Recent content by Paideia

I can't be responsible if you're not willing to extend me the courtesy of understanding what I wrote in the spirit it's written. You have a chip on your shoulder for some reason, and you project like it's your job. I have no problem with vulnerability, as indicated in the earlier post. But...

I'm not gonna bother, Hunter. Example: I wrote "our friend is desperate". From that you extrapolated a definition of desperate you believe I invoked and it had nothing to do with what I wrote. It was based on some projection of yours on who you think I am as a person - a person you clearly...

Don't worry. I know exactly what my strengths and weaknesses are, and this is not one of weaknesses. I think you'd do well to read what I wrote in the spirit it's written. You have already decided that I am a bad person even before you objectively considered my input. That is the wrong order...

You are oblivious to rational discussion and you also refuse to acknowledge facts. Good luck with your life :) PS. also this gem "your advice is based on hearsay and own failed experiences". I'm really amazed at how you make things so personal so fast. Are you very angry and bitter? Do you only...

There's nothing wrong with that. At all. It's exactly what I recommend. But he's not going to get to know her well, if she is the only person he knows. Listen, I'm not sure what your experience with American men is. I get the impression you're projecting your own bad experiences, but I could...

never mind... can't be bothered to argue with someone who prefers to make the discussion about framing my perspective in terms of weak character instead of what is objectively the best approach. The accusation of manipulation is appropriately ironic coming from you, Hunter.

Ok, this will be the last input from my part, because we're not going to agree on the objective truth. First off, I'm not American, so you're just exposing your own weird prejudices. It doesn't strengthen your argument. Did I write about tricking her into anything? No. You said that. That's a...

People date people they get along with. If there's chemistry, you'll go out. There are two sides to this: On the one hand, I didn't say he should tell this INFJ he is seeing other girls. But it would be to his advantage if she found herself wondering this, unsure what the real answer is. IF...

Dude, you can speculate all you want. Truth is, ENxPs, assuming one is not socially retarded, and INFJs will have a natural way of speaking to each other, so you don't need to worry about following a manuscript with her. If you hang out with her, you ALWAYS have to be escalating. Holding...

This is no doubt true. But I know at least I have a very vivid imagination, and our infatuated friend might be the same. I asked about the sexualizing because really, in the end, there's no point theorizing about all this. He's got to make a move. It sounds like he hasn't felt the opportunity...

How much of a difference would it make to the posters here if they'd been making out when they'd been seeing each other and she did in fact say romantic things and dropped other indicators of serious interest during their time together, but the rest was true? Has he simply failed to sexualise...

How old are you and old is she, and which part of the world?

Ok here's an update. I wanted to be direct, but decided it could quickly be too much too early, so I decided to go half-way, since she's not back for a few weeks still. I wrote: "well, in any circumstance it was a nice surprise to hear for you :) go ahead and contact me if you want some...

Thanks EventH... I will give it a couple of days and the drop something along the line of what TheDaringHatTrick said. She didn't respond to my last message so I think the "good luck with that :)" was a convo-ender, but no harm in being more forthright after I've given her a few days to respond.

Oh I wish it were that simple. The problem is that asking outright is a bad strategy for romance. Romance necessarily hinges on degrees of uncertainty and, for girls especially, mystery. I know this may be a gross generalization, but as a rule it has helped me a great deal so far. I used to be...