Why do people move out? | INFJ Forum

Why do people move out?

floatingbridge

Life's a ride
Donor
Aug 21, 2009
1,557
334
642
MBTI
INFJ
What are the reasons that people move out of their parents homes? How do you know when is the right time to move out? Do you have to be at the right place financially, emotionally...? Why is it that some move as soon as they can, and others stay as long as possible?

I know, silly questions.
 
What are the reasons that people move out of their parents homes? How do you know when is the right time to move out? Do you have to be at the right place financially, emotionally...? Why is it that some move as soon as they can, and others stay as long as possible?

I know, silly questions.

I don't think this is a silly question at all! It's actually something I struggled with, and even at my age- I still consider whether I should move back home!

Our generation is in an interesting financial climate. Compared to other generations, we're in higher education much longer, have larger student debt, and make less money. This means that it's often not financially responsible for us to move out until we're finished school and have a secure job. This is also happening much later in life!

This discussion actually talks about how the economics for our generation are much different than our parents- thus we have to change our expectations.

[video=youtube;8nLZC7Mwgeg]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8nLZC7Mwgeg[/video]

Additionally, our generation has a much different parent-child relationship. This change in the relationship, is both good and bad. Parents tend to make staying at home much easier and much more 'okay' than they use to - but they also recognize the economic strain.

It's difficult to know when you should move out. I think you have to consider a range of pros/cons. I found the most difficult thing was the feeling that I needed to move out to meet some 'normal' standard or ideal for being an adult...but it's not the case. You can be a responsible adult and still live at home.

A good way to transition into whether or not you should move out, is maybe start paying your parents rent (just a bit) and setting up some 'rules' so it's more like you're a roommate, rather than their child. Buying your own groceries and preparing your own meals is another great way to start that transition.

Living on your own is great and awesome....but there are SOOO many perks of being at home!!
 
I had to move back home because it just wasn't financially feasible to pay to live rent/buy a home. I used to feel extremely ashamed and regret because I'm way past the point where I'm supposed to be living at home at least according to the culture I live vs. the one I'm from. I stopped feeling badly because it just can't be helped at the moment. I had moved out a few years back, but got myself in debt just because of rent and expenses, so it didn't work for me. I miss having my own space of course, but i had to prioritize, and figure out what was more important. Once of course i'm in a better spot, I'll move out. What's great is that I don't hate myself for it anymore.
 
In my experience and with the people I talk to, the group of people I know have moved out or rather strive to move out and fail because their parents were never accepting of who they are. Most everyone in my social group has a parent or parents that range from crazy and physically abusive to emotionally abusive to just completely un-accepting which is a kind of emotional abuse in its own. In other words, the people I know have moved out or tried to because their life at home isn't safe, either for them physically or emotionally. And that's a shitty thing :/
 
In western culture you're considered a sponge by some accounts if you don't move out and make your own living.

However this is actually a new thing in the past few hundred years. Older cultures did not do this as much and in some eastern cultures it is still not done - several generations would live and still do live in the same household. It is easier for them to live and work and care for each other as a family that way, and not all places have the luxury of having a separate home for every family member.

It's just how society is. There's truly no objective reason for it.