Religion/Culture vs. Love | INFJ Forum

Religion/Culture vs. Love


Well-known member
Feb 27, 2009
If you're in love with someone but know you can't be together in the long run for religious/cultural purposes and you don't do anything about it, are you truly in love with the person?

I already know how I feel about this. I'm curious as to what others think.
i don't really know about the "really in love" part, there's a lot of grey there and alot of ambiguity and definition area, but i know that the relationship wouldn't work very well (assuming they were serious about their culture/religion.)
I'm having a hard time wrapping my mind around the idea of following a religion that contradicts/conflicts with a relationship you are in with someone you truly love.

Is it even possible to faithfully follow a religion and be in love with a particular person, contrary to [your interpretation of] that religion?

Also, I agree that there are a lot of grey areas here. It depends on the specifics of the situation.
Last edited:
It probably depends on the person. Some people are more broad in their approach and some aren't. Some religious/culturual traditions are broader and more diverse, too.

If it is a matter of expression, that is one thing, but I have known people with whom it was a matter of an entire life perspective. Believe it or not, this can even happen if two people are from the same basic religious tradition, too.
I think it depends on the personality of the people involved. For some people that answer is yes, for others it's no.

There is a lot more to love than feelings. Building a future together means taking into account practical realities, and that's quite complicated for some people depending on family, culture, religion, and preferences about all of that. Or maybe it means that love is not equal - many people feel they're in love, but I think the depth/strength of love varies among relationships, even if each person would agree that they're the most fulfilled, loved, and in love that they can imagine being. There are so many factors, it's impossible to answer one way or another.
  • Like
Reactions: Gaze
Another thing: I think regardless of the situation, as in whether or not it involves religion, if you are continuing to build a relationship with someone that you intend to break off in the future, you are only doing a disservice to the one you allegedly love. It's different if, maybe, you're young and your parents are pressuring you to do one thing that you really don't agree with, and maybe you intend to fight that battle when the time comes. If you, personally, are already set in your convictions, though, it's just wrong. And what is the point?

It's still a tricky topic, though. So many aspects of romantic relationships could be construed as selfish depending on how you look at them.