I am excessively competitive. Its something my father drove in my as a child when I saw him, to get ahead. I couldnt just be good I had to be the best. And it sort of seems like in some things at least it was me trying to get him to be proud of me, even after so many years I think I have an internal check mark, is this good enough for dads approval? Its much harder to turn that off than I thought because I havent been able to, but I like being competitive, I like being able to be better than other people are certain things, it draws attention to me in a positive way, I am not a sore winner though I am always gracious, but my competitiveness really comes out after I lose, I go obsessive compulsive on improving to beat the person to beat me. I dunno its wierd.