretted so far, though having much less financial means is something a little irritating, as is the drop in felt status. I belonged to a school community with great colleagues and friends with mutual respect all 'round; known and liked by the kids, &c. I miss that, but again wouldn't change anything.

The only thing on my mind now is the unknown of how to build a career after the PhD but mostly, if I'm honest, of the tricky matter of finding a partner so late in life (I broke up with my ex earlier this year).

I guess it's scary, but if you don't make more certain moves toward the things you actually want in life, then you'll forever dwell in regret. I'd rather fail pursuing what I really want than not try at all.
Thanks for sharing your story with me, I will definitely look at options to take the jump & I feel sorry that you broke up earlier.
I'm sure the right person will come knocking on your door...
 
I have been in corporate 9-6 job only for 2 months and I already miss the relative freedom and intellectual stimulation of university life. I will probably work here for a year and then go back pursuing my masters. Perhaps after that I can get something more intellectually challenging.

I realized that time is more valuable resource than money. I earn a decent salary for my country standards, but I would be willing to trade that for more flexible hours and intellectual stimulation.

I also did the following mental exercise: would my life really change that much If I got 10 times the current salary? The answer is no. I would still watch football, read, be on this forum, be with my girlfriend and friends, play board games. Nothing would change in terms of my interests. And this is a nice realization, because it means I already have what I want/need to be happy. The best thing in life really are free.

People want to be rich because they want to buy time.

So yes, I also think it's worth it to go back to school.
Yes, can't agree more with you. Time really is valuable and i feel like I'm at the age where i can't risk wasting anymore time.
Thanks for your advice too... & Good luck with your masters next year!
 
I initiated a start up with some friends when I was 22 yrs old and shortly joined the academe after a year under the guise of being able to practice and teach at the same time. I was spreading myself too thinly and the academe began to demand much of my time. In the end, I liquidated that start up and left my job in the academe after failing to get a scholarship at NUS. Graduate school at NUS is expensive so it had to be a scholarship or nothing. After that, I joined corporate and was technical supervisor in a construction firm for a couple of years. It was fun. I get to solve problems. Corporate problems feel much more minute and less cut throat than the academe. I mean every mistake translated to profit loss and I couldn't exactly let my guilt foster too much in that. It was different in the academe where my mistake has longer repercussions. Failing a student often means changing their lives more than just say, arguing with a sub contractor.

In the end I returned to the academe because I needed the meaning that it gave me. Corporate was fun and light and I can still do it if I wanted to but somehow something about teaching makes my heart beat despite it being very exhausting. teaching -especially teaching impoverished kids adds meaning to my life.

I went back to the academe and pursued graduate studies part time so I could afford both a job and my masters. It is seriously tiring so you have to really want it. My masters which is supposed to just be a three year thing has now stretched to a four year thing, because I went awol for a time. It can get difficult to say the least.

My advice is to take your time. Don't be impatient with yourself. Go where you gravitate and don't try to control it too much. You'll see, one day you'd be on a path that stirs you.

I'm 33 now. Not much older than you so yeah.
What's your mbti again?
I'm an INFJ.
Thanks for sharing your story and taking your time to write. Your advice meant much to me, i will take time to consider.
I was too at a construction company only that I'm dealing with cold hard computers daily which doesn't seem meaningful to me as it's mostly routine job.
Every minute i spent at the company, i feel like I'm wasting my life, i wasn't feeling fulfilled.
That is when I'm really thinking about a major career change...
Oh, by the way Good Luck with your future too
 
@Klawin T

Do not compromise what you truly want out of life. For example, do not choose computer science because you already say it bores you. Choose the path you truly want.
That said, choose the most practical path that leads to what you truly want. The most practical path is the path that will give you the most options for a career, or the most expertise in a speciality.


On one hand, you're lucky to have a job with decent pay. On the other hand, you've been there a long time without any promotions or pay increases, so you really do need to look for a change.
 
Anyone who's able to share some experience or shed some light...
I would really appreciate anyone who's willing to give some advice.

I suspect that few of our type will find fulfilment in their career. For me the magic of life has come from my inward journey - and from my relationships with my loved ones, which has been a long hard journey, not a fairy story, and yet pure gold.

I'm talking from way down the road compared with you - I'll be 70 shortly. My career was both a means of supporting my family, and part of my inner journey - but it was peripheral to both even so. By all means find yourself a career that is as harmonious as possible with your inner self, but don't expect it to be the road you should travel where you can find yourself. Seek your destiny elsewhere, within, and use your job to 'feed' yourself and your dependants on the way. Now don't get me wrong, because there will be some of our type who do find a career that for them is the way their inner journey is taking them, but this is a rare and precious thing and the contingencies of our gifts and circumstances make it unlikely for most of us. Seek within - and treat it as an unexpected bonus if you find an external occupation to match - but it isn't essential. What is essential is that you remain true to yourself and this journey of a lifetime - and quite independent of what you are in the outer world .... thank goodness :)
 
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Hi, I'm turning 30 and I'm having a major crisis.
I've been working a normal 9-5 corporate job for few years now and i don't feel any personal growth / no promotion / repetitive boring tasks everyday etc. up to a point where i feel depressed and have no motivation to live my life. I just don't see myself belonging here...

I did consider about going back to school as i think it's the only way out but the problem is i can't really decide which major to take on. Kind of did some research on my own...

Health Science, Healthcare ( occupational therapist?, physician assistant? )
Nursing
Biology ( field is kind of broad )
Computer Science ( feels kind of boring to me )

Anyone who's able to share some experience or shed some light...
I would really appreciate anyone who's willing to give some advice.

Hi Klawin,

People have already been giving you really good advice. I encourage you to check out this video, a few years ago it really got me thinking about my own situation at the time:


Other than that, when it comes to making a choice, I would say maybe focus on degrees with which you can reasonably expect to find employment. Good luck.
 
Haha. Ren we can't go around telling people that history degrees are actually useful now, can we? It's immoral.

I would never encourage anyone to do a history degree... unless their family is loaded and they don't need to work :tearsofjoy:

I've never technically found work thanks to my history degree. I also have a masters in political science and that's what's helped me get all my jobs.
 
Haven’t a clue (he lied) but I suspect Magritte was well into it ;)

I won't say it here as it might shock the young generation among us. Those who are curious can do a little google search :tearsofjoy: