Are there any women who like infps or find honestly?

[Darc]

Okay so I had this short fling with an istp/istj and I actually like her a lot, I've never meant many istj over been that romantically attracted to, as I've found a lot of them to be kind of stuffy.

But like, there's been some conflict over our beliefs, but it wasn't that extreme and I felt like there was some wiggle room in that sense and I feel like we balance each other out very well, she says she really likes spending time with her but the thinking thing came up and she thinks I think too much and that it doesn't really matter like most people. I've been friending a lot of suggestions from Facebook and oddly enough most of them are America. In Canada everyone just wants me to accept the doctrine or whateve whilst they carry through (the upper classes) with whatever nonsense they feel and call it liberal but I hesitate to call it that.

Not very many people accept me and um there's like no subcultures and hardly anymore and being like an artist or culture is not realy very respected or appreciated anymore.


But I think I'm in some instances a typical Infp, but I've overcome a lot of my weaknesses, and I am not handicapped by being an Infp, but I find many will not tolerate my peculiarities. I'm a complicated person, but I'm good at being romantic which women really like. But everyone wants to push me into a corner, and control me. I don't really fit the status quo, I'm a out of the box thinker and I don' want to chase the cheese, but I do care about the world. But I guess, it' just typical Fi values stuff, like philosophy, art, and stuff like that.

Pretty much no one accepts me, but everyone says it's confidence but uh I feel like it's social norms most often hinging on very capitalism and consumerist goals. I keep thinking that once the music works out a bit for me I'll gain more acceptance that way perhaps kinda? I feel like people like me are more accepted that way, but then like I said it's hard to find any place that' very tolerant or accepting of art anymore, especially anything sensitive or thoughtful.

 

[Pin]

Before you put the blame on the rest of the world, you've got to ask yourself, "Am I the best I can be?"

Am I muscular enough to protect myself and loved ones?

Do I have enough money to provide for myself and loved ones?

Do I have enough control over my environment to ensure a high-quality of life for myself and loved ones?

If not, you've got work to do and shouldn't be worrying about women yet.

When you become a great man, women will come.

 

[Darc]

Before you put the blame on the rest of the world, you've got to ask yourself, "Am I the best I can be?"

Am I muscular enough to protect myself and loved ones?

Do I have enough money to provide for myself and loved ones?

Do I have enough control over my environment to ensure a high-quality of life for myself and loved ones?

If not, you've got work to do and shouldn't be worrying about women yet.

When you become a great man, women will come.

Yes, yes, it's always the individuals fault or dilemna.

Sure, right, I will magically conjure up hence fourth the magical ability of "confidence" despite how ever vague and self congratulatory it is.


So...the man must constantly work on himself, until he's good enough? So..it doesn't matter how long it take, or what other variables and scenarios are taking place? It's always simply the man's fault entirely?


So would that entail not using Fi then?

What about strong independent women, or like, helping people learn and grow thriugg relatioonships?
Not veing perfect? It seems like a little unfair and unrealistic as a standard to meet. Well, thanks to my low self esteem I feel less remorse for using women for sex now, and as well am getting better at repressing even more of my personality and who I am.


The thing that really irks me is that, I don't like being really blunt or super "assertive" (it seems overly to me) but in this post Darwinian type of world it all insinuates a weakness.

 

[Darc]

Before you put the blame on the rest of the world, you've got to ask yourself, "Am I the best I can be?"

Am I muscular enough to protect myself and loved ones?

Do I have enough money to provide for myself and loved ones?

Do I have enough control over my environment to ensure a high-quality of life for myself and loved ones?

If not, you've got work to do and shouldn't be worrying about women yet.

When you become a great man, women will come.

Could you...please elaborate what it means to be a "great man" beyond simply vaguely summing it up as a vague conception of "confidence" Seriously, I am a complex person, and an individual, my given set of personal feelings and thoughts that can vary quite widely to the next. Great, strong man, okay, please, what do you mean by this?

I am honestly heart broken over this one girl in my life, but the wound is very familiar. Generally, she just does not like my personality or who i am in that way. So, I just wanted to know if there's many women and what kind exactly find Fi and infp's attractive?
I've met lots of people and I would just like to have a clearer idea of whst to shoot or aim for, is that so much to ask?

Okay here we go, I think the one thing that really bothers people is that I am an individual and have my own beliefs, and it offends the majority of people I meet. I like to read and think a lot, I am complex, it offends and makes everyone angry and hates me.


Okay, okay positive traits of manliness.

I am well endowed, good in bed, I am romantic, I am a virtuso at the guitar and am good at music, Iz love art, literature, movies, I am physically active a bit but not a athlete, I am considered good.
Okay, we're using standards here "strong enough" what does that entail, when is it "good enough" and are you sure its not just outright social conformity?

I have a stronger will and work ethic then most people I know, I have fairly decent social skills, I can fake the gab, blah blah, I could get a decent job because post secondary is not that hard for me but I am not materialistic. Everyone hates me because I think for myself, hey it's starting to feel like everything is vaguely nationalist socialist, or instead of nationalist, "globalist" why is everyone such a tight wad lately, fuck.

 

[ZcM4xzkjgzCjytBc]

Yes, but they're all lesbians

 

[Darc]

Seriously, ugh,


I could go up to women and talk to them but most of them just expext "age, rank, file, job, position, position on hierachy" and it just feela ao unnatural and robotic to me, the confines and parameters of what is considered normal now. Besiddes, I am more then that, I am a complex person, but like I said it's mostly introverted feeling, my journey thus far and it offends and a lot of people think it's all a waste and in close relationships, is there more of a chance of them accepting me? No.


Okay, see movies? Its either good or bad and thats all there is to say. You just talk sbout how much money you make, how obedient you are and pointless drama, or drinking storirs, like fuck sorry.


Just kill me now.

 

[Darc]

Yes, but they're all lesbians

So only lesbians like Fi?

 

[ZcM4xzkjgzCjytBc]

So only lesbians like Fi?

No, but they got no choice c:

 

[Darc]

Okay, heres another thing...

I am a perciever, not a judger and I think in general because I am not super blunt and I do not speak definatively, it's seen as a weakness! So being melow, laid bakc and a perciever, is a mental illlness and weakness. Okay, okay.


So...another thing women are completely turned off. Coincedently it all just feels like this is alll aimed and being pointed at men like me, hmmm.

I mean agn she broke my heart, she was wondering why I dont speak in a definite way, why I say things like "i think" why I am so thoughtful, and then she told me I look at things too in depthly, I scramble them up in my mind and yeah, just a complete turn off!

Seriously, it comes to the point where i think ive been discrrimated for my intelligence.

Like, everyone thinks my intelligence is a mental illness wtf.

No one will listen or believe me, no matter what I do because I sm different! They keep rejecting me, eben to the point of careee and job, standings.

Everyone keeps thinking its a mental illness like fuck, but i cant find anyone who understand.

Fuxk i hate Canada noe its an awful, awful country, I am moving to America, since obviously I cannot be liberal.

 

[Darc]

It's really sad, I just don't find women attractive any more,except for physically.

I have been reading the game out of curiosity and a lot of it actually comes naturally to me, I think my only downfall is I treat women with respect and I am not cold or impersonal enough and it confuses their brains or does not turn them on. Like, they can like me, but then they get confused because I am not making them feel bad or something idk lol.

Its sad, I just don't see them the epway I used to a all, and I feel like I habe to emotionally remove myslef and ignore the part of me that wants to connect because its prevorbially


Its like "no woman, I am above you" and if you dont do thst they get angry and start fights with you and then wonder away to some other man. OOPS!!!!!!


I liked her so much, I had feelings for her more then anyone else, but that doesnt mean anything. Im just another man, in a long list of "men" and make suitors I imagine and nothing else or mode, that must give to the woman, but expect nothing in return. I feel like I'll neber quit get over her, but it's another long list of times i've been rejected, for hell if I know. Fuck, whats my problem!!!??? Lol, idk, no wonder I am a four.


Oh here is what I look, lol "nice guy syndrome"

I want to say its normal to hae flaws its only human, other times, lol, the flaw is the needle in the hay stack, they always find it. FlAwSssss, like diseases, you cant stop noticing them. Leprosy of the soul, I'm static, in the static age, tv's become too much like reality, and reality too much like tv.


SUBjecTivittyyyyyy!!! Zomf

 

[kfg(atj]

Okay, heres another thing...

I am a perciever, not a judger and I think in general because I am not super blunt and I do not speak definatively, it's seen as a weakness! So being melow, laid bakc and a perciever, is a mental illlness and weakness. Okay, okay.


So...another thing women are completely turned off. Coincedently it all just feels like this is alll aimed and being pointed at men like me, hmmm.

I mean agn she broke my heart, she was wondering why I dont speak in a definite way, why I say things like "i think" why I am so thoughtful, and then she told me I look at things too in depthly, I scramble them up in my mind and yeah, just a complete turn off!

Seriously, it comes to the point where i think ive been discrrimated for my intelligence.

Like, everyone thinks my intelligence is a mental illness wtf.

No one will listen or believe me, no matter what I do because I sm different! They keep rejecting me, eben to the point of careee and job, standings.

Everyone keeps thinking its a mental illness like fuck, but i cant find anyone who understand.

Fuxk i hate Canada noe its an awful, awful country, I am moving to America, since obviously I cannot be liberal.

Here’s a woman’s perspective. Take it or leave it.

That was annoying as hell to read. It was whiny and so “pity me”. Exactly the same experience I’ve had with the INFPs in my life. The Fi is so inwardly focused on how you all feel about things and you guys are so reluctant to change because you are so hell bent on being accepted exactly as you are. That’s your main problem. Reluctant to compromise.

If you want to be yourself in your entirety and not adjust some things in order to go with the flow of society, then go love yourself. Because that’s what will end up happening. At the end of the day, we are a planet of multiple personalities with multiple strengths and weaknesses. In order to co-exist peacefully amongst one another, even in a relationship, there has to be some acknowledgement of what sacrifice and compromise is. Because you’re bringing two individuals together. Why should you be the only one who gets to be and do whatever you want when you want? That’s ridiculous.

And as someone who was married for 11 years...as much as I hate to admit it - there are some things that are just never going to change. Money pays for your livelihood. Your career pays you money. The type of lifestyle you want will attract the women who also are ok with that lifestyle. If you want to travel around playing music without a care, then find a woman who is down for that. But don’t get upset over women having different standards for their lives. Money doesn’t buy happiness - but it buys peace of mind. That is the truth. Nothing will suffocate a relationship faster than money issues.

Sounds to me, like you need to focus on being with another XNFP. The romantic and idealistic side of XNFPs drive me crazy in the best way. Your guys’ imagination and zest for authenticity is magnetic and hard to resist. But y’all are stubborn as fuck.

Just my opinion.

 

[Pin]

Could you...please elaborate what it means to be a "great man" beyond simply vaguely summing it up as a vague conception of "confidence" Seriously, I am a complex person, and an individual, my given set of personal feelings and thoughts that can vary quite widely to the next. Great, strong man, okay, please, what do you mean by this?

I am honestly heart broken over this one girl in my life, but the wound is very familiar. Generally, she just does not like my personality or who i am in that way. So, I just wanted to know if there's many women and what kind exactly find Fi and infp's attractive?
I've met lots of people and I would just like to have a clearer idea of whst to shoot or aim for, is that so much to ask?

Okay here we go, I think the one thing that really bothers people is that I am an individual and have my own beliefs, and it offends the majority of people I meet. I like to read and think a lot, I am complex, it offends and makes everyone angry and hates me.


Okay, okay positive traits of manliness.

I am well endowed, good in bed, I am romantic, I am a virtuso at the guitar and am good at music, Iz love art, literature, movies, I am physically active a bit but not a athlete, I am considered good.
Okay, we're using standards here "strong enough" what does that entail, when is it "good enough" and are you sure its not just outright social conformity?

I have a stronger will and work ethic then most people I know, I have fairly decent social skills, I can fake the gab, blah blah, I could get a decent job because post secondary is not that hard for me but I am not materialistic. Everyone hates me because I think for myself, hey it's starting to feel like everything is vaguely nationalist socialist, or instead of nationalist, "globalist" why is everyone such a tight wad lately, fuck.

At the minimum, a great man has higher status (power, rank), more wealth, and more physical strength than the vast majority of men. A great man is great at being a man- period. This means adherence to traditional standards of masculinity.

 

[ZcM4xzkjgzCjytBc]

In my experience, INFPs hold on too tightly to their ideals to change, and adapt to the way the world actually works. Being likable - no matter what type you are - is a process of growth. If you don't want to change, I don't see how people will like you.

 

[acd]

Nobody here has the answer. This is one of those mystical Fi things where you have to really be honest with yourself... Drop all the pretenses. You are struggling because you are trying to get your own attention.

 

[Pin]

Yes, yes, it's always the individuals fault or dilemna.

Sure, right, I will magically conjure up hence fourth the magical ability of "confidence" despite how ever vague and self congratulatory it is.


So...the man must constantly work on himself, until he's good enough? So..it doesn't matter how long it take, or what other variables and scenarios are taking place? It's always simply the man's fault entirely?

It's not an individual man's fault that women generally love men who are physically strong, powerful, and financially successful. It's human nature, an aspect of our evolution.

What about strong independent women,

Mostly a fictitious contemporary ideal. Like strong and independent men, they hardly exist and have almost no use for relationships.

or like, helping people learn and grow thriugg relatioonships?

Most relationships arise from convenience, the desire to grow ourselves, not a desire to help others grow.

Not veing perfect? It seems like a little unfair and unrealistic as a standard to meet.

Not perfect, just better. We all have improvements to make.

Well, thanks to my low self esteem I feel less remorse for using women for sex now, and as well am getting better at repressing even more of my personality and who I am.

It's human nature to use one another. We all need help sometimes. There's nothing wrong with making yourself useful or using another person's talents/assets to improve yourself. This is how we grow.

 

[Darc]

Nobody here has the answer. This is one of those mystical Fi things where you have to really be honest with yourself... Drop all the pretenses. You are struggling because you are trying to get your own attention.

Because Fi is something one must over come? Its not pretenses, if anything I am too authentic and honest and I do not act enough.

 

[Darc]

It's not an individual man's fault that women generally love men who are physically strong, powerful, and financially successful. It's human nature, an aspect of our evolution.

Mostly a fictitious contemporary ideal. Like strong and independent men, they hardly exist and have almost no use for relationships.
Most relationships arise from convenience, the desire to grow ourselves, not a desire to help others grow.
Not perfect, just better. We all have improvements to make.It's human nature to use one another. We all need help sometimes. There's nothing wrong with making yourself useful or using another person's talents/assets to improve yourself. This is how we grow.

Well okay, I will just keep reading The Game then. So like, as far as everyone else is concerned there are all these arbitray standards and expectations for men, when does it end?

I think a lot of it's my background, amongst other things, I simply do not fit in at all...


A lot of it is Fi, and nothing more or less, bht it only adds to the irony and truth in what I am saying by trying to turn everything I say around and then objectify it. Please, I have enough confidence, again what mart be percieved as lack of confidence is again, my introverted feeling.

Fuck, can anyone just acknowledge this? Its nothing personal though, we all use each other for things, and lack any sense of moral fiber altogether, we know it is true. I mean I spent my whole life using my Fi simply so I coud get over it and then pretend like it never existed. Awesome.


So human beings are simple, black and white creatures that are quite simple in nature, and by which we have no free wilmin deciding things for ourselves basically. So okay, can we stip atteibuting everything negative to Fi? Oh well, mental illness, thats Fi, self qbsorbed. Whiny, negative "no cofidence" thats Fi.



How much more are we going to curtail thins and play the avoidance game, or prevorbially strawman me. Because we have no free will and are simply autnomous beings much likened to animals?

So what are you, an atheist, materialist??????
Science is supreme, sorry, I guess Fi pnly gets in the way.

 

[Darc]

I am just a body.

 

[acd]

Because Fi is something one must over come? Its not pretenses, if anything I am too authentic and honest and I do not act enough.

That is not at all what I said. When I read your posts, they all just seem like pretense to avoid the real problem. I don't know what the problem is, but your posts come off like you are building this elaborate self defense and paranoid world to justify or avoid something. Or maybe you just need significant mental health intervention. I don't know your issue. I only read the posts you submit. You know your issue; or can know your issue. That was my point. To be honest with yourself. Now you say you are an automaton. I think that's just a way to avoid real self examination. I bet you know you aren't an automaton. An automaton wouldn't be able to question it's purpose. We don't know why you feel like the world hates you. I'll bet the world doesn't hate you. Everyone faces romantic rejection. This is not unique to you and it does not mean that women want macho manly men to boss them around and treat them just awful enough.

The problem is not your authenticity or or mellowness or lack of conformity. Those things don't damn everyone.

 

[Pin]

Well okay, I will just keep reading The Game then. So like, as far as everyone else is concerned there are all these arbitray standards and expectations for men, when does it end?

I'm not telling you to read a self-help book that teaches you how to fake success. I'm telling you to actually become successful. Acquire a profession, save your money, buy a house, buy a car. Also, exercise and become physically strong. You've got to maximize your health.

Once you have these things (a profession, house, car) you'll be able to save for retirement. When your life is going in an upward professional trajectory, you'll regularly be meeting professional women, with one of which, you'll start a family (if you desire to become a parent).

Neither I, women, or society are asking you to do anything arbitrary. Being physically strong, professionally successful, and financially stable makes logical sense. There is nothing worthwhile gained in being frail, powerless, and poor, especially if you intend to become a husband and father someday.

I think a lot of it's my background, amongst other things, I simply do not fit in at all...


A lot of it is Fi, and nothing more or less, bht it only adds to the irony and truth in what I am saying by trying to turn everything I say around and then objectify it. Please, I have enough confidence, again what mart be percieved as lack of confidence is again, my introverted feeling.

Fuck, can anyone just acknowledge this? Its nothing personal though, we all use each other for things, and lack any sense of moral fiber altogether, we know it is true. I mean I spent my whole life using my Fi simply so I coud get over it and then pretend like it never existed. Awesome.

Stop moralizing, start mobilizing.

So human beings are simple, black and white creatures that are quite simple in nature, and by which we have no free wilmin deciding things for ourselves basically. So okay, can we stip atteibuting everything negative to Fi? Oh well, mental illness, thats Fi, self qbsorbed. Whiny, negative "no cofidence" thats Fi.



How much more are we going to curtail thins and play the avoidance game, or prevorbially strawman me. Because we have no free will and are simply autnomous beings much likened to animals?

So what are you, an atheist, materialist??????
Science is supreme, sorry, I guess Fi pnly gets in the way.

Free will is an illusion.

"You can do what you decide to do--but you cannot decide what you decide to do."
-Dr. Sam Harris