What is the key to knowing you better? | INFJ Forum

What is the key to knowing you better?

Odyne

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For me, it's patience. It takes some time for me to establish a rapport with someone and drop the formalities. I also observe and watch for sincerity and authenticity in people before I share a bit of myself, and that takes time as well, sometimes even test them, so they would have to be patient. But once I am in, I am in for a long time. :]



What's your key?




keyru.jpg
 
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understanding.
 
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What's your key?

there really isn't a key to knowing me better
i do not share my deep personal self with anyone, and that includes my partner. he accepts that i will always be a bit of a curiosity, mystery, what have you...
 
Trust... to trust me that everything I say to someone is exactly how I feel.
Respect...to accept me as I am, a person with faults, but also a person who is very well aware of those faults and is in a constant struggle to overcome them...I do not need your help, criticism or input.
 
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Honesty... I believe it's the gateway to trust. I can't trust in someone who isn't honest with their intentions, motives, feelings, etc.
 
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I'm not sure I have any "keys" beyond of patience/understanding - You have to be "real" I guess, and not stab me in the back...but I rarely ever make good new friends (so not much of an issue) There have been friends/people who've known me for years and still didn't know what I was really like - I can think of maybe two people(total) that actually knew the real me.

To put it simply, I'm not opening up unless I really trust someone...and that may take years.

I guess it's also important to note that this description is about how to know me "well"; I can form surface relationships without too much difficulty - I can usually form to/act in accordance with the groups wants/needs, but you won't really "know me" unless were talking/getting to know each other one on one.
 
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make me feel comfortable. Don't ask too many questions. It feels as if I'm being interrogated. :D I don't like talking about myself but I don't mind talking about my feelings or thoughts about something. Don't expect me to be entertaining or particularly sparkling. Don't expect to find something spectacular as if I have some secret you want to know or figure out. I'm not that complicated. Don't look for me to dassle you with something mysterious or unique. If you want to get to know me, then be honest with yourself - get to know me, not what you want me to be or what you imagine me to be. And don't pretend to care or have the same interests as I do.
 
Nicely said... Some people are like energy vampires for me...as if I am there to make every decision, to entertain them...
It is enough just to "be" sometimes... can't you just enjoy each others company without it being something new and amazing...
Don't assume things about me and then get angry when I disappoint you....that one seems to be a recurring stint.
 
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Nicely said... Some people are like energy vampires for me...as if I am there to make every decision, to entertain them...
It is enough just to "be" sometimes... can't you just enjoy each others company without it being something new and amazing...
Don't assume things about me and then get angry when I disappoint you....that one seems to be a recurring stint.


+100
 
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Lol
 
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My last relationship is the prime example...she actually went from resentment to hatred based on the ideas and assumptions she made about me... The thing is all those assumptions that she made I would have put forth the effort to give to her if only she didn't show her obvious disdain and resentment....blah.
 
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Being honest with yourself. If you're not honest with yourself, then what are you?
 
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