Your views on CHRISTMAS | INFJ Forum

Your views on CHRISTMAS

INFJok

INFJok

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Nov 27, 2012
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As everyone knows Christmas is coming up and fa la la la. The lights, the commercials, the sales, but it all feels superficial to me...and its getting a little old.
Why can't people be kind to others year round?
Why does it take a slew of lights and an intruder in a red suit to get people excited?
Is celebrating holidays more of a sensor-thing?
All views celebrated!
 
Dunno. I don't care for Christmas.
 
I don't see it as superficial. Christmas is a time when you stop to think about what someone you love would want instead of just thinking about yourself. Sure, we can say that these gifts are just things but things can also hold meaning. Things are tools that can be used for making memories. For example, my parents bought my sister the game LIFE one year. We had so much fun playing it that even now that we are all grown, we still make time to get together to play. It's filled with sore winners, sore losers, lots of laughs and lots of love.

We have our differences and we don't always get along year round, but when we come together to play that game, we have so much fun. And somehow, in that moment, our disagreements fade. That game pulls us back to what's important...each other.
All that from a Christmas present given to an 8yr old girl.

So no, I do not see Christmas as superficial. Some of these gifts have created wonderful memories for me. And memories are meaningful, therefore, Christmas and the gifts it brings are meaningful. And that could never be classified as superficial.

So I suppose it's all in how you choose to view it.
 
Holidays are what you make of them. I agree with [MENTION=12327]Anywhere But Here[/MENTION], I think it is more or less a wake-up call for some people to think about others in their lives needs and happiness. Of course the holidays could put stress on people due to finances and troubled families that don't want to bother with one another. A lot of it is all a bunch of propaganda too. But I don't think it discourages thinking about/being good to others in general outside of the holidays, rather, is just a catalyst to stop and think about others, and how you've been treating them. We have an option to ignore then holidays too, as much as we have options to ignore others outside of holidays if we choose to.
 
It's good if you think people are good and it isn't if you think they aren't.
 
I don't have any strong opinions about Christmas. I think it's really nice that people give each other gifts though. And I think it's really, really nice when those gifts are coming my way. :m168:
 
Also I might argue that habitualized giving on a holiday may on the whole actually reduce kindness for the rest of a year. I argue this for a few reasons:

1. If we depend on a regular reminder, we stop needing to think about being kind and giving. The supposed wake up call will handle it. Therefore a lot of people who could be nicer are not because it is NOT Christmas.

2. Depending on a regular reminder also sets up a form of achievement where one does the best the can and puts everything into one day, and once they've done that they feel accomplished for the entire year and then slack off.

Basically it comes down to two branches:

Is it Christmas? Race around to create epic conspicuous holiday party and give awesome presents
Is it not Christmas? I don't have to do shit for you because it isn't Christmas
 
And don't watch TV around Christmas if you're sensitive to the sappy fakeness of these crappy made for TV movies. That'll drive home the superficiality.

I'm not talking about stuff like It's a Wonderful Life. I'm talking about this new low budget trite garbage with incredibly stilted acting and over used stereotypes and dead tropes. That'll drain the life right out of Christmas if you're not one who is able to fall for that mess.
 
I dunno. Grumpy Cat's Worst Christmas Ever was pretty good.
 
It's a designated visitation period. I find it helpful.

Otherwise, it's a milestone on the way to spring.
 
Good points.
I used to really like Christmas when I was younger and honestly niave regarding the world. Then as I grew older I liked it because family was around. Now I am having a very hard time with it because I recognize by observing it I am supporting supporting fiction as if it is truth. I am contributing to the illusion that so many people are afflicted by in this world.
And yet I still like the whole Christmas thing just absent the religious significance associated with it. Its ...disconcerting for me.
 
sprinkles said:
And don't watch TV around Christmas if you're sensitive to the sappy fakeness of these crappy made for TV movies. That'll drive home the superficiality.

I'm not talking about stuff like It's a Wonderful Life. I'm talking about this new low budget trite garbage with incredibly stilted acting and over used stereotypes and dead tropes. That'll drain the life right out of Christmas if you're not one who is able to fall for that mess.
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I just watched Merry Frigging Christmas because it was at Redbox and had Robin Williams in it. I very badly would like to have my two hours back if for nothing other than cleaning my toliet. Why did they even make this movie?
 
sprinkles said:
It's good if you think people are good and it isn't if you think they aren't.
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Not true. I think most people are assholes.

But I still like Christmas time. :)
 
Where are you Christmas? Why can't I find you? Why have you gone awayyyyyyyyyyyayyyyy
 
Christmas stresses me out. I used to love it. Now I hate it. Bah humbug.
 
I think Christmas is kind of fucked up.

The mall near my house requires police officers to block off certain lane ways and to direct traffic in and out of the parking lots because it gets so busy. There is something about thousands and thousands of people trying to cram into a shopping center in a panic to shop for other people that is kind of disturbing to me.

My family hasn't done much to "celebrate" Christmas since I was a teenager. A substantial part of my family died before I was born or in my younger years so we never had big family gatherings. Not for a very long time. I haven't given presents since I was a teen. One year I spent 300 dollars on Christmas gifts when I was in high school and I had this sort of epiphany that it was kind of fucked up to be doing that, so I just stopped altogether. This year my parents are now legally separated and even more people are dead. I bought "presents" in the sense that I gave practical gifts as my parents start new lives individually. I sent money for my sister as she now has a child of her own and felt compelled to indulge in Christmas for them. Even then, I am a very practical gift giver.

The commercialization of it escapes me but I haven't had television in nearly a decade. I am not exposed to commercials or Christmas movies or other "specials" that you might find on TV. I think for this reason I don't find it stressful now and I don't feel the expectations that some might to participate in Christmas like things. I think giving to people is nice, but I don't like all of the frenzy about it.
 
SpecialEdition said:
I think Christmas is kind of fucked up.

The mall near my house requires police officers to block off certain lane ways and to direct traffic in and out of the parking lots because it gets so busy. There is something about thousands and thousands of people trying to cram into a shopping center in a panic to shop for other people that is kind of disturbing to me.

My family hasn't done much to "celebrate" Christmas since I was a teenager. A substantial part of my family died before I was born or in my younger years so we never had big family gatherings. Not for a very long time. I haven't given presents since I was a teen. One year I spent 300 dollars on Christmas gifts when I was in high school and I had this sort of epiphany that it was kind of fucked up to be doing that, so I just stopped altogether. This year my parents are now legally separated and even more people are dead. I bought "presents" in the sense that I gave practical gifts as my parents start new lives individually. I sent money for my sister as she now has a child of her own and felt compelled to indulge in Christmas for them. Even then, I am a very practical gift giver.

The commercialization of it escapes me but I haven't had television in nearly a decade. I am not exposed to commercials or Christmas movies or other "specials" that you might find on TV. I think for this reason I don't find it stressful now and I don't feel the expectations that some might to participate in Christmas like things. I think giving to people is nice, but I don't like all of the frenzy about it.
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I would "like" this post but there is something odd in liking post where people say real life things that suck. Meaning all the loss you have had in your life. So Ill just say that I relate.
For myself growing up as a kid my parents celebrated it and it was great. Now...I cant figure out whats wrong with me. Its like Im not willing to give up this security blanket because I think it might bring me happiness in the future if I could just suspend my disbelief like I do at the movies. The problem is, this is real life and theres no place for suspending reality in it.
Im in this weird suspended place between Christmas and just passing the day off as any other day.
I k ow you care. :) Its just that I can relate.
 
Christmas is great. Its the one time of year where we can say, see everything is better, the worlds really not so bad after all.

If people really believed whats preached about at Christmas "good will toward man" the world would be a much different place.
 
Eventhorizon said:
I would "like" this post but there is something odd in liking post where people say real life things that suck. Meaning all the loss you have had in your life. So Ill just say that I relate.
For myself growing up as a kid my parents celebrated it and it was great. Now...I cant figure out whats wrong with me. Its like Im not willing to give up this security blanket because I think it might bring me happiness in the future if I could just suspend my disbelief like I do at the movies. The problem is, this is real life and theres no place for suspending reality in it.
Im in this weird suspended place between Christmas and just passing the day off as any other day.
I k ow you care. :) Its just that I can relate.
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I feel nothing about the people in my life that have died. I have been surrounded by death since a young age so I don't think I grieve about it or feel about it in the way that most people might. To me it's just kind of a fact of life that people are going to die and as a result sometimes you don't have a family to gather with anymore.

I find some of the typical celebrations to be very empty.

My boyfriend's family is big on getting together for holidays like this. They are having a celebration on Christmas Eve that I am attending. I like going not just because it is Christmas but because I like being around a family that is close and enjoys being together and who has a lot of fun. It's interesting to see so many people come together just to be amongst one another. It's foreign to me but it also gives me the opportunity to integrate better into his family by going, even if I am not into the holiday specifically. I like to participate in that but do feel like an outsider looking in.

I don't think you have to suspend reality necessarily. I think it's perhaps suspending your knowledge of the motivation for getting together (gifts/money) and perhaps enjoying the time together for what it is. I do find that some people bring too much in the way of politics/religion into the mix and it doesn't really mix well with the commercialization of it, but so it goes.
 
I like Christmas. I don't think it's superficial, as others have said, Christmas is how you make it. Some people get stressed every Christmas, when have to buy many gifts and pack them, send them etc. Also make all the Christmas foods. For me Christmas is about relaxing and spending time with the family and enjoying life when normally not able to do it middle of busy work week.
 
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