"weird" INFJ | INFJ Forum

"weird" INFJ

Icedream

Icedream

Nothing more than a thought
Apr 14, 2017
5,402
16,657
2,909
MBTI
INFJ
Has anyone else been misunderstood by fellow INFJ's? I've been told that I'm very different from most other INFJ's, and not in a good way (lol)

People have typed me as INFP or INTJ, but those who know me best know I'm a Ni dom, and that I'm a feeler. My question is, what could be wrong with me?
 
  • Like
Reactions: Jexocuha, Wyote, RonjaRaeubertochter and 5 others
Nothing is wrong. People are complex and there is a lot of variation even within types. You will even see here that the infjs each have distinct personalities. Just because you share the same type doesn't mean you're going to be just alike.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Jexocuha, StRoNgO, JennyDaniella and 11 others
Icedream said:
Let me clarify. In a community of only INFJ's, I was looked upon as an outsider. Not that I blame them, I'm not an easy person to like.
Click to expand...
One thing I can say I've noticed that is consistent with INFJs is they have a hard time dealing with conflict. (I think it's due to the Fe.) Did you get involved in a lot of conflicts or arguments?
What do you mean you aren't easy to like?
 
  • Like
Reactions: Jexocuha, ClevelandINTP, Free and 2 others
acd said:
Well if you are conscious of doing this, I think you could work on it. Especially if you see it causing more damage than doing defense. There are other healthier ways of maintaining boundaries.
Click to expand...

Like humour, and body language. Any kind of deflection, really. There's no need to be offensive.

Although I must say that maintaining boundaries doesn't seem very healthy to me in the long run. It's not very good for the social side of Fe. I'm speaking from experience.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Jexocuha, Misty, Free and 2 others
Ginny said:
Like humour, and body language. Any kind of deflection, really. There's no need to be offensive.

Although I must say that maintaining boundaries doesn't seem very healthy to me in the long run. It's not very good for the social side of Fe. I'm speaking from experience.
Click to expand...
You can have good boundaries and still be social and have positive relationships.

By boundaries I mean having a good sense of self and what is good for you and not letting others take advantage of you or not taking advantage of others. Boundaries are a good thing. It's the lack of boundaries that creates problems. I think being hyper defensive to the point if being offensive is over compensation for not being sure of personal boundaries.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Jexocuha, Wildfire, CosmicINFJ and 5 others
acd said:
You can have good boundaries and still be social and have positive relationships.

By boundaries I mean having a good sense of self and what is good for you and not letting others take advantage of you or not taking advantage of others. Boundaries are a good thing. It's the lack of boundaries that creates problems. I think being hyper defensive to the point if being offensive is over compensation for not being sure of personal boundaries.
Click to expand...

This realigns our perspectives. I only had the bad boundaries in mind, given the context. The word in general has very negative connotations. I would have described your good boundaries differently, I'd interpreted it as being steadfast. But I agree nonetheless.

I think this kind of hyper-definsiveness is not just over-compensation, it can also occur as a preventive measure, but for the same underlying reason. I guess it can also go the other way around, you being sure of your boundaries, but others not. It might result in the same behaviour, right?
 
  • Like
Reactions: Jexocuha, Infjente, Free and 1 other person
Hi @Icedream :) You're not weird. Everyone is different, even among people of the same type. Our individual experiences, age, culture, who we spend the most time with (and therefore who influences us), and talents all make up who we are as well. There are even theories that there are different subtypes of INFJs inside the type.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Jexocuha, CosmicINFJ, Misty and 6 others
Icedream said:
My question is, what could be wrong with me?
Click to expand...
I wouldn't get caught up in all of the typology mess. We're all different. If you like your life and how you're living, continue the direction you're going in. If you're not pleased with how your life is going then things have got to change.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Jexocuha, CosmicINFJ, Free and 2 others
Icedream said:
Has anyone else been misunderstood by fellow INFJ's? I've been told that I'm very different from most other INFJ's, and not in a good way (lol)

People have typed me as INFP or INTJ, but those who know me best know I'm a Ni dom, and that I'm a feeler. My question is, what could be wrong with me?
Click to expand...

Maybe you are weird. One thing I notice right off the bat is that you have posted a considerably shorter post than most INFJs coming onto the forum. Not only that but you aren't questioning if you are truly an INFJ... there seems to be a confidence you have that you know you are an INFJ. That is unusual as well.

You have really provided no information about yourself and then expect the forum to know the reason you are an outcast among INFJs. Well I definitely don't know the answer, but what's so wrong with being weird anyways?
 
  • Like
Reactions: Jexocuha, CosmicINFJ, Stu and 2 others
weirdness is beyond typology, it's its own entity.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Jexocuha, jyrffw54, CosmicINFJ and 9 others
the said:
Maybe you are weird. One thing I notice right off the bat is that you have posted a considerably shorter post than most INFJs coming onto the forum. Not only that but you aren't questioning if you are truly an INFJ... there seems to be a confidence you have that you know you are an INFJ. That is unusual as well.

You have really provided no information about yourself and then expect the forum to know the reason you are an outcast among INFJs. Well I definitely don't know the answer, but what's so wrong with being weird anyways?
Click to expand...
First off, I've been on the forum for a while, I just don't post very often, so this isn't an introduction for me. I only say what I feel needs to be said and when. Yes, I've come to a surety of my type through about three years of studying.

My apologies. What would you like to know about me?
It's not so much being "weird" that bothers me, it's being shunned.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Jexocuha, Free, CosmicINFJ and 1 other person
I wouldn't worry about being weird, weirdness is a badge of honour around here. It's natural to worry about being shunned and I think it's also common amongst INFJ's. Just relax and be yourself.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Jexocuha, CosmicINFJ, Misty and 5 others
Icedream said:
First off, I've been on the forum for a while, I just don't post very often, so this isn't an introduction for me. I only say what I feel needs to be said and when. Yes, I've come to a surety of my type through about three years of studying.

My apologies. What would you like to know about me?
It's not so much being "weird" that bothers me, it's being shunned.
Click to expand...

If it's being shunned that you are wondering about it's probably because you're rude like you said in an earlier post. /problemsolved.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Jexocuha, Free and (deleted member)
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom
Back