What does an INFJ want?

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I was talking to someone recently who I suspect is INFJ and they were telling me how they think the world should be, being very idealistic and unrealistic. I could see things from his point of view and I agreed that his way would be nice, but I just didnt see it as something that could be implemented in real life.

What do you think he as an INFJ was looking for? What would have been a good response? I was being honest with him but it seemed to just go in one ear and out the other (possibly between both parties).
 
Maybe an ISFJ.

I couldn't see an INFJ being irrational like that. An INFJ would at least be able to identify with your position he wouldn't be able to help but to get what you meant. If this guy couldn't, then maybe it was an ISFJ or something along those lines.
 
I would say peace. Inner and outer. And he just wants to dream. He may not fully believe his dream entertain his fancy could be fun...
 
corndogman said:
I was talking to someone recently who I suspect is INFJ and they were telling me how they think the world should be, being very idealistic and unrealistic. I could see things from his point of view and I agreed that his way would be nice, but I just didnt see it as something that could be implemented in real life.

What do you think he as an INFJ was looking for? What would have been a good response? I was being honest with him but it seemed to just go in one ear and out the other (possibly between both parties).
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Could have also been an INFP or maybe an ENF type. Though it sounds like you were reasonable, it didnt seem either that he was being very pragmatic about things -- so you have a right to be critical especially if he is wanting you to adopt the same plan. (I personally will not adopt a plan if it has no accompanying logic telling me why, or if I cannot reason myself to agree with the plan)

In organizations there is 3 kinds of plans you can make (scope-based not task-based). A vision plan, mission plan, and action plan.

The vision plan often summed up in a vague, abstract vision statement is a statement of how you see the end results of what you would ultimately like to accomplish. The mission plan involves required resources needed to fulfil your vision, and the action plan is direct tangible actions which you will take in order to fulfill your mission(s).

Likewise, all 3 plans are important. If you lack any one of those components then the scope of your success will be impacted.

The ideal society thing that the person was relaying to you is equivalent to a vision plan. Things would work ideally if conditions x and y were met. I think to some extent, a lot of people (except for the most sensing of sensors) have an idea of how things should ultimately be to make a 'perfect society'. Unfortunately given that people are driven by self-interest and their own visions (ie: cooperation vs competition), failing to factor that in and make the accompanying missions and actions a priority, it will be an ultimately fruitless, though perhaps pleasant thing to ponder.
 
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Billy said:
Maybe an ISFJ.

I couldn't see an INFJ being irrational like that. An INFJ would at least be able to identify with your position he wouldn't be able to help but to get what you meant. If this guy couldn't, then maybe it was an ISFJ or something along those lines.
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Just because he isn't able to identify and understand someone else, doesn't automatically make them something other then an INFJ. He very well could be, maybe not. Uber would know best in this situation.

An undeveloped INFJ is a scary thing, and can be horridly stubborn and unable to understand what another person is trying to say.
 
Is this a general "what an INFJ" wants thread or just specific to the OP?
 
IndigoSensor said:
Just because he isn't able to identify and understand someone else, doesn't automatically make them something other then an INFJ. He very well could be, maybe not. Uber would know best in this situation.

An undeveloped INFJ is a scary thing, and can be horridly stubborn and unable to understand what another person is trying to say.
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And yet he would still be realistic enough to know that he was being irrational.
 
Billy said:
And yet he would still be realistic enough to know that he was being irrational.
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Nope, I have seen many many many times where an INFJ fails to see that they are being irrational. It's actually REALLY common. INFJ's are not gods.
 
Good points Zero Angel, I had thought something similar but you really fleshed it out.

It just seemed like he was trying to get some kind of response out of me but it wasnt working and he was getting frustrated. The convo was basically him describing his own utopia and then I would say that is a good goal but it is unrealistic for reasons xyz. His plan of action was that people should all just make a mass change in behavior, for reasons unexplained except to enact this utopia.

Eventually I just said something to the effect of that would be a nice world to live in, but he still seemed unhappy as if I just want getting it. I think the only way he would think I "got it" was if I just blindly and totally agreed with him and became a member of his own personal utopia club. IDK.

I believe he typed as INFJ when he took the test, but I could be wrong.
 
Yeah, a lot of the time when people talk about grandiose visions like that, they often want nothing more then the other party to express the same enthuiasm as they have. They aren't even completely aware that it is what they want. When someone gets frusterated like that, 99% of the time that is the case. They are dissapointed that they failed to elict a "omg your so right! that is awesome" response.
 
IndigoSensor said:
Nope, I have seen many many many times where an INFJ fails to see that they are being irrational. It's actually REALLY common. INFJ's are not gods.
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awwwwww! *disappointedly drops his godly hammer of smite and walks out*
 
IndigoSensor said:
Nope, I have seen many many many times where an INFJ fails to see that they are being irrational. It's actually REALLY common. INFJ's are not gods.
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Yup, and no one said they were gods, but I like to think I understand the way an INFJ thinks. And even in their most fervent zeal they still usually try to see all points of view involved in whatever they're involved in, even if its just intensely wondering about them. Thats just the way we're wired.
 
Billy said:
Yup, and no one said they were gods, but I like to think I understand the way an INFJ thinks. And even in their most fervent zeal they still usually try to see all points of view involved in whatever they're involved in, even if its just intensely wondering about them. Thats just the way we're wired.
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I don't know. The few times I get into that over-zealous mode I get so worked up in my mind about my ideas and how right they are that anyone who disagrees with me is instantly wrong regardless of how rational they were and how irrational I am. It's not until I cool down and think it out that I realize how wrong I was, and that process can take days or weeks. I also think all people regardless of type are susceptible to temporary blindness and tunnel vision.
 
mf said:
I don't know. The few times I get into that over-zealous mode I get so worked up in my mind about my ideas and how right they are that anyone who disagrees with me is instantly wrong regardless of how rational they were and how irrational I am. It's not until I cool down and think it out that I realize how wrong I was, and that process can take days or weeks. I also think all people regardless of type are susceptible to temporary blindness and tunnel vision.
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this
 
corndogman said:
I was talking to someone recently who I suspect is INFJ and they were telling me how they think the world should be, being very idealistic and unrealistic. I could see things from his point of view and I agreed that his way would be nice, but I just didnt see it as something that could be implemented in real life.

What do you think he as an INFJ was looking for? What would have been a good response? I was being honest with him but it seemed to just go in one ear and out the other (possibly between both parties).
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corndogman said:
Good points Zero Angel, I had thought something similar but you really fleshed it out.

It just seemed like he was trying to get some kind of response out of me but it wasnt working and he was getting frustrated. The convo was basically him describing his own utopia and then I would say that is a good goal but it is unrealistic for reasons xyz. His plan of action was that people should all just make a mass change in behavior, for reasons unexplained except to enact this utopia.

Eventually I just said something to the effect of that would be a nice world to live in, but he still seemed unhappy as if I just want getting it. I think the only way he would think I "got it" was if I just blindly and totally agreed with him and became a member of his own personal utopia club. IDK.

I believe he typed as INFJ when he took the test, but I could be wrong.
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I think it was a good idea that you confronted him to reality. Sometimes INFJ's are so bogged down in their Ni+Ti world, that it doesn't seem to match with what's practical. Giving him your opinion(even if it wasn't something that he agreed on) gave him a more realistic view on how the world works.

I sometimes would come up with some weird idealistic theories on how the world should be run, it isn't until someone slaps me with some doses of rationalism that I see things clearer. An outside's perspective is always helpful in any endeavor.
 
Billy said:
Maybe an ISFJ.

I couldn't see an INFJ being irrational like that. An INFJ would at least be able to identify with your position he wouldn't be able to help but to get what you meant. If this guy couldn't, then maybe it was an ISFJ or something along those lines.
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Se is more rational than Ni.

Just sayin'.

*cough* excuse me, thought you meant ISFP... carry on.

Oh but INFJ's can still be very irrational.
 
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mf said:
I don't know. The few times I get into that over-zealous mode I get so worked up in my mind about my ideas and how right they are that anyone who disagrees with me is instantly wrong regardless of how rational they were and how irrational I am. It's not until I cool down and think it out that I realize how wrong I was, and that process can take days or weeks. I also think all people regardless of type are susceptible to temporary blindness and tunnel vision.
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The analogy of a balloon being blown up 'til it bursts, maybe? I could see how an 'unhealthy' INFJ could become very irrational when it comes to what they really want because, well, they don't usually know EXACTLY what it is they want so they say a lot of stuff that sounds good to them, but they might not like if it was real.
 
I dunno; I tend to agree with the Op's friend. The world could be so much better, and it's not even all that unrealistic a thing except where people are involved. The amount of responsibility it would take to 'get there' is actually rather small when distributed equally among all people. The burden would be light. And yet, good luck getting people to participate.

Though recent tests have fluctuated, I still read INFJ as being the closest to me, and I think the above. What I want is for all those people to do their fair share, be good to one another, have some vision, care, et cetera. On a more personal level, I want good company.
 
1. INFJs don't want similar things. 2. Any type has irrational and rational moments. 3. Assuming things the way they are is irrational too.
 
enfp can be shy said:
1. INFJs don't want similar things. 2. Any type has irrational and rational moments. 3. Assuming things the way they are is irrational too.
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Quoting post to emphasize ultimate truth.

Also, I've long stopped all that "how to fix the world" stuff. It doesn't do any good because the world just doesn't want to be "fixed" and nor do people. If it gets better it gets better slowly, gradually and usually never in the areas you're focusing on.
 
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