Things That Freak Introverts Out | Page 2 | INFJ Forum

Things That Freak Introverts Out

Signing up for a ton of meetup events on meetup.com, having every intention to go, but then realize there's too much people, all complete strangers, going, and then cancel at the last minute.

Or have your own meetup group, having a ton of people signed up, feel petrified *hyperventilates*, than feel happy only two or three actually show up leaving your heart less palpitated, and allowing you to take deep breaths again.
 
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Being put on the spot to deliver a speech off the top of your head during commencement - someone passed out and I had to do this. I was blushing so badly.

Performing something physical, like a dance, that you aren't confident about in front of a crowd.

When a guy I have a crush on sees me, locks eyes and crosses the room toward me with purpose, I have to talk myself out of running the other way.
 
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An unexpected knock on the door.

Maybe that’s because I’m in my nest, and it means disrupting the cocooning, and I have to put on my game face.

Sometimes I have just not answered. My time, my place, get outta my face!

---

I really do think I am an ambivert, because a few of the things mentioned in this thread sound fun, and a couple I know I am good at. :p


Cheers,
Ian
 
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James said:
I love this, thread. The 'going around the room' introductions, I hated them. As I got older, I always used to try and insert a joke of some kind. People (including the extroverts) are usually so nervous they will laugh at anything.
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This reminds me... I had an experience with 'going around the room.' (No I'm not promiscuous) we were supposed to introduce and tell one thing we liked and one thing we didn't like about ourselves. Nervous as hell, and with false confidence I said I hated how I let my finger and toenails grow uncomfortably long until I finally decide I'm going to trim them, then I decide to put it off for one more day, go lay on the couch to pick my nose, slice the inside of my nose and lay there hating myself as I'm bleeding until I pass out. Then followed that with, I love myself, I'm perfect in every way. Some people stared, some laughed, the facilitator just said, "OK" and moved on like it was nothing.
 
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Phone calls (I screen every single one)
Knocks on the door
When someone says, "I need to speak with you for a minute."
Large crowds don't bother me anymore but used to
Any kind of public speaking
I coach baseball which I enjoy doing one on one (ie quietly) but loathe talking with the parents as a group
Extroverting, small talk, hand shaking with people I have met through my kids' school.

My social skills are pretty decent as far friendly banter/small talk but I don't necessarily enjoy it. Well, sometimes I do. There's some good people in the world
 
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The next time I'm forced to introduce myself in this unnatural 'going around the room' way. I'm going to say "I'm Batman" in my deepest voice (so falsetto).

In reality ? I'd struggle to be convincing as Robin. Therein lies the comedy....
 
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James said:
The next time I'm forced to introduce myself in this unnatural 'going around the room' way. I'm going to say "I'm Batman" in my deepest voice (so falsetto).

In reality ? I'd struggle to be convincing as Robin. Therein lies the comedy....
Click to expand...


Anything like this...?

I'm Batman!
 
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Leaving my Batman fantasies aside ( yes of course I need therapy) I did recall one other thing that freaks me out as an introvert.

Uninvited hugs\touching.

On my last day at work before leaving, it was terrible. I was hugged multiple times by different women, who I think were all thrilled to see the "glow in the dark" brightness of my blushes. I eventually hid in an office. I'm fine with handshakes, but hugging ? Nope.

I don't entertain any delusions that it was my George Clooney looks/charm that caused this. I'm more of a untidy, unfit, uglier version of Mark Ruffalo... They just genuinely just wanted to say goodbye, I'd worked there for a long time.

Years before as a shy young teenager, I knew one manager who was very tactile. She was a lovely lady, over 20 years older than me, who was very friendly with everyone. Whenever I ate lunch she'd come across to check my food was healthy, but she inevitably hugged me each time. It was excruciating. Eventually I stopped eating in the office and used to go out for dinner instead.

Why do people do this ? Oh yes, it's their extrovert nature. Grrr...
 
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Gist said:
At job interview,
Interviewer: So, tell me about yourself.
Me: Uh, umm, I'm an introvert??? :oops:
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Interviewer: Tell me about yourself.
Me: Well, clearly I'm handsome, you can trust your eyes. I'm amazing in every way and I excel at everything except most things.

*Mutual laughter*

Me: (believes I lightened the mood and dodged the question)
Interviewer: No really, why should I hire you?
*crickets*
 
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One of my INFJ friends interviews well. My reaction is always, "Traitor! Traitor to our kind!"
 
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I don't think an interview is fair. I mean, do your job and see why you really would do well hiring me.

Everything asks for a password nowadays. Some programs are wise to using two fake initials for a name. Don't like 1866 for a birth year? Fine: try 1966. I don't like it even when it's a robot. Just let me in. Copy this so we'll know you're not a robot? I'll make that first on my agenda of new robots: copying captcha.

I hate when my electric gate doesn't close. I'll spend a half hour in the rain to fix it so nobody can come in. Any of you use hidden cameras?

People sometimes wonder why I talk about leaving on a nice yacht, job in hand, not caring where it's going. I know I can bring my dog. Don't like me? Drop me off somewhere and I'll be fine.

Why we get so lonely may have something to do with these things.
 
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Too much... enthusiasm and chattiness, but this is more so the case when I've already had a long day of socializing, and my "interacting with people batteries" are worn out. In those moments, silence and calm are greatly cherished, so that I can recharge and unwind. I mean, I'm a human being, we're social creatures (to varying degrees), but I do have my limits. Sometimes I have to forcibly hermit myself away so I can get just a tiny bit of oh so crucial quiet time. And some people can just go on and on - right after they've come up to you when you're out in public, headphones on, reading a book in your hands. I highly value respecting others' space, so this can be especially odious to me.

dog-cat-person.png
 
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@James I hear you on the uninvited touching. In my last workplace people were constantly hugging me and it drove me crazy! I wrote in the communications book, please don't hug me because it just makes me feel uncomfortable, but that just seemed to make people want to hug me more! One of my colleagues would hug me really tight and press her whole body against me, I hated it! And don't get me started on sleazy back rubs! Skin crawling!

To me it is just not a respectful act. I am not a teddy bear! There is a zone that is ok for brief touching, which is shoulder and forearm. Not outside that zone!
 
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invisible said:
@James I hear you on the uninvited touching.
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This gets me too. Several years ago I decided I was going to do something about it. I try to make them touching me as awkward as I feel when they do that. For instance, when someone (male or female, it doesn't matter)comes in for an unwelcomed hug, I'll softly say in their ear, "don't let go you're giving me a boner," or something along those lines.
 
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Milktoast Bandit said:
Interviewer: Tell me about yourself.
Me: Well, clearly I'm handsome, you can trust your eyes. I'm amazing in every way and I excel at everything except most things.

*Mutual laughter*

Me: (believes I lightened the mood and dodged the question)
Interviewer: No really, why should I hire you?
*crickets*
Click to expand...

oh I hate that question. and interviews.. I wish we could play "answer with a question" at interviews and still get the job hahaha

"why wouldn't you hire me?"
 
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