Why do people do the things they do? | INFJ Forum

Why do people do the things they do?

Quinlan

Quinlan

Right the First Time!
Jun 12, 2008
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Use your INFJ insight into the human mind and explain the possible motivations of some of the bizarre behaviours that people display (explanations from other types are good too).

First up:

Why do some people like to risk the lives of others and their own by being reckless behind the wheel? (I'm thinking of what we call here "boy racers" young guys who drive around in over powered cars, with bald tyres etc..)
 
awesome. This topic has kept me busy almost entirely on its own for the past 5 or so years.

It's a split, I think... working off of experience from my friends (I'm a 19 yr old guy now, so we're just growing out of that stage... sample size is about 15 people). About 7/10 of them seriously subconsciously act as if they couldn't get hurt. Of course they would never say they were invincible, but they sure act like they are (it's the classic "well nothing bad has happened yet..." complex. The fact that they're still alive and racing means they haven't hit anything yet... so why would it now?)

2 of those 10 probably know they could get hurt, but risk it because they have confidence in their ability to drive fast. In all honesty, they probably do. The remaining 1/10 or so honestly don't care whether they live or die, so long as they're not injured so badly that they're permanently maimed. These are the guys who'll sit in the passenger seat of someone who drives crazy and stupid and choose not to wear a seat belt so that they're sure they'll die if hit. If they actually care about other people, they'll sooner drive off the road into an inanimate object than nail a living person, even though the resulting crash would be worse for them.



...what's up with all the rhetorical questions during conversation? (How often do you think "hey, how're you doing? How was your summer?" gets asked from someone who actually means it?)
 
I'd like to know too because I work with one of these boy racers and he and I used to drive together now and then. He not only raced but he blared his music with no signs of any consideration. It wouldn't cross his mind to offer me a choice about the music ever. As he's racing and blaring he's also talking about ..... himself. Basically I think these guys are completely self centred so much so that they really don't care about other people. Guys like this only care about what they can get from others. They 'do what they will' basically.
Hopefully they grow out of it without hurting too many people along the way.
I ended up telling my boss I didn't want to work with him anymore and she didn't blink, just said ok and I haven't had to since.
The other day he was trying to beat the train and the road barrier came right down on his windshield smashing it to smitherines. He managed to back up safely and wasn't hurt but I'm very glad he was alone that day.
Immature narcissists are a pain in the arse!
 
So for some of them their lack of foresight is from a trial and error learning style. They can't see further than the next "rush"?

To me their must be a lot of peacocking going on, I see it as an extension of competition for mates. Winning a race /taking risks / having a pretty/loud car are attempted displays of dominance. Like it or not but a lot of young women are excited by risk takers. Are these guys subconciously (or conciously) trying to get the girl?

I have no problem with risk takers but what bothers me about this is the lives of innocents that they put in their hands. I would like to see these people take it to the race track, I would admire them for that. So for these people is the reward (the rush) so much greater than the risk (killing someone/ruining their own lives by killing someone)?
 
The only risk they worry about is getting in trouble with the police. Other people's wellbeing never enters my co-worker's mind, he genuinely thinks he's uber cool.
 
I think that's true, that the only risk considered is trouble with the police. I never picked up on the fast driving even in the slightest (again... must be a personality thing not to be affected by anyone around me), but I know narcissism and complete self-centeredness doesn't always go hand in hand with driving fast. It's also very unlikely that women have anything to do with it, because everyone I know who drove fast still drove fast when women weren't around. It may still be a reputation thing, looking good for friends and such (in fact I'm almost sure that has something to do with it), but it's also not always an "impress the girl" thing.

There are definitely a few different reasons for it... but who knows how many for sure.
 
When my co-worker shows up for work we can hear him coming from half a block away, he's on his second set of speakers in a year. I asked him why he does it and he said, "I like to be seen."
 
I think you secretly fancy him, sumone!!!! :D
 
Good ......... thing ......... I'm .............. not ............. a ............. mod! ;)
 
LOL. Sorry! I love teasing sometimes.. :)
 
http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fusea ... D436860066

This guy wrote an awesome series about apha, beta, and loner type male personalities. As well as a wonderful article about the male mind. I highly suggest all the women here read it. Very enlightening and a great way to start 'guiding' or 'managing' (if you want to be polite) the men in your life (or manipulating and Pavlovian conditioning if you dont' care to be polite).

Sounds to me like your unsafe vehicular operator and musically challenged co-worker is an insecure beta male attempting to pose as an alpha.
 
I dont have any insight for you all I know is that when I see them speed down the freeway at 120 mph on their bullet bikes with no helmet I feel FEAR and sadness because im so afraid I will see them splattered all over the highway in the next ten miles...
 
frozen_water said:
It's also very unlikely that women have anything to do with it, because everyone I know who drove fast still drove fast when women weren't around. It may still be a reputation thing, looking good for friends and such (in fact I'm almost sure that has something to do with it), but it's also not always an "impress the girl" thing.
Click to expand...

It isn't important whether girls are around or not, why do they care about their reputation amongst other guys? Because they want to be at the top of the pack. Why do they want to be at the top of the pack? To get their pick of the girls.

I doubt much of it is done conciously, I think that is what people find most disturbing about that sort of behaviour it is so basic/instinctual, very uncivilised.

...what's up with all the rhetorical questions during conversation? (How often do you think "hey, how're you doing? How was your summer?" gets asked from someone who actually means it?)
Click to expand...

I find this interesting too, I assume that at first they were genuine questions interested people asked each other, somewhere along the way someone decide it was rude not to ask even if the interest wasn't genuine (probably an SJ :lol: ) and it spread from there.
 
alcyone said:
Sounds to me like your unsafe vehicular operator and musically challenged co-worker is an insecure beta male attempting to pose as an alpha.
Click to expand...

That sounds exactly right!
 
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