Would you date someone who is HIV positive? | INFJ Forum

Would you date someone who is HIV positive?

Apone

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Jan 19, 2012
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Would you?

I want to hear what other people have to say before I launch into one of my trademark boring rants.
 
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If they were mindblowingly amazing I would but then I'd make them wear a full suit of bubble wrap all the time.

I would date them in hopes of a cure for HIV being developed sometime within our relationship.
 
It would be a bit unfair not to, if it's a great person...
HIV positve people are no pest holes! Just wear a condom.
 
No, this may sound very prejudice, but they have an infectious disease for which there is no cure.
I would not and could not endanger my own life and the lives of my children, all it takes is one mistake and I would have a death sentence.

I could not put myself in a position where I get close to someone and I know that they are going to die soon and I would lose them.

If I did date and catch HIV then my role as a parent would be over and I'm not prepared to go down that path.

It wouldn't be a problem for me if they were my friend, but that is as close as it would be.

This is my personal opinion and is no way intended to be prejudiced towards people who are HIV positive.
 
Friendship? Yes.
Date? No.

I like sex. And often. And I couldn't see myself enjoying it knowing that I was putting my life at risk. Even with protection things can still go wrong and I would never put myself in that predicament. A strong NO for me.
 
I'm sure there are some qualities that would outweigh the cons of HIV.

If he is very very very good looking, really rich, super charming, interesting, had a good heart, loves me to death and worships the ground I walk on I would think about it! :D
 
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No, I wouldn't. As a parent, I couldn't gamble with my life like that.
 
I feel utterly terrible by saying I wouldn't date someone I know has HIV. If I was already in a relationship and it turned out he had HIV then I wouldn't give up on him. We'd still be together, sleep together and all.
 
Just dating? No. But I couldn't abandon someone I cared a lot because of it. It'd be too cruel. Even if we wouldn't be a real couple, I'd still want to support them.
 
I've known a lot of people that have.
I don't know of anyone catching HIV from the infected ones they dated.

I probably couldn't now. But I'm sure as a kid I would have. But it sounds too complicated and I'm sure I'd have too many problems. I wish I could say yes no problem. But being honest, I couldn't.
I guess it depends. I knew girls that were call girls.

(Background) I was a kid from a broken family and focused on getting high rather than school. This was all before I turned 21. I got in trouble, almost got arrested for a few things. I was sent to rehab and spent a few years in NA.
during that time I met a lot of people. Dated a lot of people. A lot of people I met there were broken. A lot were HIV and they have all since died.


That's was a time long ago. I met my wife a couple years after that time. If you knew us you might be surprised. I probably don't come across like someone with a troubled childhood.


All that to say I don't think I could date someone HIV. Although you might think I'd be more sympathetic. Or willing. But somehow it's made me the opposite.
 
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I would not absolutely say no, but in general I would not want to for the same reason that I would not date someone who smokes, does drugs, etc.. It is not even about about the risk of transmission. I want to grow old with my significant other, and AIDS prevents that. They can't cure it (well, one guy was cured, but in general it can't be done), and every drug they throw at it only lasts so long before it mutates and the drug becomes ineffective. The disease can take decades off of your life.

http://longevity.about.com/od/longevityandillness/a/HIV-AIDS-life.htm

It says 30-40 years for a 20 year old, and that is only assuming the drugs last and work for that long.
 
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Just dating? No. But I couldn't abandon someone I cared a lot because of it. It'd be too cruel. Even if we wouldn't be a real couple, I'd still want to support them.

This.

The friendship would supersede physicality.
Connection and care > gratification.
 
It wouldn't matter to me. Mostly because hey, sex is not a big thing for me and I personally can live without it. I prefer intimacy over sex. But HIV is not AIDS and AIDS is a little more difficult to deal with (AIDS is the end stage of a totally compromised immune system). HIV+ means you have the possibility of developing AIDS but not everyone who is HIV+ develops AIDS. And it can take years for AIDS symptoms to show.

If you're sexually active and you don't use protection, you probably should have yourself tested every so often. Just sayin'.

For research - http://aids.gov/hiv-aids-basics/hiv-aids-101/statistics/
 
Tough question. The easy answer is no--for all the reason's stated above. I tend to avoid absolutes though because the Powers That Be like to screw with you. So I would say, I would probably be extremely hesitant to get sexually involved with someone who was HIV postive. Since dating is basically the ritual leading up to sex, it would be difficult to see myself dating someone HIV postive but not outside the realm of possibilities. I don't put out easily....so sex on the first date normally isn't in the cards.
 
No. I can't deal with the care and consideration required to be with someone who is. I'd be resentful as all hell.