Sorcerer supreme
Newbie
- MBTI
- INTJ
Hey, INFJ ladies, I have a fun theoretical problem.
If I have technically known an INFJ female for about 2.5 years, but 1 of those years was spent away from them, going to Japan for academic reasons...should I communicate that I want to get to know her more after 2.5 years, especially if our contact is intermittent? I am determining if my feelings are worth having or if I should just kill them off, since there is also a 4-year gap in our ages. In the past, I wavered between an ENFP and an ENTP (at least on mbti testing), but recently I felt a change in myself and tested, and I am, oddly enough, a barely introverted INTJ. I don't know, I have different sides to myself. In the past, I tried to ask an INFJ female (not the same person) out and confess my feelings, and that went extremely poorly, so now I have different thoughts and insights that I feel should have done on hindsight.
For anyone wanting clarification of our time interacting with each other, this will likely be the chronological amount of time spent:
First, I have only known her for a month. Second, meeting up with a group for 2 days a week for 2 months in my hometown, which is some distance from my college. Third, then I go to college for a semester, so I won't see her except for breaks. Fourth, I meet up with a group on 2 days a week for a month. Fifth I leave to study abroad in Japan for a year. Sixth, I come back to have a semester at my college, only interacting with her and the group on breaks. Seventh, I spent an entire summer seeing her and the group on 2 days a week for 3 months.
After those 3 months, in an attempt to account for that age gap, instead of asking her out, I would give her my address so she could write me a letter if she wanted. This would keep us in touch over the semester, and give her time to think it over without seeing me, because I don't want our age difference to intimidate her. I also think we should get to know each other better before getting in a relationship. Since she also likes Batman, I could also say this funny pun/pickup line in a Batman voice to alleviate any pressure she might feel during that moment and bring an element of humor in and communicate my romantic interest.
What are the holes in this approach, and how would you recommend I handle it differently?
If I have technically known an INFJ female for about 2.5 years, but 1 of those years was spent away from them, going to Japan for academic reasons...should I communicate that I want to get to know her more after 2.5 years, especially if our contact is intermittent? I am determining if my feelings are worth having or if I should just kill them off, since there is also a 4-year gap in our ages. In the past, I wavered between an ENFP and an ENTP (at least on mbti testing), but recently I felt a change in myself and tested, and I am, oddly enough, a barely introverted INTJ. I don't know, I have different sides to myself. In the past, I tried to ask an INFJ female (not the same person) out and confess my feelings, and that went extremely poorly, so now I have different thoughts and insights that I feel should have done on hindsight.
For anyone wanting clarification of our time interacting with each other, this will likely be the chronological amount of time spent:
First, I have only known her for a month. Second, meeting up with a group for 2 days a week for 2 months in my hometown, which is some distance from my college. Third, then I go to college for a semester, so I won't see her except for breaks. Fourth, I meet up with a group on 2 days a week for a month. Fifth I leave to study abroad in Japan for a year. Sixth, I come back to have a semester at my college, only interacting with her and the group on breaks. Seventh, I spent an entire summer seeing her and the group on 2 days a week for 3 months.
After those 3 months, in an attempt to account for that age gap, instead of asking her out, I would give her my address so she could write me a letter if she wanted. This would keep us in touch over the semester, and give her time to think it over without seeing me, because I don't want our age difference to intimidate her. I also think we should get to know each other better before getting in a relationship. Since she also likes Batman, I could also say this funny pun/pickup line in a Batman voice to alleviate any pressure she might feel during that moment and bring an element of humor in and communicate my romantic interest.
What are the holes in this approach, and how would you recommend I handle it differently?
